The Morning Tailgate, Feb. 3: Best, Worst Super Bowl Commercials

Now that every Super Bowl XLIII commercial has been sent across the office twice-over, many have offered opinions of this year’s best and worst.

We’re not here to award the "ceremonial tailgate bratwurst" to our favorite commercial. Quite frankly, we thought most of them sucked tailpipe.

However, midway through the first quarter, a series of three ads from Land of the Lost, Doritos, and Castrol contained different variations of monkeys, and it was a proud moment for primates across the globe.

That said, we’re going to give a whole plate of sizzling weenies to the market research team in charge of gauging public interest prior to the Super Bowl. They identified that the people want monkeys.

They’re correct. We do want monkeys. Lots of them. 

It made the sub-par Super Bowl commercial a little less nauseating.

Bonus Monkey Coverage

In our list of the all-time commercial greats, we have E-Trade’s ‘99 Super Bowl commercial sitting snug at the top.

February 3

Wake Forest University is established. As far as pro sports are concerned, Wake gave us 2006 NBA Rookie of the Year Chris Paul, but more importantly, they gave us “Muggsy” Bogues, who did things like this.

Terry Bradshaw is born. And we mean the African-American who played 34 games in the outfield for the St. Louis Cardinals, not the white guy who acts like a moron on Fox’s NFL show for a living.

Darryl Strawberry enters alcohol rehab. We don’t consider ourselves fortune tellers, but something tells us this won’t be the last time.

Brian Cashman is named the New York Yankees general manager. Shortly thereafter, he is seen rolling around naked in a pile of money like Demi Moore in Indecent Proposal.

Rafael Nadal/WWE wrestler Matt Hardy

The JoeSportsFan Radio Show will be on the air on 590 KFNS in St. Louis, and via live simulcast on joesportsfan.com this Friday from 6-8 p.m. Put it on your calendars, people.

Because it’s still apparently a huge story when a high profile athlete—in this case, Michael Phelps—smokes marijuana/tobacco/what did you put in that, damn I’m high?—the headline people at Foxsports.com donned their creative caps to come up with something most appropriate.

Behold Exhibit A, found early Sunday afternoon.

Nearly 24 hours later, the headline writers reconvened after the powers that be gave one of their high-profile columnists the green light to explain why this incident could negatively impact the gold medalist.

Behold Exhibit B, found late Monday afternoon.

See there? That’s some solid headline writing, with necessary changes leading in to each story.

For the record, while we here at JoeSportsFan don’t condone the use of illegal drugs, we readily admit that we were far more appalled when we saw this. And this. And most definitely this.

The JoeSportsFan Show unveils their newest video release involving the one and only Mike Krzyzewski. He just got a new HP, and he’s pumped.

Dr. Aaron stops by to tell everyone he is eager, and willing, to give the General a phsyical if it means his prognosis calls for Bobby Knight to return to collegiate coaching.