10 of the Wittiest Premier League Fan Chants This Season

Joe Krishnan@joekrishnanContributor INovember 24, 2013

MANCHESTER, ENGLAND - NOVEMBER 10:  General View of Manchester United fans during the Barclays Premier League match between Manchester United and Arsenal at Old Trafford on November 10, 2013 in Manchester, England.  (Photo by Alex Livesey/Getty Images)
Alex Livesey/Getty Images

It's all very well going to a football game these days just to watch the action, but there's a certain pressure on a supporter to get up off their seat and sing their heart out.

Now, it's not just whether they chant that counts toward their passion as fans, it's the craft behind their songs too.

We've heard some odd chants over the years, and here are 10 of the wittiest chants you would have heard this season in the Premier League. 

“All we need is Shinji Kagawa, Shinji Kagawa, Shinji Kagawa.”

For some reason, David Moyes hasn't quite warmed to the Japanese star during his time at Old Trafford, and the Manchester United fans seem to be quite baffled as to why Kagawa hasn't been given a decent chance to prove himself.

To the extent that the Red Devils supporters have decided to create a chant in support of the 24-year-old as the likes of Tom Cleverley are given a run in the team.

Do the fans have trust in the Scot? From this, you'd have to say they don't.

“You’ve been hit by, you’ve been struck by...a Lee Cattermole.”

HULL, ENGLAND - NOVEMBER 02:  Lee Cattermole of Sunderland is sent off with a red card by referee Andre Marriner after a foul on Ahmed Elmohamady (down) of Hull during the Barclays Premier League match between Hull City and Sunderland at KC Stadium on Nov
Matthew Lewis/Getty Images

To the tune of Michael Jackson's hit song "Smooth Criminal," this chant says all you need to know about Sunderland's...er, how should I say it...combative midfielder?

He has seven red cards in his career and he is still only 25 years of age. He's so used to the idea of being sent off that when he was shown his marching orders by Andre Mariner against Hull earlier this month, he had already walked to the tunnel before being brandished a red card.

Sunderland fans aren't even disappointed when they witness a Cattermole red card anymore, it's just expected. The chant at least allows them to get some enjoyment out of a rather frustrating situation.

“Don’t you wish your striker was quality. Don’t you wish your striker was Benteke, Don’t cha!” (to the tune of "Don't Cha" by the Pussycat Dolls).

Southampton fans: “How s*** must you be, we’re playing Guly!”
Fulham fans: “How s*** must you be, you’ve only scored two!”

Poor Guly do Prado. He's hardly Lionel Messi in terms of stature as a footballer, but he gives his all when Mauricio Pochettino gives him a rare outing. 

When the Argentine coach handed do Prado some playing time when his side was cruising against a woeful Fulham side, the Saints supporters opted to rub salt into the wound with the song about the 31-year-old Brazilian.

The Cottagers appeared to concur that their team was poor by suggesting they should have scored more than the two they had managed by the end of the game. 

Talk about a reverse of fortunes, eh?

"He is a blue, he was a red, Torres, Torres. He hates the Kop, he loves The Shed, Torres, Torres. He used to go out on the rob, but now he's got a proper job, Fernando Torres Chelsea's number nine."

LONDON, ENGLAND - OCTOBER 27:  Fernando Torres of Chelsea celebrates scoring their second goal during the Barclays Premier League match between Chelsea and Manchester City at Stamford Bridge on October 27, 2013 in London, England.  (Photo by Clive Rose/Ge
Clive Rose/Getty Images

After becoming his club's hero for scoring the last-gasp winner against Manchester City, the famous Fernando Torres song sung by Chelsea fans (frowned upon by Liverpool supporters) was belted out at full volume at Stamford Bridge.

Rightly so, for the 29-year-old had scored a goal that could prove to be so important at the end of the season.

It's about time the £50 million striker received recognition for his efforts, and supporters certainly made their loyalties clear with a sneaky jibe aimed at Liverpool fans to go in with the chant.

