WWE Raw Thoughts: Be Careful What You Wish For

Sheamus?

Really? Sheamus?

Here I was, just the other day, lamenting the state of the WWE title picture and the lack of originality with title matches. I said that it was time to open up the main event to new blood, to build up some new heels on Raw to challenge John Cena for the title.

From what we saw on Raw last night, based on Jesse Ventura's suspiciously shoot-like comments and the show's results, the WWE agreed.

To some extent, it was obvious what creative was trying to do with Team Miz at Survivor Series: take a group of young, up-and-coming heel performers—The Miz, Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, and Jack Swagger—and put them over big to make them look credible.

Of that group, it seemed most apparent that Miz would get the nod, with possibly Sheamus as his strong-arm backup.

But Sheamus himself as the new No. 1 contender? It is someone different, true, but the situation itself is nothing new.

Has the WWE learned nothing from its previous failures?

Don't get me wrong, I actually like Sheamus. I've been following him since he's been in FCW—since then, he's certainly got a different look and accent to boot—and was always wondering when the big bosses were going to bring him up to the show, given Vince's propensity to drool over big, bad, “RARR I'M BIG AND SCARY” hoss types.

So when they brought him up, I was interested to see what they'd do with him. Naturally he'd start in ECW, where the writers would give him a character and see what he could do.

His character was someone who squashed people using generic big-man moves (who was the last big man who didn't use a kind of big boot as a finisher?) and cut generic “I am the best and I'm going to beat people up” promos.

Where's the originality? He's Irish, but the only way you'd know is because he's pale, talks funny (“Oi ahm Sheamus, and ahm harr ta conquer tha Dubya-Dubya-E!!”), and calls himself the Celtic Warrior.

Now granted, at least they haven't given him an evil leprechaun to pal around with like they did with Finlay. Though, call me an idiot if you want, Hornswoggle was awesome in his original Little Bastard role, but it's nothing groundbreaking.

Really, there's nothing new to report here. It may seem like they've given a new guy a shot at the WWE title, like many people have been asking for, but really it's the same thing we've seen over and over for years.

Bring up a generic hoss who likes to hit people and push him to the moon. Throw it at the wall and see if it sticks—especially with Cena, who's become a pro at this storyline.

The problem is, it rarely sticks.

They tried this with Snitsky and he bombed badly, then got released. Vladimir Kozlov got a similar push and fought Triple H in last year's Survivor Series title match and almost got booed out of the building, and is now in ECW.

The Great Khali was given a shot, but he was/is so bad in the ring that no one took him seriously.

Even going back to 1994, when Kevin Nash was in his Diesel character and was given the title so fast that the company almost went under with him at the top, this strategy has rarely worked.

Of course, there are exceptions. I don't think I have to explain Andre the Giant or Hulk Hogan. Then again, that was a different era, and they booked them both perfectly.

Brock Lesnar was a scary monster who got over and did very well, but then again, Lesnar had ridiculous in-ring skills for a man his size.

Big Show has always gotten main event pushes, but the fact remains that he's a decent-to-solid worker and can cut excellent promos. Umaga got really close but they dropped the ball with him, especially when they took Armando Estrada away.

But despite the successes, generic big-men like Sheamus who, let's face it, get no reaction from the crowd, have never worked. This new No. 1 contender is fool's gold.

It looks new. It sounds new. But, it's the same old thing we've seen.

Too bad.

Other Raw Thoughts

I said it once, and I'll say it again: WWE has no clue what to do with Jack Swagger.

There was no reason for him not to at least be in the battle royal last night. This guy is a blue-chip prospect, one who is far more credible than Sheamus, yet WWE can't figure out what to do with him.

I no longer know how to feel about Santino Marella. He once was an underdog babyface who people grew tired of, so they turned him heel and he became the funniest guy on the planet.

The company was forced to turn him due to fan reaction. Seriously, the man dressed in drag and got over, at which point, he turned into a useless novelty act. I give up.

How awesome was Jesse Ventura last night—when he wasn't shamelessly plugging that ridiculous reality show of his? The clips of him as a commentator were pure gold.

Plus, unless he was going off script a little, they let him go into full worked-shoot mode and make some very timely, interesting comments that I'm sure made some people uncomfortable.

CM Punk: be careful about turning into too generic a heel. Cutting “you people” promos has been the downfall of far better men than you.

Hey, remember when Triple H and Shawn Michaels were interesting, awesome performers?

Say what you want to about her, but there's no denying that Vickie Guerrero is a heat magnet. And, it seems like her promo abilities are getting a little better.