The Kid, The 'Cane, and The Old Timer Pick: Week 17

As we have reached the final week of the regular season, we have been proud to be YOUR source for whom not to pick this NFL season.  It has been a wild and wacky one this year, and it has been nearly impossible to try to predict what is going to happen from week to week.  

The Lions have probably been the only consistent team in the league all season long, although I’m sure they are not proud of that.  Tell me another team that you could say what was going to happen going into a Sunday?  Giants, Titans, Steelers fit the bill best for the good teams, but even they have been shaky against the spread. 

Anyways, I have been horrible about posting this article for the past few weeks what with the holidays and all the preparation that goes with them (not to mention the embarrassment of our picks!). 

Here are the results of the picks from the last few weeks, and if anyone truly wants to see the picks from the past weeks I would be happy to supply them, but really why would you want that?

The Kid
Week 14:  11-4 (whoo hoo!)
Week 15:  5-7-2 (d’oh!)
Week 16:  5-10 (double d’oh!)

The ‘Cane
Week 14:  10-5
Week 15:  8-4-2
Week 16:  3-12 (left the door open for the Kid!)

The Old Timer
Week 14:  9-6 (too little, too late)
Week 15:  6-6-2
Week 16:  7-7

Heading into the final week, the standings are as follows:

The ‘Cane:          103-101-9
The Kid:             100-104-9
The Old Timer:    90-113-9

Plenty of drama here in the final week, as the Kid and the ‘Cane have picked seven games differently going into Week 17 so there will be ample opportunities to make up that three game difference. 

The Old Timer, on the other hand, has been playing out the string for quite a while now.  He just isn’t the same when there isn’t a little coin on the line.

As I try to sneak out a victory in this contest on my own website I would just like to quote the soon-to-be permanent head coach of my beloved 49ers, Mike Singletary and say “I WANT WINNERS!!!!” 

I’m not going to drop my drawers to try to fire my teams up, but I’d hate to lose this one to my brother.  If I lose by a game or perhaps two, maybe you will see “The Kid, The ‘Cane, and the Old Timer Pick The Playoffs” in an attempt to give me more games in which to take over the lead. 

So, without anymore rambling, here are the Week 17 picks for the handful of you still following this ridiculous competition.  Enjoy!

TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS -13.5 vs. Oakland Raiders

The Kid says: Bucs.  This was a tough pick for me because the Raiders have put forth a decent effort in a handful of games this year.  However, they have to be so happy that this nightmare of a season is almost over, and to finish it off they have to travel across the country to face a team that needs the game to keep playoff hopes alive.  I don’t like giving so many points with Tampa, but the Raiders should mail this one in.

The ‘Cane says: Raiders.   Looking a little better recently, maybe they are finally getting it.

The Old Timer says: BUCS -13.5

GREEN BAY PACKERS -9.5 vs. Detroit Lions

The Kid says: Packers.  If Detroit was going to get one, I think it would have been last week.  Can they muster up one effort good enough to get a ‘W’?  I just don’t think so.  Packer fans will have all season to vilify Aaron Rodgers if he loses to a team with no wins, but I see the Pack winning big.

The ‘Cane says: Lions.  Gotta try to get it done.  They have to be motivated.

The Old Timer says: PACKERS -9.5.  Lions are This Years Dolphins

PHILADELPHIA EAGLES -1 vs. Dallas Cowboys

The Kid says: Dallas.  Will Jessica Simpson be there?  I know the Eagles still have an outside chance, but I honestly see Dallas blowing their doors off.  Look for Romo and Co. to blast into the playoffs...and probably lose in the first round again.

The ‘Cane says: Philly.  They would love to knock the inconsistent Cowboys out of the playoffs.  (Ed. note:  There’s a confident Cowboys fan for you!)

The Old Timer says: EAGLES -1

MINNESOTA VIKINGS -6.5 vs. New York Giants
The Kid says: Giants.  I don’t see the Giants resting everyone for their last game, only the guys who are legitimately hurt.  They didn’t lay down last year when they had nothing to play for, and I think coach Coughlin will have them ready.  I don’t know if they will win, but I can’t give this team nearly a touchdown.

The ‘Cane says: Minny.  Giants have nothing left to gain.

The Old Timer says: VIKES -6.5.  Another too bad to be true bet.

HOUSTON TEXANS -1 vs. Chicago Bears

The Kid says: Bears.  Houston’s season is over and they just got beat badly last week. The Bears need this one to keep any thoughts of a division title alive, and I think they will take care of their business.

The ‘Cane says: Houston.  Balanced Texans will hold off Bears.

The Old Timer says: TEXANS -1

Carolina Panthers -3 at NEW ORLEANS SAINTS

The Kid says: Panthers.  Carolina will look to get back on track after losing a heartbreaker to New York and home-field advantage.  I just can’t see the Saints defense being able to deal with DeAngelo Williams, Steve Smith, and Jonathan Stewart.

The ‘Cane says: Panthers.  Carolina will know that Brees is going for the passing record and will set their D accordingly.

