Smoke and Mirrors: WWE Armageddon Fallout

In what only can be described as a debacle of sports entertainment, the WWE hosted its final pay-per-view event of the year. What was supposed to be a night of awe and excitement ended in controversy and scrutiny.

Guess the Steelers weren't the only ones feeling robbed yesterday...

Honestly, I won't be surprised if the ratings for last night's event come back dismal at best.

But in any event, it happened. And here's the rundown:

 
Rey Mysterio defeats MVP via Countout

It was a good start to a bad night as the human highlight reel took on Smackdown's Franchise player for the United States Championship. Mysterio came firing out of the gates, as he used his high flying style to keep Porter at bay.

But his high flying style nearly cost him, as he timed a springboard wrong and looked to reinjure his surgically repaired left knee. MVP capitalized on the mistake, with a slew of offensive moves targeting Mysterio's head and neck. But once again, Mr. 619 persevered through the pain, and was prepared to hit his patented 619 for the win.

Unfortunately, MVP slid out the ring, grabbed his title, and started walking towards the entranceway. As he passed the ring, Mysterio pulled a baseball slide and knocked the lucky champion to the ground. He placed him back in the ring and hit the 619 on Porter.

Though victorious via countout, Mysterio left a lasting message to the champion that this war between the two is far from over. Expect more fireworks on SmackDown this Friday night.

 
Mark Henry and Big Daddy V defeat CM Punk and Kane

In literal battle of juggernauts, the tag team monstrosity of Henry and V practically dominated the entire match.

Punk pulled out all the stops to try to gain an advantage over the 400 and over 500 pounders. Kane dug into his old school arsenal to help out in the melee—but the equalizer of this match was both size and Stryker.

Matt Stryker, who shouldn't even be in the same arena as real WWE fans, did everything in his power to make sure that his tag team behemouths walked out of Pittsburgh with the win. As Kane battled Henry on the outside, that left Punk and Big Daddy on the inside.

Punk attempted a springboard cross body, but all he got was a grasp from V and a Big Daddy Drop for his trouble. After the victory, the two giants left the ring with a smile on their faces, as CM Punk was left beaten and battered in the center of the ring.

Though they got the victory, sooner or later, one of them will be eyeing Punk's ECW Championship.

Shawn Michaels defeats Mr. Kennedy

In one of the most anticipated matches of the evening, Mr. Kennedy went one-on-one with the showstopper.

HBK looked more confident in this match, as he took it to the Green Bay Gawker. Throughout the match, Kennedy targeted Michaels' back while HBK kept his eyes on Kennedy's left shoulder and hand.

The match spilled both outside and inside as the two left it all in the ring. But all it took was one mistake by Kennedy to send Shawn to the top rope for his Showstopper Elbow Drop.

Anyone who knows HBK knows what comes after that. Shawn however came up short, and got caught in Kennedy's grasp once again.

Kennedy dropped Michaels with his Green Bay Plunge and came one second short of scoring the upset. Kennedy picked Michaels up and attempted to punch him with the bad hand. While Kennedy was writhing in pain, Michaels nailed Sweet Chin Music and scored the victory.

The funny part of the match was that after it was over, Mr. Kennedy was left staring at the lights getting ko'd for his big mouth, biting off more than he could chew.

Beth Phoenix defeats Mickie James to retain Women's Championship

This match left a good taste and a bad taste in everyone's mouth...or should I say ears.

Before this contest even got started, WWE's version of Will Hung, Jillian, made an appearance and proceeded to "scream" the crowd a song. Luckily, Mickie James came out before everyone's head exploded.

But it was a tall order ahead of her—in the form of the "Glamazon" Beth Phoenix.

If anyone wanted to see a bonefied catfight, this was the one to watch.

Though no clothes were ripped off in the process, it was still a pretty good match. But one mistake by James gave Phoenix the chance to end the match, as she took James up for the Glamazone.

Phoenix retained her title, and continues her reign as the Queen of the Women's Division. However, if she didn't have respect for Mickie James before, she most likely has some now.

