The 'Sports Run Your Life' Quiz
There's no doubt that America loves its sports, though its fans come in a wide range of shapes of sizes.
The casual fan is likely the nation's most common. He can miss big games when life requires him to do so and never lets the tough times or biggest losses bring him down.
Of course, there are numerous factions of fans that are a bit more committed too. These enthusiasts can often be seen taunting opponents while wearing their favorite player's jersey.
Finally, there are also the rabid enthusiasts, who show up to games covered in body paint, flip cars after exciting wins, and destroy TVs—and other valuables—when things don't go quite as well.
With the always-growing spectrum of sports fanatics in mind, we thought up a way for sports fans to define and better grasp their overall level of passion, creating our very own "Sports Run Your Life" quiz.
To see just how obsessed you and your friends really are, simply answer the questions on the following 20 slides, add up your score and then pass the test along.
If you're honest with yourself, this can be an extremely healthy and constructive process. After all, the first step to recovery is realizing you have a problem.
So, we ask, do you have a problem?
Do You Collect Autographs?
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In a Nutshell: For as long as most of us can remember, autographs have been a major part of sports.
Some fans collect them passionately while others simply cash in on happenstance offers or opportunities.
Of course, there's also a presumably smaller faction of fans who want nothing to do with another man's signature...
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: Autographs? No thank you! I can write my name too.
3 Points: If given the opportunity, I'll grab any signature I can get!
5 Points: Autographs? Heck yeah! Not only are they sometimes valuable, but have you seen what they've done for my badass basement?
Did Sports Influence the Naming of Your Children?
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In a Nutshell: Believe it or not, many sports fans will name their kids after their favorite athletes or teams. For example, I have a friend named Ted Williams, who—as you may have guessed—is the son of a diehard Red Sox fan.
Of course, there's also that looney couple out of Texas who named their child ESPN and the committed Cubs fans who went with Wrigley.
Then there's Isaiah Thomas of the Boston Celtics, who is only Isaiah Thomas because his sports-addicted father lost a bet!
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: No way! A child's name is important, I'd rather not determine it in such a flighty way.
3 Points: I'm open to names of sports-related significance if I like them and they aren't too crazy, like Herschel or Kobe.
5 Points: I'm as crazy about sports as I am my children, so why not marry the two with a uniquely meaningful name, like Laker or Bronco?
Have You Branded Your Body in Honor of Favorite Team/Player?
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In a Nutshell: I've never been a huge fan of tattoos, but at least understand those who are, especially when they use the ink to represent or express meaningful messages.
Surprisingly, in some instances, those messages are explicitly sports related, like this Tim Tebow-inspired art or this shortsighted branding.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I don't have tattoos but, even if I did, I wouldn't use sports as my theme.
3 Points: I love tattoos and, if I found a reasonable and attractive sports-related design, I'd definitely consider using it.
5 Points: Sports-related tattoos are the coolest! In fact, I'm getting one/have one/have many.
.jpg?w=256 "Colts Jaguars Football")
Do You Spend Money on Body Paint?
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In a Nutshell: For some sports fans, rooting and hollering for their team just isn't enough. Instead, they have to support their guys through physical representation as well, which sometimes comes in the form of body paint.
Where Do You Fit:
1 Point: Paint belongs on a canvas, not my body! And who would spend money on such a thing?
3 Points: It's not a huge priority, but if someone happens to have a little paint, I'll put some on my face.
5 Points: Head to toe, there's no better way to support my team! If I'm at a game, I'm likely covered in paint.
Do You Wear Player Jerseys?
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In a Nutshell: Sports jerseys are big business and a great way for enthusiasts to support their favorite team or player.
For some fans, though, simply following the team or wearing its colors is more than enough. In the end, these supporters have far less interest in playing dress-up
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: Seriously, what do I want with another man's uniform? I'd rather root for my team in something comfortable instead of parading around in someone else's shirt.
3 Points: I have one or two, and I only wear them to the appropriate sporting events.
5 Points: I have entire collection and can't wait to get another. I'm also known to sport 'em around town.
Does Your Support Wain When Your Team Is Struggling?
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In a Nutshell: While some diehard sports fans remain committed to their teams regardless of how bad a game or season is going, others are a bit more fickle, present only when the good guys are streaking.
This reality, of course, is clearly visible when entire sections of seats are empty during "down" seasons as well as when "fans" flock to the exists in the midst of a blowout loss.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I prefer quality play. If my team is laying an egg—for the season or even just one game—I'd rather be elsewhere.
3 Points: I tend to tune out during long, painful seasons, but if I'm already at a game—blowout or not—I'm supporting my team until the bitter end.
5 Points: Though I prefer watching my guys wins, I thrive during the down years, for this is when true fans show what they're really made of!
Are You Vengeful When Slighted?
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In a Nutshell: Most fans are casual and see sports for what they really are: Competitive games that have rapidly turned into big business.
Those who are more invested, however, tend to take their sports a bit more personally.
