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Liver's 2009 NFL Week Seven Picks

Adnan TezerOct 23, 2009

The Liver is still rejoicing after the Longhorns’ 16-13 victory over Oklahoma last Saturday. How many millions has Sam Bradford cost himself now?

What is it with ESPN and these sexual indiscretions with female staffers? First it was Harold Reynolds then Woody Paige and now 46-year-old Steve Phillips and his affair with a 22-year-old dumpy ESPN production assistant that has turned into his own personal Fatal Attraction . He couldn’t do any better than that?

The spurned, chunky lover did a full-on Glenn Close complete with stalking phone calls and text messages to Phillips’ wife, and Facebook messages to his son. This culminated in her leaving a written letter to Phillips’ wife on her front door detailing the entire affair and crashing her car into a pole after Phillips’ wife came home to find her on her property. No bunny boiling in the pot? No kidnapping his son and taking him on a roller coaster?

Phillips must be a compete idiot considering that this isn’t his first time on this horse. When he was the GM of the N.Y. Mets in the 90s, he copped to having multiple affairs. Doesn’t he know by now that there is NO PRIVACY when it comes to these things?

These days, even if you’re a minor celebrity, you can’t get away with ANYTHING in the world of Facebook and Twitter. There HAS TO BE something in the water there in Bristol, Connecticut.

I don’t know why but I’m rooting for Bobby Bowden to end his tenure at Florida State on his own terms and not have to deal with all the crap that he’s had to over the last couple of weeks. I know they’re not a top 10 program anymore but I think 33 years on the job earns you the right to go out when you want to.

As if you needed more evidence as to why NOT to work with your wife. L.A. Dodgers owner and chairman Frank McCourt fired his wife Jamie as CEO of the team yesterday. By the way, the McCourts are also going through an already ugly divorce where both sides are fighting for control of the team. Isn’t marriage a beating enough without having to see your spouse on a daily basis?

Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger signed a bill yesterday allowing the construction of a 75,000 seat stadium in the L.A. area for a potential NFL team to hang its hat on. Don’t waste your time breaking ground on it, the people of L.A. will NEVER pay for it. That’s why the NFL will NEVER come back to L.A. No one cares enough in this town about the NFL to help foot the bill for a new stadium.

Of course it goes without saying that the following picks AGAINST THE SPREAD are for RECREATIONAL USE ONLY . Only Rick Pitino, LeGarrette Blount, Donte’ Stallworth, Braylon Edwards, Miguel Cabrera, Tila Tequila, Steve Phillips, Travis Henry, Serena Williams, Michael Jordan, Tony Romo, Richard Heene (a.k.a. Balloon Boy’s father), the Liver’s biological father (a.k.a. The Most Interesting Man in the World) and all Somali Pirates would be drunk enough to question the Esteemed Liver's picks.

Last week’s record: 6-8

2009 record against the spread: 56-34, .622 


Sunday, October 25

San Diego at Kansas City (+4 ½)
You can go ahead and call it a season for the 2009 Chargers. The offense is solid through the air but the running game is awful and the defense is getting worse each game. They would need another late-season Broncos collapse to get back in the AFC West race and I don’t see that happening with the 2009 Broncos team.

The running game, which is tied for last in the NFL, has allowed teams to pressure and blitz Phillip Rivers late in games.  Kansas City is coming off its first win and might be able to capitalize on an inconsistent Chargers defense that is fading late in games. Pick: Kansas City


Green Bay at Cleveland (+7)

Green Bay still has pass protection problems as last week’s five sacks indicated. Luckily they’re going up against a Cleveland team that has the 32nd ranked defense and the 31’st ranked offense in the NFL. Pick: Green Bay 


Minnesota at Pittsburgh (-4)

This is shaping up to be the game of the weekend as the undefeated Vikings pay a visit to the Steelers. The Vikings defense forgot there were four quarters in the game last weekend and nearly gave away the game to the Ravens. The Steelers still have problems putting teams away as they showed last week against the Browns. Four turnovers don’t help either.

The Steelers will need to be flawless to beat the Vikings here. If the Vikings can continue to mix the run with the pass effectively they should come out with an impressive road win. Both of these defenses have given up large numbers of points in the fourth quarter. Pick: Minnesota


Chicago at Cincinnati (PK)

Losing Antwan Odom for the year could have a huge impact on that Bengals defense. Cedric Benson will no doubt have revenge on his mind as he faces his former team that he says blackballed him, yet everything they said about him was true.

He HAD been arrested for two alcohol related incidents before he was cut, HAD a poor work ethic AND performed poorly on the field. As Clifford Worley (Dennis Hopper) says in True Romance , “Now, if that’s a fact, tell me, am I lying?” 

