20 Things Magic Johnson Could Buy With The $100 Million He Just Banked
All-time NBA great Magic Johnson sold his 105 Starbucks franchises just one day after selling his share of the Los Angeles Lakers.
So how much cash did Johnson pocket? About $100 million total.
It appears that Johnson has gone the exact opposite route of some former NBA players (Antoine Walker, anyone?) and saved his money wisely.
But what's Johnson going to do with his newfound plethora of paper?
There are all kinds of rumors out there that Johnson wants to buy the Detroit Pistons or the Golden State Warriors, but that's not happening. They've already been sold.
But there's a ton of things Johnson could buy with $100 million in cash money. Let's take a look at the top 20.
20. Buy Ted Leonsis a Dictionary
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Washington Wizards owner, Ted Leonsis, recently referred to forward Josh Howard as a "respected leader."
Seriously, Ted? Howard isn't even a leader, much less a respected one.
You need a dictionary, my friend.
19. Pay Off the Referees
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The NBA recently stated that referees will call more technical fouls this season. I honestly didn't think that was possible.
I'm dead serious when I say I wish Magic Johnson would pay off the referees so that they won't.
These referees already bring huge egos to the game. Giving them the power to call even more fouls is absolutely ridiculous.
18. Buy the Spurs a Fountain of Youth
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The Spurs are old, like almost Betty White old.
Tim Duncan and Manu Ginobili certainly have their best days behind them, but one dip in the mythical Fountain of Youth could solve all of San Antonio's problems.
17. Help Out the McCourts
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The pending divorce between Los Angeles Dodgers owner Frank McCourt and his wife Jamie has caused nothing but problems for the team over the last year or so.
Maybe Magic Johnson could come to the rescue and help settle the McCourt divorce debacle by buying a $100 million share in the Dodgers.
He might have to hang out with Tiger Woods though.
16. Pay College Players
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If the NCAA wants to prevent college basketball players from jumping to the NBA after just one season, there's a very simple way to do that: pay them.
Let's have Mr. Magic donate his $100 million to the NCAA, so they can use that money for college players' salaries.
Problem solved.
15. Teach Sports Illustrated About Timing
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Aside from the fact that the cover of Sports Illustrated features the Oklahoma City Thunder but excludes Russell Westbrook, what's wrong with this picture?
Check out Nenad Krstic, the same Nenad Krstic that was arrrested for throwing a chair in a brawl while playing for the Serbian national team.
Come on, SI. You're better than that.
14. Buy Kevin Garnett a Muzzle
7 of 20Kevin Garnett has absolutely no filter on that dirty mouth of his.
Seriously, the guy must just not care that the camera catches him dropping F-bombs five to 10 times a game.
I think it's gone on so long that the only way for Garnett to shut his mouth is if someone shuts it for him.
13. A Little Something for Cleveland Sports Fans
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There hasn't been a city in recent memory that has suffered more sports hardships than Cleveland.
The original Browns became the Ravens, the Indians have struggled, and LeBron James crapped all over the entire city in an hour-long TV spectacle.
This team needs something, anything, that will take them out of their misery. Clevelanders (is that a word?) what would you prefer Magic Johnson to get for you?
12. Take These Kicks Off the Shelves
9 of 20Apparently the one to the left is Derrick Rose's new shoe, and the one to the right is Dwight Howard's latest sneaker.
Those hideous things cost $100 a pair. I'd rather not see people waste their hard-earned money on a show that is that ugly.
Please buy 'em all, so they won't even be on the shelves, Magic.
11. Give Carl Landry Etiquette Lessons
10 of 20I wonder if Kings forward Carl Landry has ever heard of a little thing called common courtesy.
Seriously dude, you just trampled that Laker girl. At least pretend like you give a crap if she got hurt or not.
You need some etiquette lessons, sir.
10. Save Shaq's Legacy
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I love Shaquille O'Neal, and so do millions of NBA and cheesy movie fans.
But he's basically been a nomad since leaving the Heat, and he hasn't gotten much out of it.
Magic, you have the ability to stop him before he ends up playing in Canada.
9. Lift The Ban On the APL Shoes
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The NBA recently banned a pair of shoes for the first time in league history.
The league ruled that the Athletic Propulsion Labs Concept 1 shoe, with it's Load 'N Launch technology, gives competitors an unfair advantage.
Screw that. Those shoes sound awesome.
Who wouldn't want to see guys pulling NBA Jam-esque dunks every night?
8. Void Gilbert Arenas' Contract
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Aside from Barry Zito's contract with the San Francisco Giants, has there ever been a more ill-advised contract than that of Gilbert Arenas?
He might be the most overpaid athlete in sports history.
But all it takes in one stroke of the pen from Magic Johnson for the Wizards and Arenas to part ways.
7. HIV Research
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Magic Johnson is the most famous person in history to be diagnosed with HIV. Period.
And the guy somehow manages to live a perfectly normal life even though the disease has disastrous effects on thousands of other people who are infected.
Now I'm not suggesting Johnson donates his entire fortune to HIV research, but it wouldn't hurt to make a hefty contribution to his Magic Johnson Foundation.
6. Persuade the NBA to Have a One-On-One Competition
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So Kobe Bryant recently said that he could easily beat LeBron James in a game of one-on-one.
The only way we're ever going to see that is if the NBA starts holding a one-on-one competition during All-Star Weekend.
You want ratings? That's how you get them.
5. Buy an East Coast Team for Carmelo
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Look, Magic. I'm getting really tired of hearing these trade rumors about Carmelo Anthony.
So please buy a share of some East Coast team, and make the trade happen so Anthony can be closer to LaLa.
4. Get David Kahn Fired
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Magic, you have the power to end years of potential misery for Minnesota Timberwolves fans.
Throw David Kahn $20 million or so, and tell him to remove himself as the president of basketball operations for the Timberwolves.
The guy signed Darko Milicic to a multi-year contract. Someone has to stop him.
3. Get Mikhail Prokhorov a Clue
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New Jersey Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov has made all sorts of promises about the team since taking over ownership in May.
He has managed to deliver on exactly zero of those promises. I mean, his biggest moves were signing Travis Outlaw and Jordan Farmar? Come on.
Magic, help the Russian billionaire out.
2. Build a State-Of-The-Art Medical Center for the Heat
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The regular season hasn't even started, but NBA fans have already seen LeBron James and Dwyane Wade miss time with injuries in Miami.
The Heat is going to need a state-of-the-art medical facility to keep that team healthy for an 82-game season.
1. Get Ron Artest a Personal Rapping/Acting Coach
20 of 20If you haven't seen Ron Artest's rap music video "Champions," be forewarned: it's one of the most epic videos in league history.
Seriously though, Artest is not that bad. But he just looks so uncomfortable at times, and some of his lyrics are a little too generic.
He could learn a thing or two from Lil Wayne
