Breaking News: David Arquette Wins TNA World Heavyweight Title (Satire)

As most of you know, TNA airs on a tape delay, so those of you who read this article will not be surprised about the results of Thursday's main event. 

In an effort to draw more attention to TNA wrestling, Vince Russo and Eric Bischoff brought in their old pal from WCW David Arquette to face Rob Van Dam in a surprise match for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship. This is Arquette's second world championship, having won the Big Gold Belt in 2000 while with WCW. 

When questioned about the decision to put the belt on a celebrity, rather than one of the 300 wrestlers on the active roster, Russo had this to say, "Well, WWE had that whole guest host thing. It seemed to be working for them, so we came up with a way to do what they do only better." Hulk Hogan was quoted as saying "Brother, WWE thinks they've got this whole celebrity thing down pat, look at us we beat them at their own game." 

Arquette didn't win the belt cleanly, leading most to believe that he will defend his title at Hard Justice. Arquette pinned RVD following interference from returning wrestlers Syxx Pac and Scott Hall. Our sources at the taping told us that TNA had removed the ramp leading to the ring, in favor of an elevator, which would help Hall into the ring.

Fans at the Impact Zone were less than thrilled after the finish, but Russo was quick to retort, "Again the fans come after me, what else is new" and "Look, we need an audience besides the thousand fans who show up in Orlando each week, David Arquette gives us that kind of exposure." 

The initial plan was to have the ECW faction come to Rob Van Dam's aid. However, that plan needed to be altered since Tommy Dreamer was diagnosed with a sports hernia after high-fiving a fan at ringside and Raven showing up in Philadelphia, evidently forgetting what decade it was. Matters were made worse after Stevie Richards and Rhino were denied entry to the Impact Zone after security mistook them for crazy fans.

What do you think about David Arquette's title reign? Is this move good for TNA?