Britney Spears Takes Up Golf to Pass the Time and Destroy Sanctity of Sport

Britney Spears is taking up the wonderful sport of golf, making her a clear and present danger to herself and anyone within 10 yards of her and her golf clubs. 

The Arizona Republic reports one of the most bizarre stories to hit golf since Tiger Woods last tried to convince us he would win another major. 

The pop star, who is set to be a judge on the US version of X Factor, was persuaded by her fiancé Jason Trawick to take up the sport. His reasoning was as ridiculous as any part of this story. He thought it might be a relaxing outlet for the singer. 

Um, has the man ever played this fine sport that should be called "I'll Take a Mulligan"? There is absolutely nothing relaxing about golf, even when you are great at the sport. Just ask Tiger Woods if you don't believe me. 

So, you can see how therapeutic this mess can be when you suck at swinging the clubs, like Spears does. Here is a telling portion of the report:

"

However, fellow golfers have been struggling to deal with Britney's inability to play the game as she regularly lets go of her club and cannot hit the ball.

A source told The Sun newspaper: ''It's heads-up when she's around. She's hit a few golfers and managed to land balls in golf carts. But she's a good sport and laughs at herself.''

"

I want you to close your eyes and think about your weekend tee time, the one you have been waiting all week for. Now imagine that you get to the course, itching to tee off, and see Spears wailing away at a stationary and defiant golf ball. Now that is how you ruin a perfectly good weekend. 

Well, as long as she is having fun. 

The star gives us a breakdown of what she finds so captivating about the grace and grandeur of golf, via the Arizona Republic. 

"

I've just started to play golf. I really like being outdoors and there's something cool about whizzing around on a golf cart with ice-cold beers. I even have a golf outfit, which I like to wear.

"

Not only is she a danger with the clubs, but she is "whizzing" around the course in a golf cart, and she has had a few brews as well. 

I don't like spiders, heights or Large Marge in Pee Wee's Big Adventure, but I have never been more terrified in my life than I am right now. 

This may just kill the sport of golf. I say good riddance, though, because I sucked at it anyway. 

Follow me on Twitter and we can dish doglegs. 

Follow @gabezal