August is an interesting month to be a hockey fan. On one hand, we know that September will bring us the start of on-ice team activities and preseason games.
On the other hand, we have to make it through the roughest patch of the year. The stretch where hockey is within sight, but still just out of reach.
In an effort to help those of you in the world that are desperate for some ice action, it seemed like a good idea to share some laughs from the game that we love.
The slides that follow are 35 of the most embarrassing moments in NHL history. Criteria for selection was pretty simple, it had to be a funny that is either disgracefully embarrassing to the game or just plain funny.
I tried to stay away from being too heavy-handed with things like riots or deliberate attempts to injure, because you the reader is probably not looking for a Debbie Downer article. You want some laughs!
With that being said, I present you the 35 most embarrassing NHL related moments. If you have a good one that I missed, let me know in the comments so that everyone can check it out.
To start the slideshow, it seemed like a good idea to feature the film Sudden Death. As a hockey fan that grew up and lives in Pittsburgh, this movie will always have a special place in my heart.
Man is it bad though. This scene is just comical, as is just about every other scene in the movie and the Penguins logo.
Here we have Jean-Claude Van Damme fighting "Iceburgh", the Penguins mascot. SMH.
On an unrelated side note, since it seems like that the Civic Arena will be destroyed soon, I would like to state that no matter how it is destroyed, JCVD should be present to help start the process.
He helped save the old barn in this film. It is only right that he get the chance to destroy it.
JCVD could teach these guys a thing or two. Aaron Downey and Brad Norton take "squaring off" to new lows in this video.
I'm not sure who this one is more embarrassing for. This is not exactly a heavyweight battle for the ages.
Dion Phaneuf gets totally chumped out and then falls all over himself. Jarkko Ruutu is one of those guys that some would say is a coward for this kind of stuff. Either way, this is pretty bad.
There is more scuffle in this video than either of the last two.
The problem is one of the people involved does so at the expense of a little girl. Way to go, dude.
Well, I guess everything in the NHL is not all sticks, stones and broken bones. Sometimes it is okay to hug your problems out.
Tom Preissing and Brian Campbell are not afraid to show their softer side in this one. To each their own...
Philadelphia fans generally do not have the most pleasant reputations. In this video though, Tie Domi provokes a fan.
Nothing in this situation is right, so it is all embarrassing, but any fan/athlete incident is always a giant embarrassment in sports.
The only thing worse than this draft pick by the Senators was the fact that I bought a number 91 Alexandre Daigle Sens jersey.
Seems like there is egg on both of our faces.
This one is pretty simple.
Just Zack Storini getting his stick stuck in Rollie the Goalie's skate. It has to be difficult to try and play this off.
Skate troubles are always embarrassing and in this one, Alexei Ponikarovsky has the rare misfortune of losing a skate blade.
The hobble back to the bench has to feel like an eternity.
Even worse than the last video, is when you lose your blade on a penalty shot. Nowhere to hide for poor Steven Stamkos on this one.
Guess that giant contract will have to get him past the embarrassment.
It takes a rare person to forget to take their skate guards off when your job involves skating. This Nashville Predators ice cleaner does just that.
Despite this one time faux pas, I am still more than willing to date her if she does not mind the Pittsburgh to Nashville thing.
Perhaps the Edmonton Oilers employ an ice crew of hotties as well. What else would explain the usually sure footed Shea Weber missing his turn around the net?
In this video, Henrik Sedin has a bit of trouble finding the net. Maybe the calibration was off, or perhaps Shea Weber came through town the night before.
When it comes to missing the open net, Patrik Stefan is probably the all-time champ. This just could not have felt pleasant at either end of the ice.
Niclas Wallin had to feel pretty low when he saw this one float off his stick and drift back in to his own net.
Keith Ballard gave this one a good effort. But the end result was pawing the puck in his own net.
Maybe this will be the worst thing we ever see Keith Ballard in this slideshow for, but I would not bet on it.
Just something about the angle that Ryan O'Byrne took on this one lead you to believe that danger was lurking. Well, it lurked right in to his own net.
When it comes to own goals, you have to set aside a special distinction for what had to be one of the all-time "gut-wrenchingest" moments for the player that scored in to his own net.
Steve Smith, this one had to hurt. Sorry man.
Goalies are no strangers to flubs. Ryan Miller gets a bit too adventurous in this clip and sends the puck in to the same net he defends so hard night in and night out.
It is probably extremely embarrassing for a team to have the opposing goalie score on you. Here is a montage of goalie goals.
Speaking of goalies, sometimes they embarrass themselves by going off. In this case, Martin Brodeur disagrees with a call and acts like a lunatic. His track record prevents him from being called a "whiner", but it is still embarrassing.
Mike Vernon loses it here and embarrasses himself by deliberately shooting the puck at referee Kerry Fraser. Little did he know, even if he hit him, Fraser's helmet of hair would have protected him.
When a guy scores on you from the complete opposite end of the ice, there's nothing to say but it is pure embarrassment. Vesa Toskala found that out the hard way one night on Long Island.
Okay, so this one is not completely NHL related, but Jean-Sebastien Giguere has spent a lot of time in the NHL. Not sure what the circumstances were here, but he seems to lose a lot of fluids in this one.
Remember when I said Keith Ballard would probably be back in this slideshow? Well, here he is.
After a goal against, he tries to take out some aggression on the goal, but unfortunately he clips his own goalie. Tomas Vokoun was okay, but Ballard again gets embarrassed by looking like a baby and hurting a teammate.
When it comes to attempts to take out aggression, one of the most embarrassing displays of all time has to be the "fight" between Marc Staal and Alexander Semin. Fighting Marc Staal is not on the top of my "bucket list", but neither is bongo-drumming his stomach.
Georges Laraque happened to be mic'd up one night during a broadcast. The microphone caught Laraque politely asking a guy to fight as if he needed help moving some furniture.
Staged fights are an embarrassment to hockey, and this is a prime example of that. Keep the passionate in the moment fights. Get rid of this crappy acting in my opinion. Hockey deserves better than this.
The Laraque video reminded me of this one. It ran locally in Pittsburgh for a car dealership and featured Hall of Famer Mario Lemieux.
This is some of the worst acting in the history of recorded video. Enjoy!
Mario Lemieux lets Sidney Crosby stay at his mansion during the season. Judging by this clip, he may also be dishing out some acting lessons on the side.
There are no words for whatever this is starring Alexander Ovechkin. No words.
Just to be clear, I am not picking on Ovie for the sake of picking on him. Tyler Kennedy has also been known to do some things that are completely unexplainable.
After the last video, it is probably best that I am not overly descriptive about the content of this clip. It is another one of those where you could probably argue both guys are embarrassing themselves.
James Wisniewski takes it a bit too far in a game, though. Whatever happened to good old-fashioned staged fights as a method of embarrassment?
Even if James Wisniewski did take it a bit too far in the last video, Sean Avery generally is not a likable guy when it comes to things he does on this ice. Here is a video where it appears that he was hit by a sniper's rifle.
There is nothing that is more embarrassing than the diving that goes on in every NHL game. This is a cleverly put together montage of divers set to the "History Will Be Made" theme.
Every NHL player, including ones on my beloved Pittsburgh Penguins, embarrass themselves and the sport when this stuff goes on. Enough already. Play the game.
Come to think of it, I feel the same way about waiting for the season to start. Let's do this already!