Earl Nash: Planning For a "Decade Of Dominance" In a Lifetime League

It took until I was 62, but I finally found the perfect fit for my fantasy baseball habit—a lifetime league. At my advanced age "lifetime" is ironic, perhaps even foreboding.

After playing many one-year leagues and one that allowed a partial carry over, I discovered that this "one draft and done," keep all your players forever format was ideal for me, because I assiduously followed the minors and believed I could predict who would be "The Next [Hall of Famer]." (I hear you laughing...anybody interested in a few thousand Delmon Young RCs?)

The best thing about a lifetime league is that it allows me to emulate a dynasty builder like Branch Rickey (who essentially invented the minor leagues and consistent instruction on the "Dodger Way" from his D-ball to AAA affiliates), Bill Veeck (I am still looking for a midget catcher) and "Trader" Frank Lane, the Indians GM whom you could call 24/7 to wrangle a deal. (Colavito for Kuenn, sure, done!)

Here is what I learned during my first three years of my "Five Year Plan":

*  Filling your roster slots with minor leaguers will guarantee spending the entire season (perhaps decade; perhaps "lifetime," in the cellar—14th place in my league).

*  The "last shall be first" in the weekly Free Agent picks. With the other teams holding out hope for the first half of the season and grimly clutching their mediocre vets to their hearts, I had my pick of the kiddie litter every week.

*  Also, if, by some fluke, another team had a young player that fit my needs, I could usually swap my #1 FA pick for that "future star."

*  Pitchers are the most difficult phenoms to project, but you might get lucky with the future closers. (I have: "The Next Rivera" Mark Melancon, Monster Man Jose Ceda, Jason Knapp, and I hope to snag Craig Kimbrel when FA drafts start in January.)

*  Minor league shortstops have about a 50-50 chance of staying at the position when they go to The Show. (I am hoping that Tim Beckham, Grant Green, and Dee "Son of Flash" Gordon can avoid going to 2b or, horrors—OF!

*  "Ju-nebber-no." That was the answer that Jaoquin "Walking Underwear" Andujar gave to a reporter who asked him his favorite word in English. I think it supercedes Berra The Yogi's "It ain't over, 'til it's over" warning.

*  GMs who do not follow the minor leagues and recycle vets in trades will get very angry at you, when you trade a vet for a player they never heard of. They think you are trading your cow for some useless beans (Billy Beane's cow?) My best example was back when everybody laughed and said: "Who is this Derek Jetter guy?" "That's Jeeter and he's a Jedi, morons!"

*  While you can get tight range of value on veterans, the spectrum on "phenoms" runs the gamut from "never make it...4-A player" to "He's The Next [Derek Jeeter]." This disparity can work to your advantage, if your scouting sources are better, and he is undervaluing a minor-leaguer. "Jason Heyward for Xavier Nady?   Sure, I'll throw in my No. 1 FA slot for this week."

*  Rely on a source with substantial scouting data and ignore the ass clowns on the blogs. Most of the phenoms they love are on their home team or fantasy team; there's a lot of wishful thinking with no substance for support. To write on the internet, you only need internet access, not brains.

*  Retain an age cohort to assure your core team will finish first for at least a decade. Mine is currently in the low 20's; OK, at 19, I may be rushing Jason Knapp into a MLB closer role.

*  Patience. Do not get the "I can go all the way THIS year!!!" crazies. This will tempt you to go retrograde and trade your future star studs for just enough vet talent to put you over the top. Stay with your young stars and with your plan; mine is called "Decade of Domination." I "planned" to finish LAST the first two years (check!) and, if enough of my seeds sprout this year, I can hope to finish out of 14th. Next year, with all my stars aligned, I am planning to finish in the First division (maybe even sixth!). Then, with the pitchers maturing to 23-26, and Jason Knapp old enough to sit at the adult table at Thanksgiving and Melancon the new Mario, the Foolsquest Farmers will begin the "Decade of Domination." in Triple Play Sports. ([e-mail],[e-mail],[e-mail])

Or, since, "Ju-nebber-no," maybe I will live to be 100 and writing here about my next Master Plan; I've been scouting this terrific lefty shortstop in T-ball and...