Election Day 2010: Mark McGwire and 10 Liars Who Would Fit Better in Congress
Here we are, November 2nd. Hopefully most of you will be hitting the polls or have already mailed in your ballot.
With that being said, the term "politician" has a connotative meeting behind it.
Most people think of politicians as dishonest people who make vague, empty promises they fail to keep or lie about past actions in order to improve the public perception. Well, it turns out there are quite a few athletes and coaches trained in such a manner.
These are 10 of the biggest liars in sports history who might also make good politicians one day.
10. Elton Brand
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Elton Brand has earned his spot on this list. In the offseason of 2008, there was chatter around the league that Elton was recruiting friend Baron Davis to come play with him in L.A. on the Clippers. Davis jumped at the chance and signed fairly early in the offseason.
Brand then did a complete 180 and signed with Philadelphia, leaving both Davis and the Clippers high and dry. Clippers fans finally thought they were going to have a team that would contend year in and year out, only to have Brand pull the rug right out from underneath them.
Brand's treachery is one of the most recent acts we have seen. His ability to convince Davis to sign in L.A. and subsequent actions would make Brand a perfect politician.
9. Pete Carroll
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Before Pete Carroll was cooking up some rebuilding potion in Seattle, he was one of the most successful coaches in USC and NCAA history. His teams dominated the Pac-10 for years and produced countless NFL players.
Amidst an investigation as to the off-field activities of former Trojan Reggie Bush, Carroll jumped ship to the NFL. The ruling on USC's fate came out weeks later, and Carroll was long gone and unpunished, leaving USC to fend for itself.
Carroll claims having no prior knowledge of the sanctions imposed. You can't fool me, coach. This was the perfect time for Carroll to leave with an improving conference and sanctions looming.
He's the most charismatic, likable coach in the NFL. Combine that with his devious acts, and he is the perfect man to run for office. Perhaps one day.
8. Mark McGwire
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To be fair to McGwire, I don't think he ever outright denied ever using steroids. He just avoided the issue. His performance on Capitol Hill was awful. Subpoenaed to speak with experience on the subject of PEDs. McGwire said little to nothing at all.
A series of "I'm not here to talk about the past"s later, and you have a former American icon going into hiding. Upon returning to the public landscape, McGwire came clean.
While I am proud Mark did finally admit his usage, his reasons were laughable. His ability to destroy and rebuild his image would fit right in with American politics.
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7. Nick Saban
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Saban is just a guy who can't seem to stay in one place too long. Throw in some charm, good looks and deception, and you have yourself the next great U.S. politician.
Saban left Toledo after just one season to become the Cleveland Browns' defensive coordinator under Bill Belichick.
After his first NFL coaching experience went by without a whole lot of success, Saban accepted the job as head coach of the Michigan State Spartans. Five years in East Lansing brought the Spartans back from previous NCAA sanctions and into prominence.
Following a 9-2 season, his best at MSU, Saban abruptly and shockingly resigned his position as head coach. He quickly severed his ties to the university and took the same position at LSU.
He led LSU to just its second national title in school history. But following his fifth year with the school, Saban jumped ship to the NFL's Miami Dolphins.
After an inspiring first-year record of 9-7 and a second-season letdown of 6-10, the Alabama head coaching position opened up, and Saban's name was on top of Rumor Hill. After calling a press conference and resoundingly claiming, "I'm not going to be the Alabama coach," he met with Alabama officials on January 1 and accepted the job days later.
Saban has never coached anywhere, assistant or otherwise, for more than five seasons.
6. Bobby Petrino
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Bobby Petrino was the latest "sexy" coach out of college to come to the pros when he left his job at Louisville to coach the Atlanta Falcons in their first season following the Michael Vick situation.
With just a 3-10 record 13 games into his Falcons coaching career, Petrino resigned in-season and was in Arkansas yelling "Pig Sooie" just days later. To make matters worse, he never addressed the Falcons players for a last time, informing them and the coaching staff of his resignation via letter.
After the incident, the players and coaches were very candid in their distaste for the coach's decision. His ability to leave a situation looking like that and end up back in contention at an SEC school shows how good of a politician he would be.
5. Brett Favre
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To be fair, I don't exactly consider Favre a liar. He's more fickle than anything else, but that puts him in a class with countless flip-flopping politicians who cater to people's wants more than their own beliefs.
Favre is one of the greatest quarterbacks in NFL history, and for someone who has taken so many chances on the field, it should be no surprise he never wants to leave it.
Although his recent off-field inquiries could change my mind, Favre's deception is the least ill-intentioned. After all, he just wants to keep playing football.
4. Roger Clemens
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Roger, Roger, Roger—all you had to do was keep your mouth shut and none of this would have happened.
As with many players from the '90s and 2000s, Clemens has been accused of using certain drugs to enhance his on-field performance. If you look at his numbers throughout his career, it should be pretty obvious when he started using.
Even his former teammate and close friend Andy Pettitte admitted that he knows Roger has used in the past. Clemens' use of the word "misremember" when discussing Pettitte showcases how fantastic of a politician he could be.
Had he not continued to deny, deny, deny, he likely would not even be newsworthy and on his way to the Hall of Fame. Instead, he is looked at as one of the sadder stories in sports today. His fall from grace is unlike most we have seen.
3. Michael Vick
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I can forgive the dogfighting probably before I can forgive the constant denial of involvement from Vick. Dogfighting was likely a product of the environment in which Michael grew up, but I don't think anyone had to teach him to lie as he did.
Vick continued to deny his involvement despite reports continuing to leak of his direct participation. Vick lied to his owner, his fans and his commissioner, who was far from merciful. Vick made Roger Goodell look like a fool for believing him, and a one-year suspension followed.
Vick's ability to rebuild his image to the point where all anybody cares about is his performance on Sunday is one of masterful sorcery. There will always be people who cannot forget, but most of us would cast a Pro Bowl vote for the dual-threat QB.
2. Marion Jones
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Jones had without any doubt the biggest fall from grace of anyone on this list.
Once an American icon winning Olympic medals on the track, Jones was involved in the BALCO investigations for PEDs. She continued to deny involvement and usage until called to the stand during her perjury trial. Jones broke down outside the courthouse, well aware of her near future of imprisonment.
I can't help but feel for her after seeing her break down into tears if for no other reason than I might have done the same thing. But the constant denial is something that falls solely on Marion. Coming clean right away would have avoided this whole fiasco.
Politicians love scandal, and Marion is definitely not without scandal. Upon her release, I hope she can rebound and land on her feet somewhere.
1. Rafael Palmeiro
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On March 17, 2005, Rafael Palmeiro was emphatic and convincing in his denial of ever using PEDs. I would have voted for him. He was a Hall of Fame lock, and after his performance on Capitol Hill, he was baseball's good guy.
"I have never used steroids, period."
That lasted about five months, as Palmeiro was suspended in August for testing positive for a banned steroid substance. Baseball's hero quickly turned into a villain and was effectively shunned from the game. The chances he gets into the Hall now are somewhere in the vicinity of slim and none.
His potential political career was looking pretty damn good right until that positive test, but my guess is he won't get many votes for anything for a long, long time.
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