5 NFL Stars Who Oughta Be in Pictures

Ladies and gentlemen, I am proud to report that the following rumors have been confirmed to be true:

According to various Hollywood insiders, a collection of NFL stars will be starring in a number of feature-length movies and television shows to be released this off season.

This is highly sensitive information.

It must not be shared in haste.

The players went to great lengths to keep these side projects under wraps.

But we at the Bleacher Report felt compelled to share it with you, the above average sports fan.

Vernon Davis Cries on Cue

This summer, coming to a theater near you, "The 49er's Daughter" starring Vernon Davis.

It's the story of a gold prospector in 1849 who travels out to California with his daughter to strike it rich.

The daughter, Abigail, meets and falls in love with another young prospector, Stewart Mathis, played by Vernon Davis.

The father does not approve of his daughter's love choice and a secretive, yet, passionate romance ensues between Abigail and Davis' character.

It chalks up to be the hot date movie of the summer with all sorts of crying and emotional exchanges.

Oscar nods could be in order.

Ndamukong Suh Stays Alive

He's big.  He's strong.  He's fast.  He's tough.  He's scary.

He's a tap dancer?

Ndamukong Suh to be starring in: "The Dance to Remember" to be released this summer.

Suh plays a down-on-his-luck used car salesman named Barney Jones, whose sales techniques amount to lies that none of his customers are willing to believe anymore.  

After an incident in which Suh's character loses his temper and stomps out a bug on the showroom floor, a recruiter for a traveling tap dancing company spots something in Suh's footwork.

In order to keep a roof over his head, Suh takes his show on the road in a cross between "The Full Monty" and "Staying Alive."

This heartfelt family comedy will leave audiences satisfied in the end as Suh's character learns to control his anger through the art of tap dancing and that honesty is always the best policy.

Wes Welker Is "The Little Engine That Could"

Hollywood has been trying to adapt the kid's tale, "The Little Engine That Could," for years now with very little results.

The project has been sent to that dark place called "development hell."

But recently, the project got a new spark when Wes Welker was attached to play the engine's conductor in what shapes up to be the next, hot Pixar movie.

Welker will not only contribute his voice, but likeness as well, as he leads the Little Engine That Could into the train station for that ultimate victory.

And for those of you who were curious, B/R did learn that Welker agreed to this deal before the Super Bowl and his fateful drop that did not lead the Patriots to victory.

Ray Lewis: "Attorney at Paw"

B/R has learned that the ageless wonder and future Hall of Famer, Ray Lewis, has agreed to play the part of hotshot attorney, Raymond Starch, in the new HBO series, "Attorney at Paw."

It's a show about animal justice in America.

Now the Lewis character uses his voice for the creatures without one.

But don't chuckle, this is a serious courtroom drama which features lots of yelling and screaming by Lewis.

It's a personal project for Lewis, but don't look for him to be saving any Bengals, Browns or even Dolphins in any of the episodes... it's in his contract.

We've also learned that the DVDs will feature commentary by Lewis and that no humans were harmed in any of the filming.

Tim Tebow Takes a Te-Bow

Did we really not see this coming?

Tim Tebow will not only star in, but will also direct, write, produce and distribute his own movie based on his life called, "Take a Te-bow".

The presale rights alone have already reached the hundreds of millions of dollars.

There are many in Hollywood who feel that this display in confidence for an unproven commodity is absolutely ludicrous.

Some whispers have even stated that it's the biggest mistake Hollywood has made since Gigli and Shazam combined.

No one believes in this kid.

Which, ironically, is exactly what the movie is about.