Primeau's Brain and Other NHLers' Body Parts That Science Should Study

In case you missed it, former Flyers captain Keith Primeau recently announced that he is donating his brain for scientific research when he dies so that experts can learn more about the effects of concussions.

When I heard this, my own brain went to work.  What other players in today’s NHL possess body parts so remarkable that they too could do the scientific community a big favor by donating said parts when they hop off for the ultimate line change?

Here are several players along with the attributes that they could donate to help science.

Sidney Crosby’s Eyes: Love him or hate him (or really really hate him if you’re a Flyers fan), Crosby’s vision is unparalleled in the game today. Sometimes it’s hard to believe he doesn’t have another set in the back of his head.

He is not the best overall player in the NHL, but he is the best passer thanks in large part to his ability to see things before they happen.

George Parros’ Fists: The Ducks enforcer has finished in the top three in majors each of the last four seasons and would fight even more if he weren’t feared as much as he is.  A study on the effects of fighting would have to include his mitts. 

As an added bonus, he should also donate his moustache to science. It may contain new forms of life.

Joe Sakic’s Wrists: The classy Sakic has long had one of the sweetest wrist shots in the game and looked like he still had plenty left in the tank until injuries caught up to him in the last two seasons.

I would have said Jeff Carter here because he has the most lethal wrist shot in the game today, but some people are probably still not convinced. So we’ll go with Burnaby Joe, who has been victimizing goaltenders since he was a teenager wearing Nordiques blue.

Zdeno Chara’s Arms: With a wingspan the size of a compact car, the hulking Bruins defenseman continues to excel even though the NHL has done everything in its power to make things more difficult for big physical players.

Sean Avery’s Mouth: Responsible for riling up opponents more than any other body part in the game today, Avery’s mouth also gets its owner in trouble over and over again and has the ability to turn a decently talented player into one that is regarded as just a pest.

Rod Brind’Amour’s Heart: It’s only fitting that an idea that started with Keith Primeau would include the man he was once traded for. Even though Primeau brought some great moments to the Flyers organization, its fans still rue the day that he was traded for Brind’Amour, the walking embodiment of a heart-and-soul player.

He captained the Hurricanes to the 2006 Stanley Cup, has won two Selke Trophies, and has amassed over 400 goals and 1,100 points. A tireless worker for two decades, Brind’Amour has put himself in the discussion for Hall of Fame worthiness.

Martin St. Louis’ Thighs: Though his numbers are down in recent seasons, it is still amazing that such a small player can generate that kind of skating strength in his legs.

The former MVP has created a solid career out of thin air, with a primary assist from the massive thighs that create so much speed and strength for him.

Alex Ovechkin’s Feet: This was a no-brainer, given the way that No. 8 is constantly dancing all over the ice.  While I’m not sure if he’s the absolute fastest skater in the league, he is definitely the most explosive and the best at changing directions.

And a few honorable mentions for various body parts of former NHLers that scientists could learn a lot from…

Bobby Orr’s Knees: Orr never met his match on the ice. Only his knees slowed down and ultimately put an early end to what could have been the greatest career the NHL has ever seen.

Scott Stevens’ Forearms/Shoulders: With countless punishing hits to defenseless opponents, no other body parts in NHL history have been responsible for dealing out so much pain.

Tie Domi’s Skull: Extremely thick, Domi’s skull was the hardest thing known to man.  Scientists could probably utilize it to cut diamonds.