Tweeting the Eastern Conference Finals: Game One

Pregame

Turkoglu may not understand English but he understands Craig Sager has horrible fashion sense.

A purple suit, purple tie, purple shirt, where does he shop, Pimps’ Warehouse?

The Howard–LeBron attempted–hype matchup requires Howard actually showing up on offense

Odds on Pietrus starting?  21–1

Delonte is a bad matchup for Redick?  Everything is a bad matchup for Redick

1st Quarter

Starting lineup: Lee, Alston, Howard, Turkoglu, Lewis

11:42– First points, Varejão

11:15– Varejão with two more, Cavs up 4–0

11:01– Howard ripped down the shot clock!  Holy crap, what a dunk!

11:01 (delay)– C. Sager’s reporting on the shot clock.  Did Howard pull it down or did Sager’s suit cause shot clock suicide?

11:01 (delay)– SVG looks surprisingly relaxed.  Either he resigned to defeat or he’s found Zoloft.

11:01 (delay)– Write this down: if Howard’s going to have a big playoff series, it will happen against Cleveland.

11:00 (seven minutes after shot clock-icide)–  Ooh we’re back, Cleveland ball.

10:28– Cleveland can move the ball.  Every player on their team can pass

10:08– Alston 3, Magic 0–2 from beyond so far

9:49– West 3, Bron assist.

9:42– Magic TO, 9–2 Cleveland

9:42 (commercial)– Land of the Lost looks terrible.  Absolutely terrible.  Ron Burgundy won’t save that disaster

9:42 (Sager)– Apparently the Magic’s practice facility is Howard dunk proof.  Is that more ridiculous than Sager’s suit?

9:32– Howard dunk (shot clocks safe) 9–4 Cleveland.

8:33– West with another 3

7:30– Magic are shooting 25% right now (2–8) 14–4 Cleveland

6:57– Howard has all 6 magic points

6:08– Howard’s height gets the best of him, he goal–tended at 13.5ft.  19–6 Cleveland.

5:33– First LeBron vs Howard–I goes to Howard.  James had to shoot that ball straight up

5:24– Howard with another make he’s got 8

5:00– Alston with a 3, first non–Howard points for the Magic

4:41– Ilgauskas via LeBron

4:30– Pietrus comes in, first shot made 3. 21–14 Cleveland

4:04– Howard blocked by Verajão

3:54– Howard takes revenge on… Courtney Lee?  Isn’t that how he got that mask in the first place?

3:42– Howard goaltend.  James first points. 23–14

3:03– I’ve updated this quarter more than I did the entire first half of Magic–Celts’ Game 7.

2:42– James 3.  That’s his second make.  Cavs by 14 (SVG Zoloft Level– coming down)

2:25– Howard’s got 10.

1:35– Joe Smith huge block on Lewis

1:25– LeBron throws it down on the fast break

1:08– Howard vs LeBron–II goes to LeBron with a massive block.

1:00– James 3 (10 points in 2:32)

:40– Cavs with another takeaway.

:30.6– Pietrus kept LeBron away from the ball and made a nice dunk on the fastbreak

:00–  33–19 Cleveland.  LeBron vs Howard update: Both have 10 points

2nd Quarter

Sager!– SVG panic level– rising!!!  What do you do with LeBron?  "I Don’t KNOW!!" Get him another Zoloft.

11:32– Cavs score off of a steal

11:16– Howard make 35–21 Cavs

10:38– Howard and Joe Smith fighting away from the ball, no whistle

10:04– Howard makes West stop in his tracks on a clear layup drive.  He alters shots and causes extra passes without moving.  Respect

8:38– 41–26 Cavs.  Orlando’s got to stop the Cavs before they can get back into this –John Madden

8:38– SVG Panic Level– AHHHHHHH!!!! Put in RedicK?

8:26– Howard with a shot clock killing dunk, if he hadn’t already done that. 16 points

7:30– Weird, terrible possession by West.  He just dribbled for 24 seconds and shot off of his back

7:16– Howard with his 2nd foul.  Both offensive.  I’m offended.

6:45– Gortat’s in for Howard, still no Redick (is someone actually coaching the Magic tonight?)

6:08–Gortat throws the ball of Varejão’s elbow, Cleveland ball?  Playoffs: where bad officiating happens!

5:05– Pietrus on James.  I don’t know about that match–up

4:52– Ilgauskas uncontested driving dunk.  Did I just type that?

4:15– Pietrus on James. I don’t like that match–up

3:55– Varejão got throat chopped on a Pietrus pick.  Not a dirty play but ouch.

3:55– After commercial he’s up, but still coughing.

3:55– Apparently a foul occurred.  Howard’s taking free throws. Varejão still in

3:46– LeBron baseline dunk, uncontested.  He’s too fast

3:26– Pietrus baseline layup. He should start

3:03– LeBron is doing whatever he wants on Pietrus.  Isn’t there someone else to guard the MVP (not Redick, Stan)?

3:03– Biggest storyline of the game?  Howard’s got 3 PFs and when he’s in, he’s dominating.  The Magic need him tonight

2:45– Turkoglu with a 3. 53–42 Cavs

2:15– Turkoglu’s on James now.  Pietrus is out.  Is this a better match–up?

