NFL: New York Jets' Rex Ryan Adds to the Long List of Worthless Guarantees

"I guarantee we will win it this year." 

Once again, Rex Ryan has put a bulls-eye on the back of his New York Jets, and the 2010 season hasn't even been over for a month.

Shoot, there may not even be football next year.

It's clear Ryan wants the same Jets team together whenever the next official kickoff of an NFL game occurs, but that may not even be possible since the CBA deadline is March 3rd. 

In today's world, guarantees are thrown around like cigarette butts from a crumbling pickup truck.

It's no surprise that Sexy Rexy (yes, I'm taking that name from Rex Grossman; it just seems more appropriate attached to an overweight, egotistical large-mouth bass) has done it again, setting his team back 10 spaces before the runners even toe the starting block. 

While it's no surprise Ryan has opened his mouth and a steady stream of nonsensical garbage has spewed out, he isn't alone in being a I-don't-know-when-to-shut-up guy. Forget that; he's a I-shouldn't-even-have-the-right-to-start-talking guy. 

Below is a list of some of the worst guarantees ever offered up in sports.

1. "We want the ball, and we're gonna score."

-Seattle Seahawks quarterback Matt Hasselbeck, after winning the overtime coin flip in a 2004 playoff game against Green Bay

Not only did the Seahawks lose the game, Hasselbeck gave up the game-winning touchdown by throwing an interception to Al Harris who returned it to the end zone. This was so bad it even took the focus off the normal Hasselbeck family embarrassment, Elisabeth from The View.

2. Game Six of the 2000 Eastern Conference NBA Playoffs; Patrick Ewing guarantees a win against the Indiana Pacers 

The Knicks ended up losing 93-80, and it wasn't like Ewing lit up the box score. No, he decided to miss his last six shots, and would never play in a Knicks uniform again. Some guarantee...

3. Midway through 2007, Wyoming coach Joe Glenn guarantees a win over the Utah Utes

A number of guarantees go unnoticed. However, when you guarantee a win, and follow up this guarantee with a 50-0 loss and a 5-7 season finish, people usually remember it. These same people hold on even harder to the memory when you flip the bird to the opposing bench after the game. Oops!

4. "I'm not going to be the Alabama coach."

- Not overly terrible, but just funny considering Nick Saban offered up this tidbit a week before he left the Miami Dolphins in December 2006.

5. Courtney Paris offers to reimburse the University of Oklahoma her scholarship if OU didn't win the national championship

This might top them all. A guarantee which actually is a guarantee, something you offer up if your prediction falls short.

Let's be honest: I can say I'm going to become president of Russia, but if there's nothing riding on it, is it really a guarantee?

Paris actually put something on the line. I like that. Ownership.

It's honestly what a lot of people lack these days: ownership for mistakes and shortcomings. Courtney Paris was a tremendous basketball player, becoming the first four-time All-American in women's college basketball history.

Unfortunately, when she threw out her offer of reimbursement in 2009, she didn't realize one thing: the UConn women's basketball team had decided they wanted to win every game that season. 

Although the offer was slightly outlandish, I still like the fact that Paris put out a consequence if she and her team fell short. That shows a lot of growth, pride and accountability, especially for a college athlete. 

Rex Ryan could learn something here. Put a price tag on your guarantee. If you guarantee you're going to win it all this year, then you should quit your job if you don't.

After all, it's only a guarantee if there's no safety net underneath you.