Hey everybody. This is Matt King of Bleacher Report, bonafide NBA junkie and former LeBron James fan here and ready to break down "The Decision." I'll be here to give you all the important information and most of the useless information regarding LeBron James and where he'll be suiting up next year over the next couple of hours. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the circus.
**It's official: LeBron to Miami. See how the madness went down below.**
10:15 EST: Goodnight everybody. Thanks for sticking around. Say a prayer for Shelly Smith tonight.
10:13 EST: The talking heads are acting shocked that Wilbon is saying he won't win a million championships immediately. I can't listen to this any more. Thankfully, Sportscenter is coming on and giving us a completely different viewpoint than "The Decision."
10:10 EST: When LeBron first announced that he was doing this show, my first reaction was that he had to be going back to Cleveland. There was no way he would drag it out like this and publicly kill Cleveland. It was just unfathomable.
Now he doesn't even look like he cares. Welcome to villain status, LeBron. Other than the people at ESPN, most people officially can't stand you.
10:08 EST: Well, that looks like it's about it. The most dramatic, life-changing, important decision predictably was a letdown because we already knew where he was going all along. I'm disappointed. The Knicks would have been so much more interesting.
10:06 EST: LeBron's big second announcement was one we already knew: that he was donating proceeds of this show to the Boys & Girls Club. Glad I stuck around for that one.
He also got Universit of Phoenix to donate five scholarships. Because going to college will help shape your moral character. Right LeBron?
10:05 EST: I really hope that the Knicks add a couple more pieces and at least get to the playoffs. The thought of seeing the Knicks and Heat match up in the playoffs again with this new piece of a rivalry is making me giddy.
10:02 EST: THAT'S THE QUESTION THEY CHOOSE TO GIVE LEBRON FROM TWITTER? I can't take it right now. I'm going to blow a gasket. They asked him how long Obama would last in a game of horse against LeBron.
That had to be the only Twitter question that didn't swear at LeBron or talk about what an egomaniac he was.
I'm still in shock. That was awful. ESPN may have just jumped in front of LeBron as the worst part of this whole thing.
10:00 EST: From what I can tell, Knicks fans are almost as angry as Cleveland fans right now. Either with LeBron or just life in general. At least Cleveland got to enjoy LeBron, New York had to deal with Eddy Curry and the roster of misfit toys for the past three years.
9:59 EST: Who takes the last shot? LeBron just dodged it by saying the coach will decide.
9:58 EST: Jon Barry feels the need to introduce himself to LeBron. Don't worry, LeBron. I wouldn't be able to tell who he was either.
9:56 EST: Here's a picture of the burning LeBron jersey for your viewing pleasure. No video just yet. I have a feeling there will be a few of those coming.
9:54 EST: Over/under for how long it's going to take Nike to have a LeBron/Miami commercial? I'm saying one day.
9:53 EST: Bleacher Report's own Max Tcheyan has apparently never seen those Bing commercials before and keeps laughing out loud every time they come on. Just thought I'd point that out for his sake.
9:52 EST: There's another announcement coming from LeBron. Stay tuned. No reason to leave even though we know where he's going.
I'm going out on a limb here and guess that LeBron is going to announce that his new album is dropping and then thank his psychiatrist.
9:50 EST: Our first shot of a burning LeBron jersey. Think LeBron signed off on that one when he agreed to this? Also, cavs.com has a picture of Delonte West. Sticking it to LeBron in every way they can think of.
9:48 EST: LeBron was talking about how great players had other great players. Like how Jordan had Pippen. I wonder if he realized that he just became Pippen?
9:45 EST: Breaking News! LeBron just said all three will be taking less money to help be able to field an actual basketball team around them? Wow, I was not expecting that. Not surprised that he's acting like a martyr for doing it, though.
9:44 EST: LeBron is basically saying now that DeBrosh will be able to turn some random role player into Rajon Rondo. I want to hear him talk about how excited he is to play with Michael Beasley.
9:42 EST: Can we get a reaction shot of Eric Spoelstra? I want to see him pretending to be excited and not terrified that Pat Riley is going to take his job in the next 15 minutes.
9:41 EST: I'd really like for somebody to ask LeBron how he thinks they're going to put a team around him with him, Wade, and Bosh (DeBrosh) taking up 99% of the team's salary.
