Motorsports' 11 Most Ridiculous and Pointless Fist-Fights

One of the great joys of watching professional athletes is the passion that they bring to the sport. Sometimes, however, that passion boils over and leads to the exchange of angry gestures, harsh words and, very occasionally, to trading blows.

When this happens in baseball or basketball, blood may flow and damage can be done. When it happens between motorsport participants, the whole effort seems a lot more futile.

There is something very wrong with the logic that leads an aggrieved driver to punch a competitor who is wearing protective clothing and a helmet designed to protect the wearer’s noggin from a 200mph impact.

Despite the fact that it’s unsporting, ineffectual and more likely to cause broken hand bones than damage to the opponent, it is silly and occasionally funny to watch.

Miscellaneous Motocross Dudes

Absolutely no idea who these guys are or what they were arguing about, but they got into their particular brawl with much vigour—although there's absolutely no chance of causing any harm, apart from breaking their own knuckles.

Alex Tagliani vs. Paul Tracy

The 2006 San Jose Champ Car race was not one of Paul Tracy’s best.

After taking to the escape road at Turn 6, Tracy snapped the car around and flew back onto the track—straight into the path of a hapless Alex Tagliani, who was left with absolutely nowhere to go. Both Tagliani and Tracy were forced to retire whereupon a pretty annoyed Tagliani felt the need to express his displeasure to a disinterested Tracy using language that his mother wouldn’t have been proud of.

Eventually, Tagliani’s expressions of concern hit home with Tracy, who felt the need to give his compatriot a consoling hug, which may have been misconstrued, by some, as a fight.

Donnie Allison, Bobby Allison & Cale Yarborough

Donnie Allison and Cale Yarborough put on quite a show on the last lap of the 1979 Daytona 500. As the two gave a live demonstration of the “rubbin’ is racin’” philosophy, it all went horribly wrong, and the two ended up hitting the wall and crashing out of the race.

What ensued is one of the best known fist fights in NASCAR history. Sadly, though, we didn’t get to see it all because someone thought we needed to see Richard Petty win.

Donnie and Yarborough were discussing matters at the side of the track when Bobby turned up to check if everyone was okay. Apparently, Yarborough thought that Bobby had blocked him and did what anyone would do in those circumstances: he hit Bobby in the face with his helmet. Bobby describes what ensued as the lightweight championship of the world, as the Allison boys and Yarborough decided to duke it out.

Scott Nicholls vs. Emil Sayfutdinov

I have no idea about the niceties of speedway racing, but apart from Scott Nicholls pushing Emil Sayfutdinov wide on the final turn, there didn’t seem to be much that prompted what happened next.

On the way back to the infield area, the two started a bit of push and shove that ended up with them both running into the barrier and launching into something that I would expect booble heads look like when they fight.

The cheap shot award must go go the mechanic who body-checked Nicholls as he was leaving the track.

Nelson Piquet vs. Eliseo Salazar

F1 driver Nelson Piquet was well on his way to winning the 1982 German Grand Prix when he happened upon perennial back-marker Eliseo Salazar. As expected, he breezed past Salazar on his way into a chicane. However, when Piquet turned in, Salazar went straight on, collecting Piquet’s back wheel and spun him out of the race.

Understandably livid, Piquet leaped out of his car and launched an attack on Salazar that had murderous intent, but, luckily for Salazar, lacked any real technique or impact—it was “handbags at five paces.”

After the initial attack, Piquet walked away and had a tantrum worthy of a two-year-old denied access to his favourite toy. Very funny.

Michael Simko vs. Don St. Denis

Michael Simko seemed to be channeling Bruce Lee when he decided that he was going to express his displeasure to Don St. Denis. He delivered a beautifully-executed dropkick to St. Denis’ windshield, kicking it in. Sadly, however, he didn’t think through the landing and slammed butt-first onto the track.

Not satisfied with his karate skills, Simko slammed the car with his helmet.

When St. Denis finally exited his car, the two traded windmill punches before officials stepped in to keep the two apart. It is by far the most stylish expression of road-rage in this list.

Ryan Villopoto vs. Jason Lawrence

Ryan Villopoto and Jason Lawrence had been getting in each other’s way during practice when matters finally erupted.

Villopoto launched his bike at Lawrence, who, unsurprisingly, took exception to this and leaped on his aggressor in an inept and pointless scuffle that was never going to cause any damage—unless you count being run over by the other riders who just kept on practicing.

Michael Schumacher vs. David Coulthard

During a very wet 1998 Belgian Grand Prix, David Coulthard received a message to make sure that he didn’t impede Michael Schumacher, who was about to lap him. After holding Schumacher up for a couple of corners, Coulthard eased off on a straight to let Schumacher pass.

Unfortunately, Coulthard stayed on the racing line and, unable to see him in the spray, Schumacher slammed into the back of Coulthard’s McLaren and took the front wheel off his Ferrari. After both drivers limped back to the pits, Schumacher stormed down to the McLaren pits to let Coulthard know what he thought about him.

Jeff Gordon vs. Jeff Burton

Every now and then, an accident occurs that is really difficult to explain. Such was the case with Jeff Gordon and Jeff Burton at the 2010 AAA Texas 500.

Burton wanted to express his displeasure at Gordon for an earlier incident and was intending to move along side of him under caution to explain his issues. In his haste, he managed to hook Gordon’s car and put his fellow Jeff into the wall, ending the race for both of them.

As the ambulance waited to ferry to the two protagonists back to the medical centre, Gordon decided that he would try to make the trip worthwhile for Burton and launched a number of completely ineffectual blows before Nascar official stepped in with one of the more ridiculous-looking blocking manoeuvres to keep the two apart.

JC Fransen vs. Chris Bingham

JC Fransen and Chris Bingham obviously got together somehow in this Grand Am race in Mexico City, and when they were finally able to get out of their respective cars, they got into a rumble that made up in vigour for what it lacked in finesse.

What makes this video special is the commentary that accompanied i, and the classic line “hit ‘em with the fire bottle.” Wonderful stuff.

Kasey Kahne’s Pit Crew vs. Tony Stewart’s Pit Crew

Kasey Kahne’s pit crew took exception to the fact that Tony Stewart managed to nudge Kahne’s car into the wall on the restart, taking out quite a few cars along the way.

When the pit crews had finished exchanging pleasantries, they decided to take it up a notch and exchange punches.

What the fight lacked in technique and impact, it made up for with numbers. As usual, only egos got hurt.