10 Randomly Depressing Wrestling Facts

Andy Soucek@Andy_SoucekFeatured ColumnistMarch 8, 2013

10 Randomly Depressing Wrestling Facts

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    Wrestling fans often enjoy when stats are brought into the sport.

    Who doesn't love The Undertaker's legendary 20-0 WrestleMania match record, The Honky Tonk Man's 64 weeks with the Intercontinental Title or Ric Flair's 16 world title reigns?

    But not every fact in wrestling can be a happy one worth celebrating. Some can make you want to pull a Big Show and just enjoy a good cry. 

    That's what this list is for, to search out random wrestling facts and oddities that may make you want to rethink your life for a moment.

    Feel free to grab a box of tissues before reading; you may need them.

    Here are 10 randomly depressing wrestling facts, Enjoy!

In 1999, the WWF Tag Team Titles Switched Hands 10 Times in 96 Days

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    From July 25 to Nov. 2, 1999, nobody could defend the tag titles.

    During the entire year, the titles changed hands 15 times, but in less than a four-month period, we were seeing new champions almost every other week.

    Long gone were the days of Demolition's 478-day run with the straps.

    The Acolytes kicked off this historic time with a 15-day run by defeating The Hardy Boyz.

    It didn't last long, as Kane and X-Pac took the straps from the two and held them for less than two weeks.

    The Big Show and Undertaker then enjoyed an eight day run before giving the belts up to The Rock n' Sock Connection for eight more days.

    During this stretch of time, The Rock n’ Sock Connection also enjoyed a six-day title run as well as a one-day run.

    While The Rock may be The Great One, he also has actually never held the tag titles longer than eight days in his five runs with the title.

Barry Horowitz Had a Seven-Year Losing Streak

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    WWE jobbers like Heath Slater and JTG have absolutely nothing on Barry Horowitz.

    On April 25, 1988, a young and promising Barry Horowitz defeated Jose Luis Rivera (who himself only had one televised win in his WWF career). One can only hope that he savored the victory, as it would be his last one for a long, long time.

    Most people would give up after losing hundreds of times consecutively, but not Horowitz. The man didn’t have an ounce of quit in him.

    Day after day, beating after beating, Horowitz didn’t stop.

    He proved that dreams can come true when he upset Bodydonna Skip on June 26, 1995. It was the roll-up heard around the world.

    Horowitz went on a career renaissance of sorts, and ended his WWF career with an impressive 8-212 WWF televised win/loss record.

Sheamus Has Wrestled More Televised WWE Matches Than Steve Austin

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    Steve Austin is one of the greatest wrestling stars of all time. From 1995 to 2003, we had the pleasure of watching him wrestle a total of 270 televised matches.

    It took Sheamus half that time to eclipse him.

    Despite debuting in late June 2009, Sheamus has wrestled 305 matches on TV and pay-per-view!

    Due to the end of the brand split last year, and the addition of Main Event, Sheamus has been everywhere.

    Sure, Austin had a couple serious injuries, but his matches were still much farther and few between. Sheamus is overexposed plain and simple.

    There's only so many Brogue Kicks and "fellas" that a fan can sit through. 

    It's not just Austin though, we've seen Sheamus wrestle more often than some of the biggest names in WWE historyEddie Guerrero (296), Mick Foley (259),  Randy Savage (196) and Hulk Hogan (191).

    Would it really kill the company to give the guy a day off?

Brian Pillman Was the First Cruiserweight Champ, Hornswoggle Was the Last

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    WCW’s Cruiserweight title had a long and troubled history.

    While it was often demeaned, it was sometimes fought over by the most exciting men on the roster, in breathtaking battles.

    On Oct. 27, 1991, Brian Pillman won the tournament for the light heavyweight title after pinning Ricky Morton, one-half of the legendary Rock ‘n’ Roll Express.

    Not a bad way to start things off.

    After a while, the division went away and was later re-branded the Cruiserweight title.

    At the Great American Bash 2007, the title effectively died when Hornswoggle captured it in six-man cruiserweight open.

    Seeing as how it ended, maybe it should have never made the jump to the WWE.

Goldust Can't Keep a Job

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    Dustin Rhodes has had a fascinating career.

    As the son of one of the all-time greats, he was given a leg-up over other wrestlers, but he also felt the pressure to deliver.

    Rhodes has had a variety of personal problems which has made him a hard guy to rely on at times.

    Because of this, he has had nine different runs with national wrestling companies.

