Tiger to Speak on Friday — What He Should Say

The great Tiger Woods is ending his reclusive silence on Friday to address a small group of friends, associates and hand-picked members of the media. He will be delivering a statement that is expected to address his past mistakes, as well as his future plans. Woods will not be taking questions from the media.

This will be Tiger's first public appearance since Nov. 27, when his wife beat him with a golf club. We still don't know if Mrs. Woods was upset at his dalliances with homely women and porn stars, or at the fact that several media outlets had gotten wind of the affairs and were about to go public. No matter.

Tiger's agent has made it clear that this was not a press conference. Woods, while believing that what trasnpired was fundamentally a matter between his wife and himself, recognizes "he also let down his fans. He wants to begin the process of making amends and that's what he's going to discuss."

A public flogging has not been specifically ruled out.

What should Tiger say in his statement?

"I will be returning to professional golf at tournament 'x' on date 'x'...end of statement...get a life."

Unfortunately, I fear that Tiger will apologize to the public for his private life. This is absurd.

I don't know Tiger. Neither do you. He has done nothing to hurt me...you either. Tiger owes us nothing but his best, honest effort on the golf course. Nothing more. To anyone.

This trend of athletes apologizing to the public for their private-life behavior is a very sad commentary on our society, and a direct by-product of the very medium by which you are reading these words.

The blog and twitter age we now live in gives way too many people the means to bash public figures. We pry into their personal lives and post all kinds of nastiness just to feel important or make money. Seriously, what possible good can come from digging up dirt on a golfer? Has the public benefited in some way? No, not at all. We simply got to giggle at a famous person's martial trouble.

I, for one, think it is sick. Just as sick as some jackass decided that the world needed to know that Greg Oden once texted nude pictures of himself to a college girlfriend as a teenager. Oden naturally apologized for letting down his fans, the city of Portland, his teammates, the Pope, etc... Well, the jackass got a lot of 'hits' on his website, and presumably made a few bucks off it, so I guess someone benefitted.

Tiger Woods plays golf. He was not running for president or congress. Even then, I don't think I would care where he puts his wanker. I would care about how well he does his job. In this case, his job is to play golf.

A lot of people were hurt by the dirt-digging on Tiger. Sponsors were hurt. The Golf Channel was hurt. The tournaments he missed were hurt. His wife and family were hurt. What for? Cui bono?

I say "man up" Tiger. Tell the world it is none of their freakin' business what you do off the course. Announce your next tournament appearance, then leave the room.