Hottest Sports Stories for Friday, Dec. 16
The Jaguars really should find a new line of work, Dwight Howard still wants out and Chris Pronger has a ton in common with Sidney Crosby.
Welcome to the Daily Radar, I will be your Sam Malone, but don't make me learn all your names. Leave your comments in the place marked comments.
Let's dish.
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In this edition:
CHRIS PAUL SUCKS AT HISTORY
Chris Paul was introduced as the jewel in the Clippers' crown. It was an odd moment to say the least.
Question on Everybody's Mind: Yeah, but he didn't say that the Clippers had a proud history?
Our Take: Oh, yes he did. "I'm excited to be here in L.A. with this unbelievable franchise with so much history behind it." Those were actual words that a human being with some semblance of basketball knowledge uttered. Somebody needs to take a phone booth through time.
Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 IQ Drops
The one thing that you don't want to bring up in Clipperville is history. It's all about the here and now. Even their biggest fan, Frankie Muniz, is five years old.
Deeper Dive:
Chris Paul Doesn't Care About History (LA Times)
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CHAMPIONS LEAGUE GETS THEIR DRAW ON
The Champions League draw took place putting all of Europe into a tailspin. The crazy has just begun.
Question On Everybody's Mind: So who got best of it?
Our Take: Barcelona lucked out and will get their Bayer Leverkusen on. This is like Rocky taking on Squints Palledorous.
Hype Meter: 5 out of 5 Wendy Peffercorns
This is huge, but you just can't see it over your American gut. Now if you excuse me, I have to go somewhere that Supersizing is a culinary decision.
Deeper Dive:
Barcelona Gets Lucky (ESPN)
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TURDS-DAY NIGHT FOOTBALL
I will be standing by my mailbox waiting for the refund on the two hours I spent watching this trash game. Okay, I tuned out after the Falcons were assured the win. Which was about five minutes after kickoff.
Question on Everybody's Mind: Where have these Falcons been all year?
Our Take: What a difference playing a crappy team makes. Matt Ryan was on his game but the MVP for the Falcons has to go to the Jaguars who were a little less athletic than Nacho Libre.
Hype Meter: 4 out of 5 Nachooooos
Thursday night was slower than Albert Haynesworth on a treadmill. Those of you caught inside watching the night's events missed a perfect opportunity to go Christmas shopping.
Too Perfect Tweet of the Night:
Deeper Dive:
Falcons Roll to Victory Over Jaguars (Atlanta Journal Constitution)
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DWIGHT HOWARD POUTS POLITELY
Dwight Howard intimated that nothing changes and he still wants out of Orlando. Goodie Gum Drops, I smell a disaster brewing.
Question on Everybody's Mind: How bad is it?
Our Take: Not bad at all, at least for now. Howard is pouting in the most grown-up way possible. He is committing himself to winning while screaming that he wants out with his eyes. Kind of hilarious actually.
Hype Meter: 4 out of 5 Escape From Orlandos
Howard will bide his time. But as soon as the Magic lose three-straight games, all of Orlando will look like this. The part of John Cusack will be played by Dwight Howard, of course.
Deeper Dive:
Dwight Howard States That His Trade Demand Still Stands (Orlando Sentinel)
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ANOTHER GREAT PLAYER BITES THE DUST
Concussions are a nasty business. If you don't believe it, ask Sidney Crosby or Chris Pronger. The Flyer's captain is now out for the season.
Question on Everybody's Mind: What's with all the concussions?
Our Take: Concussions have been around since the dawn of head-trauma time. It's just now, we have a better understanding of their effects. I just want to have a moment of silence for all the hockey players that played woozy for years.
Hype Meter: 3 out of 5 An Apple A Days
Pronger has been out since November, so the Flyers are used to life without their star. That doesn't make losing him for the season any easier to swallow.
Deeper Dive:
Chris Pronger Out For the Season (Philly.com)
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DAILY FUN WITH MOVING PICTURES
Because what else are you going to watch at work?
GOALIE FALLS FOR THE OL' DIPSY-DOODLE
Patrick Kane jukes, jives and then calmly places the puck in the back of the net.
Deeper Dive: Watch Blackhawks Superstar Make a Fool out of Wild's Goalie (B/R)
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WHY NO TEBOW?
One of the best bits in Seinfeld gets the Tebow treatment. Not sure how I feel about such things.
Deeper Dive: Watch "Seinfeld" Pay Tribute to Mile-High Messiah (B/R)
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EWW
Here is David Villa captured in slow motion to illustrate the magic that is...OMG, What just happened to his shin?
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DRUNK JENGA
What do you do when your buddy drinks himself into a coma? Well, you start stacking crap on his head to the enjoyment of dozens of fans, of course.
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DWIGHT HOWARD DROPS A JOINT
D12 is a mad crooner with questions dodging abilities that any politician would be happy to have. Here is Howard singing his way out of a jam...with a jam.
Deeper Dive: Watch Superman Sing R&B While Addressing Trade Rumors (B/R)
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BITS OF TID
Little bits of goodness with a chewy center.
OH, POOPS
Someone pooped in my glove was a sentence someone actually had to utter in an adult hockey league. Deadspin has the full poop scoop.
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SLEDDING FAILS
Here is a high-larious rundown of the best sledding fails. If you have more, I would love to see them.
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EDDIE MURPHY STILL GOOD FOR SOMETHING
How do you cure the Dallas Mavericks blues? If you are Dwyane Wade, you watch Coming to America to get over losing in the Finals. NBC Sports reports.
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WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND
All Times Are Eastern (unless you are in the east, then they are just times).
SATURDAY
BOWL SEASON STARTS—2:00 p.m. ESPN/ESPN3
Bowl season starts with games that you need to be absolutely plastered to watch. It starts with the New Mexico Bowl at 2:00 p.m. and ends with the R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl. Seriously, go Christmas shopping instead.
SUNDAY
New England Patriots at Denver Broncos—4:15 p.m. CBS
Some of you will get to see the majesty and wonder that is the most popular quarterback on the planet. I am talking about Tim Tebow who is apparently playing against another quarterback. The name escapes me.
New York Jets at Philadelphia Eagles—4:15 p.m. CBS
The rest of you guys will get coverage of this game which will either feature Mark Sanchez sucking, or the entire Eagles team playing horribly. It should be a blast.
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Until tomorrow, Encarnacion.
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