Jeff Hardy defeats Triple H to become #1 contender for WWE Championship

Everyone had Triple H penciled in to face either Randy Orton or Chris Jericho at the Royal Rumble for the title. Not many gave young Jeff Hardy a worthy shot at a victory over the 11-time World Champion.

In fact, in the beginning of the match, the naysayers were proven right. Hardy refused to actually throw a punch against The Game...that is, until Triple H gave his own version of tough love by slapping Hardy.

So Hardy picked up the slack, and returned his own version of tough love. As a smile crept onto the Game's face, the battle waged back and forth, with Triple H having most of the upper hand. Once again, one move changed everything in the match.

After Hardy missed the Swanton bomb, Triple H set him up for another attempt at the Pedigree. Hardy flipped out of it into a reverse pin to secure the biggest victory of his young career.

After the match, even the Game was impressed with the tenacity of the Rainbow-Haired Warrior. As for Hardy, his destiny is officially set in stone: #1 Contender for the WWE Championship at the Royal Rumble.

Chris Jericho defeats Randy Orton via disqualification

This match had it all. Guts, smack talking, and ego clashing.

The fight was all Jericho from the get go, until it spilled outside. This is where things got interesting in a hurry.

As Jericho prepared to spear Orton, the Legend Killer moved aside and threw Jericho into the SmackDown announcers table and into the lap of JBL. During the altercation, Jericho shoved JBL out of the way to get to Orton.

Orton did use some pretty cheap tactics to get the upper hand, but was unable to nail the RKO during the match. As Orton prepared to punt Y2J's head off, Jericho tripped up the champion and locked the Walls of Jericho on him.

Just when it looked like Orton would reached the ropes, Y2J dragged him back into the center of the ring and applied more pressure to the hold. And when it appeared that Jericho would fullfill his quest to save us from the Legend Killer, JBL returned the "favor" by kicking Jericho's head off and causing the referee to award the match to Jericho via outside interference.

So close, yet so far.

On top of it all, Orton didn't look to be done with his opponent, as he landed the RKO after the match was already over. Orton remains on top of the RAW kingdom...for the moment.

The problem is that there are multiple people coming after him between now and the Rumble. Advice Randy: Watch your back...because the whole Raw locker room is coming to drop you on it.

Edge defeats Batista, Undertaker, Edge #2, and Edge #3 to become World Heavyweight Champion

Don't worry: I'm sober, and that's not a typo.

It took two stunt doubles for Edge to pull out the long shot victory last night. In the beginning of the match, the Deadman was only focused on one superstar: Edge.

In turn, Batista was focused on one thing: Walking out of Pittsburgh with the championship.

For brief moments in this match, it looked like Batista and 'Taker were working together to dispatch of the Rated R Superstar—but then it turned out that their animosity towards each other was too much for them to bear in a back and forth battle that was mostly fought between the Animal and the Phenom.

During the course of the match, Edge pulled out all stops to secure the win—including ringing the bell to make Undertaker believe that the match was over. But it got even more bizarre after that.

Edge suffered a pair of snake eyes, and a big boot from the Deadman that sent him to the outside. Shockingly enough, this was beginning to look like the second WWE Championship reign, which was also a triple threat match (Edge vs. Cena vs. RVD).

It turned out that Edge found the strength to climb back into the ring and attempt a comeback.

The only thing he got for his troubles was a spear from the Animal.

It didn't take long for Edge to come back into the ring to meet a chokeslam from Undertaker. After that, it came down to Batista and Taker.

Batista had the Deadman set up for a power slam until the Phenom reversed it into a Tombstone Piledriver. As the referee counted, a "revived" Edge came out of nowhere, nailing Taker with a chair, covering the dazed Batista, and beginning his second reign on top of the SmackDown kingdom.

As Edge made his way up the ramp, it became clear how many Rated R Superstars it takes to claim the richest prize on SmackDown: 3.

Three Edges celebrated up the ramp, as the Rated R Era began once again.

That was Armageddon. Told ya it wasn't that exciting. See ya next week.