George Foreman, "Buster" Douglas and James Toney: Successful Fat Fighters

With Thanksgiving behind us, Santa Claus is obviously preparing for his annual sleigh voyage around the globe.

In honor of the lovable and portly Kris Kringle, I decided to rank the three plumpest boxers who found the most success in the ring over the past 25 years.

Without further adieu, below are my nominations:

1) “Big” George Foreman: Foreman (76-5, 68 KOs) was a physical specimen as a youngster when he won a gold medal at the 1968 Olympics in Mexico City.

He maintained his muscular physique after his triumph in “The City of Palaces” and he decided to turn professional.

In January 1973, Foreman brutalized a previously unbeaten Joe Frazier by second round TKO to capture the WBC and WBA heavyweight titles.

Foreman, named one of the 25 greatest fighters of all-time by Ring Magazine, pulverized two more opponents until Muhammad Ali shockingly knocked him out in Zaire in October 1974.

“Big George” continued to fight until he suffered a unanimous decision loss to Jimmy Young in March 1977.

A decade later, a rotund Foreman returned to the ring to TKO Steve Zouski in the fourth round.

Foreman’s comeback culminated in November 1994 when he KO’d Michael Moore in the 10th round to win the WBA and IBF heavyweight titles.

When Foreman trumped Moore at age 45, he became the oldest man to ever win the heavyweight boxing championship.

Foreman hung up his gloves for good after he controversially lost a majority decision to Shannon Briggs in November 1997.

Since his retirement, Foreman has focused much of his efforts on his various businesses.

Particularly, Foreman has concentrated on promoting the George Foreman Lean Mean Fat Reducing Machine.

Foreman’s career as a pugilist spanned four decades and with good reason.

Foreman was once quoted as saying, “I want to keep fighting because it is the only thing that keeps me out of the hamburger joints. If I don’t fight, I’ll eat this planet.”

Thankfully for the inhabitants of Earth, Foreman had an extensive life as a prizefighter.

2) James “Buster” Douglas: Douglas (38-6-1-1, 25 KOs) possessed great skills and he  had a solid career as a prizefighter.

However, if it wasn’t for his weight that often badly ballooned, he could have been a great pugilist.

Three weeks before Douglas was scheduled to fight the undefeated and undisputed heavyweight champion Mike Tyson in Tokyo, his mother sadly passed away.

Douglas utilized his mother’s death as a source of inspiration and he entered his bout with Tyson in peak physical condition.

A noticeably fit and trim Douglas easily avoided Tyson by using his effective jab.

Douglas tired Tyson and controlled their matchup from the outset.

In the 10th round, Douglas battered Tyson with a series of powerful combinations that forced the champion to violently fall and hit the canvas.

Tyson could not regain his footing or equilibrium and Douglas was awarded the undisputed world heavyweight championship as a 42-1 underdog.

10 months after his epic upset victory over Tyson, Douglas agreed to defend his title against Evander Holyfield.

Douglas trained like a food critic and he entered his prizefight with Holyfield at 241 pounds (more than 15 pounds heavier than he was in his February 1990 fight with Tyson).

Predictably, the tubby Douglas was flattened by Holyfield and he surrendered his crowns after suffering a pathetic third round knockout loss to the challenger.

It was reported that Douglas received approximately $24.6 million to get shellacked by Holyfield.

Douglas chose to live off of that wealth and his weight bulged to a grotesque 400 pounds.

If Douglas could have stayed in the gym and away from the fridge, he could have been  great.

Sadly for Douglas, he picked gluttony over exercise.

3) James “Lights Out” Toney: Toney (72-6-3-2, 44 KOs) is a rugged and quick fighter who is tremendous defensively.

However, Toney is also particularly adept at scouring buffet tables of all available foods.

Toney was an accomplished middleweight who always insisted he would eventually compete at the heavyweight level.

Thanks to ample portions of food and illegal steroids, Toney escalated in classes, defeating John Ruiz in April 2005 by a unanimous decision to “earn” the WBA heavyweight championship.

Toney had little time to celebrate his conquest.

Less than a month after his accomplishment, it was reported that Toney tested positive for the anabolic steroid, stanozolol.

Toney relinquished his title and was banned from the sport for 90 days.

Two years later, the obese juice head yet again tested positive for performance enhancing drugs after he won a 10 round split decision over Danny Batchelder.

Toney is a fat cheater whose body resembles that of Rerun’s from the 1970’s television program, "What’s Happening!"

Instead of relying on food and steroids, Toney should have considered a fitness regimen.

As the character Terry said in the classic film "On the Waterfront," “I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am.”

Like Terry, Toney “coulda been somebody, instead of a bum.”

Unfortunately, Toney is just “a bum.”

*This article is entirely predicated off of my opinions.

There is no doubt I could have included an individual(s) who should be on this list.

I look forward to the feedback of my readers.