1:23– James 12 of the Cavs last 14 points.  He’s taking over at the ends of quarters

:50.8– Biggest storyline of the year?  Bron can shoot now. If he’s open he’s making it

:08.6– James with another! 26 points

:00– Mo Williams with a 68 footer!!! Holy $#@$!!  That was inside the opposite 3 pt arc.  63–48 Cavs if it counts

Halftime

Odds on the first highlights?  I’ve got Howard shot-clockicide over Mo Williams' shot

First highlights– Dwight, then Shaq killing the goal against the Suns

LeBron vs Howard update– LeBron 26 points, 1.6 points per shot (crazy stat alert!), Howard 18 points

3rd Quarter

11:37– Tip in by Howard.

10:54– Howard with another. Now he needs to get some defense

10:16– Orlando on a 6–0 run

9:54– So much for that.  James with 2

9:43– LeBron vs Howard III– LeBron with a big win.  Blocked the shot, forced a Howard tech.  made the FT

9:04– LeBron’s ridiculous. 30 points.  This is at the 9:04 mark of the 3rd quarter!  MVP is an understatement

8:14– LeBron vs Howard IV– All Dwight with a dunk

7:32– Big Z shooting a 3? He’s no Dirk

7:07– Howard settles for a layup over Big Z and misses. He could have backed him down another foot and dunked it.

6:37– Jim Brown’s there. LeBron is the Jim Brown of basketball. Funny how that works

5:48– What a ridiculously athletic play.  Alston blew past James. Off balanced, LeBron fell back and managed a block.

5:39– Howard with a reversed alleyoop dunk. 71–65 Cavs

4:29– not too many SVG shots tonight.  Usually they like to show him flustered, which happens to be always.

4:07– There he is!  SVG looks panicked concerned

3:44– Courtney Lee is too short to pass out. Somebody on the Magic has to realize this. Why leave him alone to get trapped?

3:15– Lewis with a 3. 75–70 Cavs

2:49– LeBron misses a 3, gets his own rebound

2:35– Pietrus with a 3 (start him!).  75–73 Cavs

2:03– LeBron hits a long 2

1:49– Pietrus answers with his own long 2

1:21– LeBron, long 3. 37 points

1:12– Alston with a 3 point play.  At least the Magic are hanging with LeBron’s ridiculous offense. 80–78

1:02– Howard mauled LeBron.  Actually the block was all ball. Called the body contact though.  4th personal

:45.4– James realizes when Howard’s not in front of him and he makes the Magic pay.  He’s at 39–5–6 right now

:28.2– LeBron draws an offensive foul on Pietrus.

:1.3– Lee shoots up a stupid buzzer beater.  Only there’s no buzzer.  Not for another second.  Dumb.

4th Quarter

11:40– Mo Williams ends the 20 seconds of scoreless–ness and the 4th is off!

10:52– Lewis is 6/10 with 14 points. 84–82 Cavs

10:07– Johnson with a 3. Magic first lead! Get SVG a defibrillator!

8:34– Another Howard alley–oop.  87–86 Magic.

7:49– Howard beats Big Z again. He’s got 30. How did Perkins shut this guy down?

6:14– Howard vs LeBron VI– Anthony Johnson with the steal. Push or Howard? I’ll let you decide.

6:07– Pietrus with FTs. 90–88 Magic

5:52– Risky play by Howard jumping on Varejão.  Lucky for the no call. Game tied

5:52– I’d just like to point out how exciting this game has been. Wow. After the crap from rd 2, I thought the playoffs had lost their luster.

5:52– Howard vs James update: James 41 points, 6 reb, 7 ast. Howard 30 pts, 12 reb

5:11– Magic lineup: Alston Pietrus Turkoglu Howard Lewis. Yes! Yes! Yes!

5:06– And the basketball gods approve of SVG’s good lineup decision.  Turkoglu 3. Magic by 3

4:06– LeBron robbed the Alley–oop from Howard. Wow. That was a fast move.

3:50– LeBron dunk.  Uncontested.  Too Slow, Orlando. 93–92 Orlando.

3:08– LeBron 2. Pietrus cannot guard LeBron. Pietrus can play offense. What to do, SVG?

2:47– :20 TO, Cavs.  95–94 Magic

2:47– LeBron’s tired?  No, "Boy definitely get's his Vitamins!"

2:29– Lewis 3. 98–94 Magic

2:04– Mo Williams answers. Magic by 1

1:40– James on the line. If I were Mike Brown, I’d start calling TOs and force the Magic to listen to SVG for 20 seconds

1:17– Stupid foul by Varejão. He got right in front of Turkoglu and Turkoglu jumped into him. 2 FTs by an 81% shooter

1:04– Howard touch, Howard touch, Howard touch.  Nope.  SVG PANIC!!!!

:40.8– Cavs up 1.  PANIC!!!!!!!!!!!

:40.8– How can you not give Howard the ball right now? SVG will surely find a way to screw this up

:31.6– Lewis saves SVG’s career. If he missed that, game over

:25.6– LeBron and 1.  Dwight fouls out.  LeBron vs. Howard VII: LeBron. Cleveland by 2. “I’m panicked” –SVG

:14.7– Rashard! Holy That was huge! 107–106 Magic

:1.0– Jump ball, Magic are up by 1.  I’m going crazy. If LeBron wins here, Jordanesque

:00– Almost! My heart! Magic steal one from the Cavs! What a game!

:00– Ok, LeBron was a tired. I think it was due to 49 points, though; not because he hadn't played in 8 days.