This is never more obvious than when a popular player "snubs" a city or team. Whether it's in response to trash talk from an opponent (Hello, Joakim!) or simply a free agent's departure (Hello, LeBron!), fanatic vitriol is bound to ensue.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I take nothing personally. Sports are for fun, I watch for simple entertainment and recognize that most athletes are simply making business decisions.
3 Points: I'm passionate about my team and city. If you wrong either, I will most definitely hold a grudge, but never go too far.
5 Points: Sports are my life and I absolutely take them personally. If you're on the other team or get on my bad side, I will take to the streets, burn your jersey and curse your name!
Do You Think Your Crazy Superstitions Matter?
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In a Nutshell: Whether it's a good-luck ritual, a pre-game meal or a lucky pair of socks, plenty of serious sports fans believe their superstitions matter.
For example, during the 2000 Final Four, my party of Gators forced me to watch the second half of Florida's showdown with North Carolina alone in my bedroom, because they believed it was good luck.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I'm a realist. The players, coaches, and sometimes refs, determine the outcome of a game, not me or some silly superstition.
3 Points: I know it likely doesn't matter, but I have a ritual or two that I've stuck with for fun.
5 Points: Despite irrefutable evidence to the contrary, I believe in and am committed to a lengthy and very serious system of rituals from which I will never stray!
Do You Want to Be Like Mike?
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In a Nutshell: While some fans simply enjoy watching their favorite athletes, others have a stronger and more intense admiration for the people they are and the things they've accomplished.
Meanwhile, there's also an entirely different and even more passionate breed of fan—the "I idolize my favorite athlete" breed—who wants nothing more than to emulate and imitate their favorite sports stars.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I find sports entertaining, but athletes are people just like me, no better and often worse.
3 Points: I'm good with the person I am, but look up to and admire the most successful athletes.
5 Points: If possible, I'd do whatever it takes to be like my favorite sports star!
Do You Yell at the TV as It It Has Ears?
10 of 21In a Nutshell: In the privacy of his own living room, the average sports fan can sit back and relax while watching a marquee game or even his favorite team.
Many others, though, take a more interactive approach.
If the coach, a player, or even the ref, makes a mistake—or a great play, for that matter—this fan will let them know about it, screaming and hollering as if they can actually hear a single word he's saying.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I watch sports for enjoyment. I don't get worked up over what happens in a simple game.
3 Points: I love sports and definitely get angry at times, but the TV doesn't have ears, so why would I yell at it?
5 Points: The TV doesn't have ears? Bid deal! I'm a passionate fan, wear my emotions in plain site and, during a big game, I'm going to let everyone in shouting distance know exactly how I feel.
Do the Losses Hurt You More Than the Athletes?
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In a Nutshell: In some instances, fans actually care more about a win or a loss than some of the players themselves. It's one of the absolute toughest things to reconcile in sports because, after all, it really shouldn't be this way.
To see a crying or irate fan juxtaposed with a laughing player following a tough loss has to make one do some serious thinking.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: It's just a game. There are more important things going on in my life, so I don't let sports get me down.
3 Points: I hate to lose, and during the game I can get pretty heated, but I move on from losses fairly quickly.
5 Points: A big loss can ruin my week, while a tough season can spoil my year. Watching my team lose dramatically impacts my mood.
Do You DVR Games to Make Others Happy?
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In a Nutshell: It's fairly easy to assume that not everyone in a sports fan's life cares equally about athletics. And, at some point in time, a sporting event is going to conflict with that "other" person's plans.
Whether it's a wife, girlfriend, buddy or family member, the average sports fan will eventually be asked to compromise for someone else. It could be for something as significant as a wedding, or as basic as a Sunday movie.
I, for example, was asked to pick my wife up from the airport in the middle of Super Bowl XLIX.
No matter the reason, though, every sports fan has stared some version of this daunting dilemma in the eyes at least a couple of times.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I love sports, but friends and family are more important. I'd miss anything for them.
3 Points: I'm not about to fight with my wife or offend a friend. I'll simply DVR the game and watch it a little later.
5 Points: Are you kidding me? Who plans major events during (insert favorite team) games, anyway? I never miss a game, plain and simple.
Do You Poison Trees or Ruin Rocks?
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In a Nutshell: Some diehard fans let their love for one team manifest as hatred for another.
In most instances, such general disdain for a rival leads to basic trash talk or harmless taunting.
Elsewhere, though, it can take on more nefarious shapes. Like in the case of Harvey Updyke—the Alabama fan who poisoned Auburn's famous Toomer's Corner—whose love for the Tide led to serious jail time, or the vandals arrested in Clemson for blindly defacing Howard's Rock.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I don't have a vindictive personality, especially when it comes to sports.
3 Points: I don't like my team's rivals, but I never go any further than a little harmless trash talk.
5 Points: I can't stand my team's biggest rivals and would love the chance to vandalize the things that matter to them the most.
Do Make Exceptions for Your Favorite Athletes?
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In a Nutshell: Whether you find yourself pulling for a whiny Dwight Howard or an abusive Ray Rice, some sports fans have a way of rationalizing or even ignoring their favorite athlete's biggest shortcomings.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: Thanks to all the bad attitudes and criminals they employ, I sometimes find it hard to enjoy sports these days.
