Lame Reasons To Leave a Team: Picking On the Scott Rolens of the World

Thank you Scott Rolen- my inspiration. I know this is outdated, but it still works. I wanted to do a "Ten Lame Reasons...", but there are only so many lame excuses you can find to leave a team.

5.)I want my kids to have a better education in "insert city".

There aren't any major league teams in Alabama or Arkansas. Chances are, wherever the heck you play Major League Baseball, there will be a fantastic school district in that metropolitan area to place the offspring. This is not only a lame reason to leave a team, it's also an excellent way of making us resent your kids.

4.)I feel like I've done everything I need to do with this team.

Really? Is there a plane ride that involved strip poker and farm animals that we don't know about? Come now, you couldn't have possibly done everything you needed to do with this team.

3.)The fans don't like me.

There's probably a good reason the fans don't like you.

Maybe you didn't run hard to first and the outfielder dropped the ball but still threw you out.

Maybe you told a former team how much you miss them and your first choice was to stay there...and we heard you.

Maybe you refuse to sign anything, even for children who idolize you and beg. 

And if none of these instances are the case, you're apparently overly sensative anyway. So in the end, the fans trusted their instincts and you proved them right. Bravo. (*slow mocking clap*)

2.)They just won the Championship. I'm on their side now!

I'm looking at you, Edgar Renteria. How dare you leave us for the Red Sox? Not only did you jump on the bandwagon after they won, you jumped on the bandwagon that ran us over in the process!

 Although I still love Edgar and wished he had enjoyed that WS win in '06 with us, I still can't believe that he left us for them when the wound was still still fresh.

1.)I don't get along with another player or coach.

Unless the other player or coach took your wife as their mistress and sold your kids to a circus, you are a grown man capable of doing your job-in a game you love-with the amount of money you make.

I'm sure every team has douche bags, just like many work environments have their Dwight Schrutes. Everybody learns to live with it-as long as you're all productive and make your money. Am I right or am I right?