The Bears lost another game last week that they had control of and red zone turnovers are a huge problem for them. They must get Matt Forte and the running game going to keep the pressure off of Jay Cutler. Pick: Chicago


Indianapolis at St. Louis (+13)

Look for Peyton Manning to continue his hot streak against the win-less Rams. He should have no problems carving up another poor secondary. I know the Colts will be 6-0 after this game but I’m still not sure just how good they are. They’re not going to be truly challenged until the Patriots come to visit on November 15. Pick: Indy


New England at Tampa Bay (+14 ½) (in London)

I’d like to know how this constitutes as a home game for the Bucs considering that this game is in LONDON . What is the point in having these games there anyway? Oh, I forgot; Roger Goodell thinks that the NFL can travel overseas.

NO ONE overseas cares about the NFL. It’s the other football they care about.  The Pats had a 2007 flashback last week as they rolled the Titans 59-0 and could have a similar output here. Pick: New England


San Francisco at Houston (-3)

San Francisco has had two weeks to think about that thrashing they took at the hands of the Falcons. The defense is still stingy but the 29th ranked offense needs a spark. Given that, it’s no surprise that this game will see the unveiling of Michael Crabtree after his lengthy holdout.

He just might have a decent debut considering that the Texans can score with anyone but can’t stop anyone consistently. The 49’rs should benefit from Frank Gore’s return. Pick: Houston


N.Y. Jets at Oakland (+7)

This game might actually be worth a watch. Don’t hear so much trash from Jets fans or Rex Ryan lately. Maybe that has to do with Mark Sanchez playing like a rookie the last three weeks or the defense collapsing late in games.

Oakland comes in high off their upset win over Filthy last week and if the Jets defense can’t get to JaMarcus Russell early, the Jets could be looking at a four game losing streak. This game also features two head coaches in Rex Ryan and Tom Cable who look like they would be happier starting drunken fistfights in a bar. We all know Cable's in for that. Pick: N.Y.


Buffalo at Carolina (-7)

Interested in two teams going nowhere fast? Then enjoy this waste of time. The Bills won a game against the Jets last week that NO TEAM deserved to win while the Panthers barely beat a win-less Bucs team while still turning over the ball at an alarming rate. Think I’ll pull an H.I. McDonnough for this game and “slip out with the boys and knock back a couple of Coca Colas.” Pick: Carolina


Atlanta at Dallas (-4)

Atlanta is looking strong after their win over the Bears last week and could roll up the points against a Cowboys secondary that is ranked 26th in the league. The Cowboys front seven have to get in Matt Ryan’s face early and often or this could get ugly. The Cowboys got some vital players back over the bye including Roy Williams and Felix Jones.

This should be a battle of running games. If the Cowboys can get their running game back to what it was early in the season with Jones, Barber and Choice running strong, they have a chance here as long as Tony Romo plays error free and the Dallas receivers can make some plays.

If the Falcons can get Michael Turner and Jerious Norwood going and improve on their 24th ranked rushing offense; that takes pressure off of Matt Ryan. I can’t believe in Dallas until they actually beat a good team. Pick: Atlanta


New Orleans at Miami (+7)

This should be an excellent test for the Saints defense as they face a wild cat heavy Dolphins offense and strong running game. They’ve feasted on opposing QBs so far this season and Chad Henne will have to play smart in order to avoid falling on that list. Pick: Miami


Arizona at N.Y. Giants (-7)

Looks like the injuries finally caught up to the Giants secondary last weekend. The run game never got much of a chance against the Saints because they were down double digits most of the game. Remarkably, the Cardinals are ranked number one in the NFL against the run giving up only 59.6 yards a game. They haven’t faced a physical, run-heavy team like the Giants though.

Arizona has gotten wins over the Texans and Seahawks the last two weeks and is on a good roll offensively. Whether or not they can keep that up against a Giants team looking for a reprieve after last week’s Saints beating is another thing. Pick: Arizona


Monday, October 26

Philadelphia at Washington (+7)
The Sherm Lewis era begins in Washington. Sorry, but a 67-year-old guy calling your offensive plays that was calling bingo numbers at a Detroit retirement home a week earlier and has been out of the NFL for five years doesn’t exactly light my fire. The Eagles are under pressure after that embarrassing loss to the Raiders last week and could feast on a dying Redskins offense.

The Redskins do, however, have the fifth ranked defense in the NFL that is third against the pass. If the Redskins’ pass rush can duplicate Oakland’s game plan and pressure McNabb all game long, then they have a chance. Filthy’s defense is ranked fourth overall in the league so this game might actually be an ugly, grind-it-out, low scoring affair. Take the under. Pick: Filthy

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