The Old Timer says: CAROLINA -3

ATLANTA FALCONS -15 vs. St. Louis Rams
The Kid says: Falcons.  Atlanta is already in the playoffs but, the Rams are just awful.  This is a ton of points for a team that doesn’t score too many, but the Rams just can’t win a game.  Hell, they were beating San Francisco by 10 points and couldn’t hold that lead.  Look for Atlanta to score early and often and blow out the Rams.

The ‘Cane says: Falcons.  Ryan and the young Falcons will cruise into the playoffs with an easy victory against pathetic Rams.

The Old Timer says: ATLANTA -15

CINCINNATI BENGALS -3 vs. Kansas City Chiefs

The Kid says: Chiefs.  Bottom line here is I don’t care if they are at home, I just can’t bring myself to give points with the Bengals.  Oh, and by the way can you think of a worse game to end the season?  Is anyone going to watch this one?

The ‘Cane says: Chiefs.  Real barnburner here!  Chiefs have been tough against some good opponents.

The Old Timer says: BENGALS -3.  Cinci had a decent second half.

BALTIMORE RAVENS -11.5 vs. Jacksonville Jaguars

The Kid says: Baltimore.  Ravens are just NASTY on defense, and now they have a better than decent offense to go with it.  I don’t think they could have guessed what they were getting when they drafted Flacco, but the rookie has looked wise beyond his years in the last six weeks or so.  Baltimore needs this game to make the playoffs, and you can expect them to get it big.

The ‘Cane says: Jax.  Ravens’ offense is improving, but not enough to give anybody double digits.

The Old Timer says: BALT. -11.5.  Jags are very disappointing.

Tennessee Titans -3 at INDIANAPOLIS COLTS

The Kid says: Titans.  Tony Dungy has a history of sitting his star players in the last game of the season when it doesn’t impact his playoff seeding/chances.  This is one of those games, so don’t expect Peyton, Reggie, and Addai past the first quarter.  I think Titans’ coach Fisher will play his starters more and wants to win more.

The ‘Cane says: Titans.  Colts are resting everyone and have made no secret about it.

The Old Timer says: COLTS +3.  I’ve been betting against Tennessee all year and have gotten clobbered.

PITTSBURGH STEELERS -11 vs. Cleveland Browns

 The Kid says: Pittsburgh.  I know they have everything clinched that they can, but I think a handful of Steelers’ FANS could beat the Browns by 10, so even if they take out some of their starters I still expect Pittsburgh to win the game easily.

The ‘Cane says: Browns.  Steelers have made a habit out of playing close games.  Even the backwards Browns should be able to keep it within 11.

The Old Timer says: PITT -11

NEW YORK JETS -3 vs. Miami Dolphins

The Kid says: Dolphins.  This is really hard for me to pick because the Jets always beat the Dolphins.  Plus, all signs are pointing to a Miami win.  These factors are shouting to me that the Jets win this game, but I just think that they are going to cough this one up.  I just think that Favre is going to try to hard and commit some turnovers that will cost his team the game.  Is there anyone outside of Jets’ fans that aren’t rooting for Pennington to walk into the Meadowlands and stick it up the Jets’ asses?  I know I am.

The ‘Cane says: Dolphins.  The Fish could easily win outright, the points are just gravy.

The Old Timer says: MIAMI + 3.  Can Favre step up?  That is the question.

New England Patriots -6 at BUFFALO BILLS

The Kid says: Pats.  Are you serious?  Do you expect Bill Belicheck to lose this game?  Not only is he awesome in December, but the Patriots need this to keep their playoff hopes alive.  New England does not lose this type of game.

The ‘Cane says: Patties.  Cassel has been one of the best stories of the year, the Bills provide no challenge.

The Old Timer says: BILLS +6

ARIZONA CARDINALS -3.5 vs. Seattle Seahawks

The Kid says: Cardinals.  I know they have looked awful recently, but I really think that they will put it all together and have one great offensive game going into the playoffs.  Warner and Company will be back home where it is warm and look for them to torch the Seahawks whose season was over after beating the Jets last week.

The ‘Cane says: Cardinals.  Arizona needs to show some sort of life after the embarrassment in New England.  We know you are in already but jeez.

The Old Timer says: CARDS -3.5

SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS -3 vs. Washington Redskins

The Kid says: Niners.  They have been playing at another level for Mike Singletary, and I don’t see them laying an egg for him when there are reports out there that San Francisco is ready to make him the permanent head coach after this Sunday’s game.  Look for the Niners to roll in their home finale.

The ‘Cane says: San Fran.  Washington has been too tough to figure out, take the home team.

The Old Timer says: 9ERS -3.  What a collapse for Washington.

SAN DIEGO CHARGERS -9 vs. Denver Broncos

The Kid says: Broncos.  The Chargers are favored by nine?  Are these the same Chargers that everyone has been pounding all season long for falling way short of expectations?  I think that Denver will win, but even if they don’t, I can’t see them winning by more than a touchdown.

The ‘Cane says: Denver.  Great game to end the regular season.  Seems like too many points to give.

The Old Timer says: CHARGERS -9