Penn State Football: 5 Funniest Things Joe Paterno Ever Said

Joe Paterno's coaching career is in the past, but his legacy—on, and off the field—will live on forever.

Paterno's victories, donations and human qualities will outlive us all.

His legacy also includes a ton of verbiage. He has countless, inspirational and intelligent quotes, but Paterno also cracked a joke from time to time.

Paterno was not known for his humor, but if you listened to his press conferences throughout his career, he had his own unique delivery which could make everyone smile. He loved sarcasm, and he loved to needle reporters whenever given the chance.

Here are the five funniest things Paterno said throughout his illustrious career.

The Godfather

Joe Paterno was always looked to for guidance and leadership, but that does not mean Paterno was Don Corleone.

However, Paterno fancied himself as such after Penn State's victory over Michigan State in 2009.

The Nittany Lions were 10-2, and Paterno lobbied the BCS for consideration outside of Spartan Stadium.

"What do you want me to say?" Paterno said. "Pick us. Maybe I could get on the phone and call somebody and say 'you owe me one', or 'you might find a horse's head in your bed."

Francis Ford Coppola created an epic Godfather character in the 1970s hit movies. Epic enough to maintain quotability with one of the best coaches in American sports history.

Joe Suhey's Homecoming

The video at your left captures a classic Joe Paterno press-conference moment.

Penn State was struggling on the field, and did not have a successful recent history against Illinois entering the game.

A reporter decided to ask Paterno about fullback Joe Suhey returning to play in his home state, but Paterno clearly had other things on his mind.

Sit back and listen to Paterno's sharp wit. He was always focused on winning the game at hand, and that could not be more apparent here.

President Nixon

President Richard Nixon declared Texas the national champions after the Longhorns had completed an undefeated season.

Coach Paterno took exception too Nixon overseeing his also-undefeated Nittany Lions, and decided to fire back.

"I'd like to know, how could the President know so little about Watergate in 1973, and so much about college football in 1969," Paterno said.

Paterno was a well-known political conservative, but he did not appreciate any slight directed toward his Nittany Lions under any circumstance.

The New England Patriots Job Offer

"You went to bed with a millionaire, and woke up next to me," Paterno said. "I'm not going."

That is what Joe Paterno said to his wife Sue after he turned down a head coaching offer from the New England Patriots.

The deal was worth $1.3 million and believed to hold an eight percent ownership stake as well. That amount of money was unprecedented in 1972.

Paterno had verbally agreed to the deal the night before, but his conscience forced him to change his mind the next morning.

Leaving Happy Valley proved too challenging for the iconic football figure.

Just Another Big Game

Joe Paterno coached an inordinate amount of massive games at the helm of the Nittany Lion program.

Paterno's point of view concerning the 2006 Orange Bowl proved how battle-tested Joe Pa was, and just how used to big games he had become.

"I need another big game like I need a hole in the head," Paterno said, when asked about the upcoming tussle with the Florida State Seminoles.

Paterno's demeanor with reporters was always worth tuning in for. He was incredibly focused, but he never failed to deliver a few tongue-in-cheek remarks at every press conference.