3 Points: I love sports as much as ever. I can root against certain wrongdoers while still fully supporting my favorite team.
5 Points: I am going to support the guys on my team no matter what. And if signing a troubled talent improves our chance of winning, I say go for it!
Does Your Work Suffer When Its "That" Time of Year?
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In a Nutshell: Most fans have the ability to separate daily life responsibilities from their casual sports interests.
On the other hand, many others can't help but suffer a bit from daydreaming minds.
Whether it includes doing homework and getting prepped for an upcoming NFL Draft or obsessing over recruits heading into another all-important National Signing Day, some major fans simply can't separate work from play.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: When I'm at work, I have way too much on my mind to waste time worrying about sports.
3 Points: If I have some free time, I may think about sports here and there, but rarely let it get in the way.
5 Points: When a major event is approaching or in progress, my wandering sports-centric mind often consumes my attention.
Do You Riot After Big Wins?
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In a Nutshell: Sports fans tend to deal with big wins in a number of different ways.
On one side of the spectrum there's the most casual of fans, the one who loves to witness big wins but remains his mild-mannered self no matter what.
On the other side, there's the lunatic diehard, the guy who creates and loses himself in chaos following the monumental victories.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I love big wins, but I don't do anything special to celebrate them, other than perhaps sleep a little better that night.
3 Points: When my team wins big, I'm absolutely celebrating, usually with a night filled with friends, fun and a tad to drink.
5 Points: To me, a big win equals a reason to rage. If my team wins a title, for example, I'm flipping cars, climbing streetlights and burning everything in sight.
Do You Taunt Opposing Teams?
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In a Nutshell: When attending games, fans show their love for team in a variety of ways.
While some tend stay positive and focus on the guys they love, others turn their fandom in the other team's direction, going a far more negative, trash talking route.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I'm usually passive at live sporting events, but if I make a little noise, it's usually in support of my favorite team.
3 Points: I will cheer my team and sometimes boo the opponents, but I mostly keep it tasteful.
5 Points: I will make signs and create chants specifically designed to heckle the opposing team. If I can get in their heads or, better yet, make an opponent cry, then I've done my job as world's biggest fan.
Do You Schedule Family Vacations with Sports in Mind?
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In a Nutshell: When it comes to treating your wife, husband or family to a getaway vacation, what are your biggest or most important considerations?
Do you find the destination that will make your family happiest or, instead, do you select a location and time that syncs best with a concurrent sporting event you wish to attend?
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I make my travel plans with complete disregard for sporting events.
3 Points: I pick the travel destinations that make the most sense for my family, but if we find a couple of reasonable options, I might use an upcoming sporting event to break the tie.
5 Points: Awesome sporting events do nothing but improve our vacations. I plan all of our getaways based on what sporting event we want to see next.
Do You Ever Break Property or Bones?
19 of 21In a Nutshell: Sports fans have countless ways of dealing with frustrating moments in a given game.
There's a group that takes it all in stride and quickly moves on to the next play.
There's a faction that deals with the drama by removing themselves from the unhealthy, increasingly stressful environment.
And then, of course, there's the rage-filled folks, who get a bit violent when the going gets tough.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I love my sports teams, but don't let their struggles affect my life or mood.
3 Points: When my team struggles, I may do some yelling or even get in my car and do some driving, but I rarely get physical.
5 Points: When my team fails, my heart breaks, and you better look it. I'm either breaking something or someone!
Do You Brave the Elements
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In a Nutshell: Weather often plays a major role in the live sporting experience.
It may be freezing temps in Green Bay during the NFL playoffs or intense southern heat in the middle of a long baseball season.
In the end, though, weather has a way of separating the casual fans from the fanatical diehards.
Where Do You Fall:
1 Point: I love watching games at home, especially when the weather is less than ideal.
3 Points: I can deal with a little rain or moderate heat, but would rather not mess with extreme examples of either.
5 Points: Weather can kiss my ass. I don't care how hard it's snowing or how much rain it's pouring, I never miss a game!
The Tally: Do Sports Run Your Life?
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Now that you've taken the test, it's time to define your fandom.
Simply take your answers from each slide, add up the corresponding points, and then match your total with one of the four categories below.
For the record, I scored a solid 60 points, which actually made me feel a bit better about my sometimes questionable level of sanity.
Where Do You Fall:
Less than 50 Points: You may like sports, but you aren't exactly a huge fan. You care what's going on with your favorite team, but never let it impact your life.
50-69 Points: You're a big sports fan, but only in the moment. You do a great job separating the games and major sporting events from the more important things in life.
60-79 Points: Sports may not completely run your life, but they are a major part of who you are. You do a decent job creating priorities and putting things in perspective, but only with a little outside help and motivation (from, for example, a wife or husband) and are not too far away from being completely obsessed.
80-100 Points: You are completely obsessed. Sports run your life and, really, you don't mind. You don't necessarily need a doctor, but one could probably help.
.jpg?w=480 "Colts Jaguars Football")