9:39 EST: I can't get over how egotistical LeBron is being. He's talking about how he gave his talents to Cleveland for seven years. So generous.
9:37 EST: Most sincere apology: LeBron to Cleveland or Tiger Woods to everyone? I'm giving the edge to LeBron, but not by much. He's too busy fidgeting with his earpiece to really understand what's going on.
9:36 EST: Stuart Scott just called some guy rejoicing in Miami with a LeBron jersey on a "Cleveland fan." Um, Stu, I don't think that was a Cleveland fan...
9:34 EST: I love how Chris Broussard is now completely absent. It's like ESPN used him for his sources then tossed him aside. Either that or Steven A. Smith dragged him off the set and beat the crap out of him.
9:34 EST: Miami just announced that they've also signed Delonte West. LeBron's mom has no comment.
9:32 EST: Apparently this was hard for LeBron because he's such a loyal person. I'm sorry, I'm really trying to keep my vitreol down, but it's so hard right now. Has anybody gone from loved to hated quicker than this? Even Tiger Woods took a couple of weeks.
9:31 EST: LeBron says he thinks reactions in Cleveland will be mixed. Yeah, mixed between blind rage and crippling depression.
9:29 EST: ESPN knew the whole time. They had it up on their site before he even said it.
Now LeBron is talking about Cleveland. Said this is "heartfelt." He never wanted to leave Cleveland and his heart will always be around that area. I'm glad you're getting a new challenge LeBron. I'm sure the people who plopped down money for Cavs season tickets ahead of time totally understand.
9:27 EST: It's Miami. Unbelievable. The office is going nuts. Not really, that was the most anticlimactic announcement ever after all of this.
9:27 EST: I'm horribly disappointed that there's no hats to choose from or headbands.
I WILL KILL JIM GRAY! You still a nailbiter?
9:26 EST: The major factor was the chance to win. Goodbye Cleveland. You can start your looting now.
9:24 EST: LeBron decided this morning. Talked with his mom and had changed his mind from last night to this morning. Does that mean Miami is out? Where is LeBron's mom? I have so many questions!
9:23 EST: LeBron says it's been a "humbling experience." That's the biggest lie since "I did not have sexual relations with that woman." There is nothing humble about this, LeBron. Oh, sorry, King James.
9:22 EST: What's new????? What's new??????? That's the first question? Hey LeBron, how's it going? What did you think of the Lost finale? Come on!
9:20 EST: Apparently this was all Jim Gray's idea from the beginning. Now we get to see what kind of hard-hitting questions he has lined up for LeBron. Please, please, please ask him how he could single-handedly kill Cleveland if he leaves.
9:18 EST: LeBron is IN THE CHAIR! It's the "Decision Chair" sponsored by Bing.
Okay, I made that up, but you believed me for a second, didn't you?
9:18 EST: You know what those Sports Nation polls that show the map of who thinks LeBron is going where tells us? No, seriously, I was hoping you knew. I can't figure it out.
9:16 EST: At this point, I don't give a crap about Broussard's "sources." We HAVE LeBron ready to tell us. Can't we just get the information from him? He seems like the best source we have.
9:15 EST: Ohhhhhh, Bing is "the decision engine" and it's sponsoring "The Decision." I get it!
9:15 EST: Can we go back to Shelly Smith or has she been mugged already?
9:12 EST: Outrage around the office that they're already going to a commercial. They're going to drag this thing out forever. They've got advertiser dollars coming in to think about. I mean, the Boys & Girls club has those dollars coming in. Don't forget that this is for charity. Maybe LeBron isn't such a bad guy after all.
9:10 EST: It's been ten minutes. I still don't know where LeBron is going, but I do know that the talking heads have an opinion. This is so different than Sportscenter. I'm glad it was given its own hour special and a name as concieted as "The Decision." Even the presidential election puts a year after "Decision."
9:07 EST: Hey everyone, we're looking like at The King. The King! I feel so honored. What a life-changing event. Stuart Scott is having trouble keeping his clothes on at this point he's so excited.
9:05 EST: "Not in the history of American sports has a free agent generated this amount of interest," says Stuart Scott. Yeah, thanks to you guys. We would be just as happy if LeBron gave a two minute interview saying where he was going without this ridiculous dog and pony show.
