A DEI Fairy Tale: The Fall of the Kingdom of Earnhardt

Once upon a time in a land called the Kingdom of E, lived a great and powerful King.  This King, not to be confused with the other great King Richard, lived in the South, yet lands North and East revered and feared him. 

The King had indeed arisen from the humble beginnings of the masses to ascend to greatness.  He was expert in all things going left, especially chariot racing, which was his passion and true love.  He honed his skills and soon intimidated all around him with his prowess and winning abilities.

As with many great Kings, this one took several wives.  His first wife, Queen Latane, bore him a wonderful Prince called Kerry. 

The King’s second wife, Queen Brenda, produced his first Princess, which he named Kelly.  Queen Brenda also produced the King’s second Prince, which bore his name.  The King proudly called him Dale Junior. 

The King then took his final wife, Queen Teresa, who produced his last heir, Princess Taylor.  All of his children became important parts of the King’s noble family.

All seemed right in the kingdom of E. The King was so pleased with his royal brood and had every intention of handing down his legacy of speed and intimidation through his offspring. 

But there came a fateful day, in the final laps of one of the King’s favored chariot races, when his wheels tangled with another chariot and there was a terrible crash. 

The King perished, and his kingdom would never be the same.  Subjects all throughout the lands mourned his passing.  His Queen grieved and vowed to protect his legacy.  And his children swore on their father’s carriage that they too would take up his mantle and carry out his passion for all things going left.

It seemed indeed that Queen Teresa would lead the family in the continuation of her King’s legacy.   She became a trustee of the Kingdom of E, and all of her step-children and her own child were involved in this noble venture. 

In fact, Prince Junior, as he soon became to be known, was officially knighted as the next great chariot racer, taking over his father’s place of glory.  The adoration of all of the subjects throughout the Kingdom of E passed quickly to Prince Junior and he became the favored son.

Time passed and Prince Junior and Princess Kelly became closer and closer, working together to carry out their beloved father’s chariot racing legacy.  Even older Prince Kerry grew in his love of all things that turned left.

Yet, all was not right in the Kingdom of E.  Queen Teresa, although claiming throughout the land how much she wanted the King’s memory to be kept alive, began to withdraw and become more silent.  An avid chariot fan herself, she stopped going to the various races held throughout the land. 

She became a recluse, only coming out of the palace once or twice a year to mark the anniversary of the King’s death.  In fact, some would say that she became increasingly bitter towards all.

Queen Teresa especially began to lash out at Prince Junior.  Perhaps he reminded her too much of her lost King.  Or perhaps she had lost all interest in her King’s passion for chariot racing due to the terrible crash. 

But one thing was certain, she took all of her bitterness and sadness out on Prince Junior.  She belittled his chariot racing and gave him broken down chariots to race, ensuring his loss each and every time.  She repeatedly told Prince Junior that she “owned” him and always would, controlling every aspect of his life.

Finally, Prince Junior could take it no more.  He had to get away from his stepmother, who truly had become wicked in his eyes.  Taking Princess Kelly with him, he ran and ran, finally arriving in a new land, the Kingdom of H.  There he found a Noble Sire, who tragically had just lost his own son in a terrible accident.

Prince Junior and Sire H became fast friends.  They decided that they would work together to continue the legacies of both of their loved ones in the chariot racing world.  Prince Junior broke free of the wicked Queen and began to live his own life, thereby establishing his own reputation in chariot racing throughout the lands.

But the Queen was not yet done.  She focused her vitriol on Prince Kerry and his heir Jeffrey, the next great family hope for chariot greatness in the kingdom.  She invited Jeffrey to come and race in the Kingdom of E. 

But just when Jeffrey began to enjoy some modicum of success, she ripped the chariot away from him, and gave it to some other lowly knight in the kingdom to race instead.  Young Jeffrey was crushed and vowed that he too would get even with the evil Queen.

The Kingdom of E began to lose its glory.  While Sir Martin, one of Queen Teresa’s favored chariot drivers, decided to stay in the Kingdom, two esteemed chariot drivers, Sir Paul and Sir Mark, decided they must flee.   They too, like Prince Junior, had to find other places in the land where they could be out from under the thumb of the wicked Queen, free to live and race.

Will the Kingdom of E survive?  Will Queen Teresa break her silence and attempt to restore order throughout her land?  Or will the legacy of her beloved King pass into nonexistence and become no more?

Perhaps one day, Prince Junior might just return and rescue this most troubled land.  But until then, this tale does not seem to have a very happy ending…..

(This article was written in collaboration with one of the most honored in the kingdom of Buchanan, Prince Gary, noble spouse).

Photo Credit  Gustave Doré’s illustration of Camelot from “Idylls of the King”, 1868