"Tell me what it's like to be Tottenham,
Tell me what it's like to be small,
You sold Bale and we signed Mesut Özil, Mesut Özil"

Another case of how rivals can get one up on the other is displayed through Arsenal and Tottenham fans. For years, the Gunners bemoaned the lack of expenditure in the transfer market before the arrival of £42.5 million playmaker Mesut Ozil.

Spurs fans had to experience the agony of seeing Gareth Bale leave to join Real Madrid, and to celebrate, the Gunners teased their North London neighbours by reminding them of the Welshman's departure and how Spurs are indeed a "small club."

"Get that kid on from Barcelona,
He's must be better than that lad Kone,
Gerard De-something from Barcelona,
I can't pronounce it, what's his name?" (to the tune of "Amarillo")

BIRMINGHAM, ENGLAND - OCTOBER 26: Gerard Deulofeu of Everton in action during the Barclays Premier League match between Aston Villa and Everton at Villa Park on October 26, 2013 in Birmingham, England  (Photo by Ben Hoskins/Getty Images)
Ben Hoskins/Getty Images

Gerard Deulofeu is easy enough to type, but to pronounce it correctly is a tall order for most who don't have a grasp of Spanish or Catalan. When you're a supporter of a Liverpool-based club with a strong Merseyside accent, it's better to simply make an acronym or give him an English name, like Chelsea's Cesar 'Dave' Azpilicueta.

In the style of the Proclaimers' hit "Amarillo," the Toffees fans introduced the most vague yet brilliant song about their 19-year-old whizkid Deulofeu. 

Sing along to it, it's catchy...

"His name is Luis Suarez, he wears the famous Red
I just can't get enough, I just can't get enough
When he scores a volley or when he scores a head
I just cant get enough, I just can't get enough
He scores a goal and the Kop go wild
And I just can't seem to get enough Suarez!
Do-do-do-do-do-do-do (x8)
Lu-is Sua-rez!"

A tune from the disco days has turned into a fairly well-known football chant, and while it represents some truth about his scoring, it would be slightly odd for a grown man to say he cannot get enough of Luis Suarez.

The Liverpool man is in fine form though, with nine goals coming in just seven Premier League matches after scoring in the thrilling 3-3 draw with Everton.

With rumours of a summer move to Real Madrid continuing to circulate, per ESPN, the die-hard supporters of the Reds may need a bit more than a few cringe-worthy chants about their controversial star. 

Chelsea fans: "Jose Mourinho, Jose Mourinho!"
Opposition: "F**k off Mourinho, f**k off Mourinho!"

LONDON, ENGLAND - NOVEMBER 23:  Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho looks on during the Barclays Premier League match between West Ham United and Chelsea at Boleyn Ground on November 23, 2013 in London, England.  (Photo by Mike Hewitt/Getty Images)
Mike Hewitt/Getty Images

It's a simple aspect of the English game: Those who are successful are generally loathed by the majority.

Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho certainly falls into that category.

The Portuguese tactician is adored by Blues fans, who fondly remember his first stint at the club. He's viewed as a coach who plays mind games with his opponents.

At Stamford Bridge the fans are in full swing with their admiration of Mourinho, but whenever they are, a small section of the visiting crowd is armed with anti-Mourinho bias.

"Jozy Altidore, we know he never scores, but why, why, why?"

Sung to the tune of "Cum on Feel the Noise" by Slade, it's a way of Sunderland supporters showing their dissatisfaction at Jozy Altitdore's lack of goals since arriving at the Stadium of Light.

Equally, it's quite humorous given that the club spent £10 million on acquiring the USA international striker, with Altidore yet to score in the Premier League in his eight outings.

Highlighting the despair that the relegation candidates are experiencing, the 24-year-old will need to score soon in order to silence his critics.

Rather bizarrely, his critics include his own fans.


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