Ranking Manchester United Players on Their Instagram Accounts

Manchester United fans care most about what their team's players do on the pitch. But footballers are humans too, and in 2017, humans have social media accounts. Especially humans with sponsorship deals and access to an audience of millions.

Having looked at whose social profiles got the biggest boost during the 2016/17 season, we're turning our attention to who does it best. Specifically, who uses wildly popular photo sharing site Instagram with the most aplomb.

Using proprietary and highly scientific methodology, we will select the top 12 United-player Instagram accounts, taking into consideration the following factors: use of their own photos rather than those taken while they play football, taste when choosing pictures of themselves taken while they play football, caption-writing quality, insight into a player's character, eye for the non-generic and number of pictures of pet dogs (this is important).

OK, it isn't scientific at all. It comes down to personal taste. But let's crack on anyway.

12. Matteo Darmian

Matteo Darmian is a quality-over-quantity man. In fact, since this Christmas tree snap was taken, he has posted just 21 more photographs—an average of under one per week.

A good percentage of them are football related, but there is some nice personal stuff in there as well—selfies on the plane, pictures with his fiancee and the all important puppy pic. Indeed, it is this most recent addition to the Darmian family, and latest picture on his Instagram feed, that gets him on to the list at all.

Well done, Matteo. Excellent timing.

11. Jesse Lingard

Eleventh place is perhaps surprisingly low for the social media-savvy Jesse Lingard. Snapchat is where he shines, though. His Instagram is a little more generic than you might hope.

He's fond of an edit, and this lovely montage of his trophy wins is the standout image. He also did one of those cool things where each picture makes up a tile of a larger picture on the front page of an account, but they look a lot less cool when new pictures get posted and bump them down the list.

If this were a Snapchat ranking, he'd be a lot higher.

10. Henrikh Mkhitaryan

Henrikh Mkhitaryan's Insta belies his sensitive spirit. Mostly pictures of him, often looking straight into a camera, he seems to be saying "come in and know me better, man." There's plenty of football too, with a particular fondness for a celebration pic. It's also entirely post-joining-United content, apart from this awesome flashback image:

The caption is pure poetry, and if he can work on adding a bit of variety—and if he gets a pet dog in the offseason—he's in with a chance of climbing the ranks next time around.

9. Ashley Young

A surprisingly high placement for Ashley Young, whose Instagram game is highly respectable. There is plenty of original content in the form of short videos and self-taken snaps. When he plays, he almost always chooses a good picture to represent the game, and the cheerful vibe of his account perhaps hints at why he has been kept around at United for so long in spite of a relative lack of impact on the pitch. He seems a jovial soul, and dressing rooms need that kind of figure.

8. Daley Blind

Daley Blind earns his spot here by being prepared to show actual real-life photos of himself and his friends and family.

It does not hurt that he has a spectacularly photogenic face, though he chose not to show that off in this lovely relaxed Valentine's Day celebratory snap.

Also, crucially, he nudges ahead of Young and Mkhitaryan because he has a dog and is not afraid to use it for easy likes.

7. Eric Bailly

Eric Bailly is great. He seems funny and friendly and to be interested in teaching Ander Herrera to dance, which is an asset to any social media account.

He is fond of a group selfie and the matchday and training-ground action shots. They are often good action shots, though, like this one of a perfectly timed and perfectly Bailly-esque tackle against Crystal Palace during United's final Premier League game of the season.

As well as the Herrera dancing video, Bailly was bumped up a place or two by virtue of sharing this video of the Stockholm celebrations with the caption "The Crutch Crew." Exactly what is he doing right at the end of this?

6. Chris Smalling

Chris Smalling's Instagram account has a secret weapon. His fiancee, Sam Cooke, is a professional photographer. This comes into its own when they go on holiday together, as evidenced by this incredible picture of Smalling enjoying a hot spring in Peru:

He also has a properly excellent dog and used it as part of a competition post, which is a superb move. His is an account well worth following.

5. David De Gea

Selfies, saves and celebrations are a mainstay of David De Gea's Instagram account, but he mixes it up with some nice holiday snaps, and he loves a caption with the lyrics to a United chant.

It's hard to quantify exactly why this is such a good Instagram account, but it definitely is. It just seems to capture De Gea's spirit nicely, and there's a sense of fun running through it. Keep up the good work, Dave.

4. Ander Herrera

An action photo of Ander Herrera going to smush a birthday cake into Juan Mata's slightly worried face is why he is fourth on the list.

The rest of the account is ace too, particularly the pre-match, behind-the-scenes videos he occasionally shoots. But never mind all that. He pretends he's gonna smush a cake into his best mate's face.

That's some good content right there.

3. Zlatan Ibrahimovic

There will be those who think Zlatan Ibrahimovic's account should perhaps rank a little higher. Essentially, the bigger fan you are of Zlatan and the mythos surrounding him, the higher you will have him on the list.

His Insta highlight this year was probably the mini furore he caused when he posted "Ready for the final" as a caption for a video of him walking through a pool during his rehabilitation, just ahead of United's trip to Stockholm for the Europa League final.

Of course, he meant he was ready to attend the game, but the little hint that perhaps he was ready to spring the surprise of a lifetime set United fans' hearts aflutter. It was classic Zlatan.

The account in general focuses pretty heavily on the "Wonder of Zlatan" and gets a bit branding heavy, but why not? When you're that good, there's no harm in showing off a bit.

2. Juan Mata

Mata is an artist.

Look, he did not even go with a caption. He lets this beautiful image speak for itself. And it does not just speak for itself—rather, it sings. The juxtaposition between the human world in the foreground and nature in the background. The composition of the straight line of the road that separates the two halves of the image with the more chaotic patterns of the houses' roofs and their myriad colours.

The Spaniard's post-football career as a travel photographer will be a successful one.

1. Paul Pogba

It was close between Paul Pogba and Mata, but the Frenchman has nudged ahead of Mata thanks to a higher level of consistency. Mata essentially peaks whenever he goes on holiday, but Pogba's putting in the Insta work all year round.

There are just so many highlights. The matchday photos are all great. His post-season pilgrimage to Mecca was shared through a series of moving videos in which it was clear how meaningful the whole thing was to him.

And, of course, there's the dab, which he mostly saved for times the club won trophies, making the whole thing even more special.

Pogba is a worthy winner and should be the first follow for any United fan with a new Instagram account.