9:03 EST: Mike Wilbon looks like the only one who is ashamed to be a part of that.
9:01 EST: Did they hire James Earl Jones to narrate the beginning of this? "Simba... you're wasting everyone's time."
9:00 EST: And now, the ESPN special... "The Decision." I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
8:59 EST: With one minute to go, ESPN is reporting that nobody has any idea where LeBron is going. Glad we've been listening to you guys for the past few hours. Where are all those "sources" now?
8:57 EST: LeBron seems to be wearing purple. We're all pretty sure that indicates he's either going to the Jazz or coming to L.A. to play with Kobe.
8:56 EST: Chris Broussard is reporting that independant sources are informing him that "The Decision" will start in four minutes.
8:54 EST: I know a lot of people are giving LeBron crap for holding this in Greenwich, CT, but I think he made the right decision. Those kids need new lacrosse sticks like every other needy upper to upper-middle class kid. The sticks they are playing with now have to be three, maybe four years old!
8:53 EST: We're less than 10 minutes away from LeBronathon, LeBronapalooza, or whatever you want to call it. We were promised an answer in the first ten minutes. LeBron is walking to the Boyz & Girls Club now.
8:50 EST: I want LeBron to announce he's heading to the Clippers and then injure his knee stepping down from the podium. He deserves it for putting Cleveland through all of this, even if he decides to come back. This is just messed up.
8:45 EST: I can't figure out who I've lost more respect for - LeBron or ESPN. Both are annoying the crap out of me. LeBron for going along with all this and ESPN for hyping it beyond all belief. I mean, I knew ESPN pretty much had no soul, but even Brett Favre is watching this thinking, "Man, they are really sucking up to him."
8:42 EST: Chris Bosh's neck is ridiculous. He looks like one of the Na'vi from Avatar. If I looked that goofy I wouldn't be hauling a camera crew around with me while I made my free agent decision.
8:40 EST: They're already calling May 11 his last game in Cleveland. ESPN really is sticking it to the Cavs here. Is there any chance he sticks around? Can the fans forgive him if he stays?
I say yes, but it will take a little time. And I predict rioting whether he stays or goes. They're going to get crazy drunk in Cleveland regardless.
8:35 EST: Okay, if LeBron DOES go to Miami, nobody seems to have come up with a nickname that we've all agreed is the right now. I like The Three Big-Egos, but something tells me they won't be putting that on a t-shirt anytime soon.
I like The Big Three and The D-Leaguers, but it sounds too much like a doo-wop group, and the Celtics already laid claim to the Big Three.
Some of the guys in the office are suggesting DeBrosh. What about the Miami Threet? Or Miami-me-me? Come on, somebody can do better than that. Hit me up in the comments.
8:32 EST: Discussion in the office right now on whether or not LeBron is currently the best player in the NBA. Yes, he has two straight MVP's, but after the performance Kobe put on in the playoffs (excluding Game 7, of course), and how terrible LeBron played in these playoffs I don't think you can truly say he's the best player right now.
Maybe that's why he wants to go to Miami, so he can be the best player in the NBA, but the second option on his own team.
8:24 EST: Oh, good, as if Cleveland wasn't already on suicide watch, ESPN decides to throw the worst moments in Cleveland sports history at them. Something tells me this won't be the last time tonight.
Think they remember this one at all?
8:22 EST: What kind of backlash can LeBron expect from Cleveland if he leaves? Apparently he won't be able to live their or visit any more. Wait?? He can't go back to Cleveland? CLEVELAND??? LeBron, quick, it's not too late to change your mind!
8:18 EST: Shelly Smith is reporting that there might be rioting in Cleveland when LeBron makes his decision. I believe her. She looks terrified.
8:15 EST: I'm coming to you LIVE from Bleacher Report Headquarters. I'd say the mood around the office is a mixture of excitement, anticipation, and indigestion. We all want to know, but we're pretty sick of LeBron and his ego at this point.
I left yesterday certain LeBron was heading to the Knicks. Now it seems like Miami is a foregone conclusion. Still, there's always a chance that Cleveland or New York could pull off the upset. At this point, I'm rooting for anywhere BUT Miami. I just want to be surprised.