Lakers Prevail in Elephant-Man NBA Finals
In what was the Elephant-Man equivalent of NBA basketball, the Lakers pulled away victorious from an ugly series last night. Lost in the roller coaster emotion of this series was the level of ugliness of the 7 games between the Los Angeles Lakers and the Boston Celtics.
Last night’s exemplified that ugliness: Superb defenses coupled with equally bad offenses. Ugly, atrocious, hideous, it reminded me of an episode of the old (Captain Kirk era) Star Trek show where they hid a certain Alien life form in a box at all times. The creature was so ugly beyond imagination; it’d drive human beings insane. It was so ugly, anyone who dared open to open the box became instantly insane.
For that very reason, it was kept in a box. (That, and probably the fact that the special effects at the time were rather elementary.)
Then again, the first three quarters of the 2010 NBA Finals could have been just as well replaced that hideous Insanity-inducing alien creature in that that box.
This is where my frustration mounts! I don’t want to hear Jeff Van Gundy, (no looker himself, but let’s not go there) repeatedly tell me about what great defenses we are seeing. Yes, we are seeing great defenses, but we are also witnessing pathetic offenses right before our eyes.
Here is what we were treated to:
- Players on both teams repeatedly missing OPEN mid range jumpers.
- Players (especially on Lakers) shooting free-throws at a measly 50% accuracy
- Kobe reverting to vintage self in first half: Forcing shots against double & triple teams.
- Rajon Rondo shooting 15-footers no better than anyone reading this article right now. (And that may be an insult to the readers. Sorry)
- Lamar Odom hesitant to take shots from the outside.
- Celtic players putting on a clinic on how to miss point-blank range lay-ups.
- The list goes on and on….
This is not a game that’d be placed on display in the museum of Modern Art anytime soon. A game uglier than watching the interlaced previews of the Karate-Kid remake where Jackie Chan has to use Kung fu (not karate, btw) to rough up 11 year olds.
No one asks the question: Why can’t these players in the Modern era make mid-range jumpers that Kurt Rambis (hardly remembered as a shooter) could even make? I supposed for the same reason no one ask why a fully-grown man needs to be a Kung Fu master to beat up 11 year olds…. But I digress.
Through out all of this, a new hero emerges. A man who we all as NBA have fan have come to accept as emotionally unbalanced and just a bit disturbed. Not disturbed enough to be in an institution, but enough that we know he is not totally sane either. I am pretty sure that he knows he is not completely right, which is probably what keeps him from being locked up. That, and the fact that he can put the clamps on a hall-of-famer named Paul Pierce.
He seems like a nice guy though. Yes, we are talking about no other than Ron Artest: The lovable crazy man ala the character Murdock on the A-Team television series (and now movie.) He is crazy but in a likable way. Think about it: Artest IS the real life Murdock: Loyal, emotional, fun, crazy and unpredictable, he allows Phil Jackson’s plan to come together. (Sorry, couldn’t resist that one either.)
He saved the day. Every single one of his 20 points were needed as Kobe shot 6 for 24, and the Lakers collectively shot the ball at 32.5% accuracy. As a fan, some part of you has to feel happy for Artest who had been heavily chastised for the past 6 weeks. He has missed more three-point shots in an entire NBA Finals run than anyone I can remember.
Yet, his three pointer in the last minute was clutch and he knew it. He knocked down the show and blew kisses to the crowd like a revolutionary new leader of a country.
Lakers emerge victorious. The last 5 minutes of the Game-7 fourth quarter change everything. Derek Fisher might be offered a new contract. Phil may come back. Kobe literally escapes from a blemish on his record that he would have never recovered from. Odom probably stays a Laker. Forgotten now is vile series that would induce vomiting if you were ever to see it again on ESPN Classics. Amongst the list of the forgotten are:
*Gasol & Kobe missing 10 free throws in Game 7
*Lakers players standing around in the 4th quarter in games 2, 4, and 5.
*Fisher’s inability to penetrate & put pressure on opposing defenses (sans game 3)
*Lamar’s disappearance
We can leave the list of “What went wrong” to Celtic fans and Boston talk radio.
The 2010 Laker players have to be credited for pulling out a gutsy victory, reaching deep down inside in the 4th quarter, to places they may have not known they had within them, to show valor and courage to pull that game out.
Lakers are the Champions and they beat the dreaded Boston Celtics to achieve it. That’s all that matters now.
Bring on the Parade.
Cameron