    As of now, he has had five runs with WWE, two with WCW and two with TNA. He recently made a cameo at the Royal Rumble, so maybe he could have a 10th run left in him.

Only Two Women's Matches Have Ever Main-Evented Raw

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    On Aug. 21, 2000, Stephanie McMahon took on Lita in the main event of Raw. 

    Sure, the main focus of the match was on The Rock, Triple H and Kurt Angle, but still, the match made history. It was the first time we'd seen a women's match in the main event on WWE's flagship show. 

    The second women's match to main event Raw was Lita vs. Trish Stratus on Dec. 6, 2004.

    It's been over eight years since, and it hasn't happened again. 

    Think about that for a moment. WWE has a women’s division, they have women wrestlers, they have 52 shows a year. Yet only two of the over 1,000 episodes of Raw have ended with a women's match.

    Even Sable, who probably had the hottest run of any Diva in the company's history, never had a main-event match against another female competitor.

    Oh, and forget women main-eventing a pay-per-view.

    It’s never happened.

Hornswoggle Has More Royal Rumble Eliminations Than Tensai

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    Hornswoggle returns again for another depressing wrestling fact, as well...His character can be kind of depressing.

    Let's look at a couple of facts:

    Hornswoggle is 4'4" and 142 lbs.

    Tensai is 6'7" and 360 lbs.

    Which one do you think would be more successful at throwing another human being over the top rope?

    If you guessed the big guy, you’d be wrong!

    Whether he was Prince Albert, A-Train or Tensai, Matt Bloom just couldn’t get the job done in six different Rumbles.

    Somehow, Hornswoggle eliminated The Miz in 2008.

    Well, there’s always next year.

SummerSlam 2012 Had No Wrestlers Under 30 Competing

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    You may not have noticed, but the WWE is getting older.

    Not one single wrestler on the most recent SummerSlam card was under 30. Compare that to SummerSlam 1998, which had 12 wrestlers under that age.  

    Val Venis, D’Lo Brown, Mark Henry, Edge, Taka Michinoku, Togo, Funaki, Kurrgan, The Road Dogg, X-Pac, Triple H and The Rock were all under 30 when the show aired.  

    Look at how that paid off for them. Henry, Edge, Triple H and The Rock all became big stars.

    Road Dogg, X-Pac, Venis and D’Lo all had solid runs as well.

    This year’s WrestleMania will have only wrestlers 34 and above in the biggest roles—Lesnar, Undertaker, Cena, Punk, Triple H and The Rock.

    Besides The Shield, WWE has done a lousy job of presenting young talent for fans to latch onto.

WrestleMania 14 Had a 15 Tag Team Battle Royal

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    A 15 team Battle Royal isn't exactly depressing, unless you compare it to today.

    In 1997, WWE basically had two hours of prime time television a week, yet they were able to fill out an entire tag team division.

    WWE now has six hours of TV and doesn't have half as many teams.

    Team Hell No, Tensai and Clay, The 3MB, The Usos, The Prime Time Players, and Primo and Epico make up the entire division.

    That's six teams, five of whom are pushed as losers.

    Sure, not every team in the 15-team battle royal was great (Too Much, Bradshaw and Chainz), but the L.O.D, The Rock 'n' Roll Express, The Headbangers and The Nation of Domination were, at the very least, serviceable teams.

    Being the champion out of 15 teams is an accomplishment, being the champion out of six teams is almost out of necessity.

Half of the Radicalz Are Dead, the Other Half Almost Died

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    Chris Benoit, Eddie Guerrero, Dean Malenko and Perry Saturn.

    Four extremely talented men who were woefully underused in WCW asked for their releases and jumped ship to the WWF.

    Immediately upon their debut, they were booked as a big deal.

    The fun times didn't last too long, though. While Benoit and Guerrero eventually became world champions, Malenko retired early and Saturn fell in love with a mop.

    Then real life tragedies began to strike.

    At the age of 38, Guerrero died in a Minneapolis hotel room.

    At the age of 40, Benoit murdered his wife and son before killing himself.

    At the age of 38, Saturn was shot twice while beating up two guys who were raping a woman.

    At the age of 50, Malenko suffered a heart attack (though he was able to return to work within days).

    Another stable that has been struck with terrible luck has been The Hart Foundation.

    Three members of that group have died (Owen Hart, The British Bulldog and Brian Pillman), Bret Hart suffered a stroke in 2002, and Jim Neidhart has been arrested for burglary and contempt of court.