Sleepless in Detroit: My Thoughts on the NFC North

Looking through a kaleidoscope and hoping for a clear picture is about as clearly as I can think when I'm exhausted. When I'm stressed out, I can't sleep. When I can't sleep, I think about football. It's my happy place. These are my semi-conscious, irrational thoughts on the NFC North. Enjoy.

 

Detroit Lions

I've been a long-suffering Detroit Lions fan since I was 13 years old. Barry Sanders is gone. Herman Moore is gone. Matt Millen, Jon Kitna and Roy Williams are all gone. Bobby Layne is back. Charlie Sanders is back. Hopalong Cassidy is back. I know I say it every year, but this year I mean it—the Lions are going to the Super Bowl!!!

 

Chicago Bears

Jay Cutler teaming up with Mike Martz will bring the greatest impact to the Bears offense not seen since Martz turned Jon Kitna into a dynamic QB for the Lions. They almost won 10 games that year, except, it was really seven, but anyway...mark my words, Martz is good for them. Next year he'll be working with the Chiefs to do the same thing. We have yet to find out what that is, but it'll be special.

 

Green Bay Packers

It seems like this division is an "I'll be back" kind of group. Rod Marinelli and Mike Martz coach the Bears now, Corey Williams is now a brick in the Lions' defensive wall, and Brett Favre is playing for the Vikings...maybe. Thankfully, the Packers have Aaron Rodgers, who will finish his career in Green Bay. People will name their children after him, and their street signs will read "Rodgers Lane." He'll be given the key to the one-horse town, and will never, ever disappoint them. Does this seem like deja vu?

 

Minnesota Vikings

It seems that the Vikings are transitioning to having Tavaris Jackson as their starting quarterback since Brett Favre won't be coming back. Mississippi State has no chance of getting into the CWS, so therefore Brett will retire. Well, that's what he said. He's a man of his word. Isn't he?

I know for a fact Brett Favre is done...well, yeah, definitely 100 per cent sure. Well, mostly 99 per cent sure, but that's a very slim 1 per cent chance he returns to throw another interception in a big game. No press conferences this time. He'll just send a text message that he's retiring, or maybe a letter. The ESPN mailroom might receive it next year sometime.