Come To Think Of It: There's No Crying In Cubs Baseball

"Are you crying? Are you crying? ARE YOU CRYING? There's no crying! THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!"

That famous line from the movie A League of Their Own notwithstanding, there are plenty of Cubs fans crying over the team's August meltdown, which has left them pretty much all but dead for 2009.

Well, maybe not crying literally, but certainly shocked, frustrated, disappointed, angry, sad - you name it, Cubs fans feel it.

But not me. Nope. I am fine. Not because I don't care; hey, there is no one who wants to see the Cubs win the World Series more than I do. I've been rooting for this team for about 40 years.

But I learned a long time ago not to expect success. Call me a pessimist if you must, but I prefer to think of myself as a realist. Believe me, it's much easier this way.

While I don't remember much of the collapse of 1969 (well, the Mets certainly had a lot to do with that, to be fair), having gone through 1984, 1989, 1998, 2003 and 2008 has left me comfortably numb when it comes to the Cubs.

Yes, I'm angry with the way the team has mailed it in this season. Yes, it still bothers me when Jim Hendry makes moves that don't work out; when Lou sticks with players he shouldn't and refuses to hold them accountable; and when the Rookie of the Year comes into camp fat and smoky.

But it's all part of this disease known as being a Cubs fan.

Oh sure, there are positives to this incurable condition. There's beautiful (though antiquated) Wrigley Field; there's the passion and the division titles of the past two seasons. And yes, even the losing, they say, builds character.

If so, Cubs fans have more character than the Octomom has children.

Meanwhile, I know that sports is important, especially in Chicago, a great sports town if there ever was one. We love our Cubbies and we live and die with them.

But I'm here to tell you don't do it. Don't let the Cubs ruin your day, your week, your year...your life. They will never fail to disappoint. They may never win the World Series again.

I know that's harsh, but it's the only way to think. This way, we are pleasantly surprised if it happens and aren't suicidal if it doesn't.

I'm not suggesting we become bandwagon fans, only hopping on when the team is doing well. Yet, we cannot and should not base our summer on the results of a team that hasn't been in a Series in...well, you don't need to be reminded.

Would life be easier if we were fans of a team with a winning history? Of course, but like we can't choose our parents, we also cannot choose our team. We are Cubs fans, and there is nothing we can do about it.

It's a rough gig, but somebody's got to do it, right?

But the answer isn't to be blissfully ignorant, either. We need to voice our unhappiness with the direction of this club. It is not only our right, it is our duty. It is the only hope we have of forcing change.

You should understand that you are not being a bad fan of the Cubs if you voice displeasure. In fact, it shows you care. That passion is burning inside you and it can't be all wine and roses my friends.

This is not only a team going nowhere, it is not a very likable team. Yes, Ryan Theriot is likable; Derrek Lee seems like a good guy; Randy Wells has been a pleasant surprise.

But any team with the moody Milton Bradley and the lethargic Alfonso Soriano cannot be a team you are proud of.  You just want to say, "Shut up Milton! Run hard and quit showboating, Fonzie!"

They say keep the faith. I implore you to keep up the pressure. Don't let new owner Tom Ricketts think you accept this mediocrity from a team with a payroll of $140 million.

Yes, it can be tough being a Cubs fan. But trust me, it's a heck of a lot easier if you manage your expectations accordingly.

And anyway, all you have to do is remember what Dottie Hinson said to Jimmy Dugan.

"Yeah. It is only a game, Jimmy. It's only a game, and, and, I don't need this."

Sounds like a mantra for all Cubs fans, come to think of it.