Larry's Losers in The SEC , Week Four

My goodness, one quarter of the regular season has done been played and the Little Smart Pill Machine still ain't quite up to snuff despite some close calls with perfection.

Me and Baccardi have tweaked it all weekend and we think we've finally got the potion in proportion, so with a whole new batch of smart pills, we are gonna take on the second quarter of the season with a 23-4 record in place and our reputations in dire straights.

Arkansas at Alabama

The Petrino Porkies haven't liked the way the SEC has started out for them and the last thing they need to do is to mess with a stampeding elephant herd on the road to Atlanta. The Razorbacks are hopin' to catch the the big red beasts overlooking the bacon bunch from Fayetteville and get out with their pigskins still attached and a win of their own.

But with Nick Saban as the ringmaster of these performing pachyderms you can't count on him overlooking much. In the end, there's many new greasy spots on the hiway to Hotlanta from the tramplin' in T'town.  Larry's loser, Arkansas

Ball State at Auburn

Gene Chizik's got the Tigers tastin' victories and they are gettin' fat from the feedin' of all the foes who wander into the clutches of this new pride.

The Ball State Cardinals hope to fly in and fly out before the Tiger's know what hit them, but they done forgot that the boys from Auburn are Eagle's too, so that ain't very likely to happen without a serious pluckin'. Larry's loser - Ball State

Florida at Kentucky

The Kiffin clan made Urban's Gator guys look almost human last week and them other hill people from up the road in Lexington are hopin' they are gonna catch them sore shell-shocked.

The robust reptiles are outta the water here in the Wildcat's den and the Kentucky Kitties are hopin' to the stage the upset that usually happens to the Gainesville Gang at least once a year.

The only problem with that plan is that the Wildcats ain't got Monte's defense and the swamp lizards are lookin' to make a strong statement. In what could be an entertaining game, Larry's loser will be Kentucky.

Arizona State at Georgia

The Sun Devils come in the try and to try to steal a win between the hedges. These dogs have been a tough one to predict this season and another let down wouldn't be that hard to see happen.

Mark Richt ain't been too strict on enforcing that these guard dogs protect the win column the last few years, but I think he can relax this week and let nature take it's course.

The Sun Devils can't shine during a nighttime game and the dogs is gonna chase them away and send them home empty handed like a good dog should. Larry's loser - Arizona State

LSU at Mississippi State

Here we go with another classic cat and dog fight. Les Miles has had the Bayou Bengals banging out wins so far this season and Mullen's mutts have shed some of the fleas they had last season and have brought home some bones so far this year.

Baccardi the wonder dog and I have a big disagreement about this one. He sees the dogs comin' out on top in the upset special and I see them Cajun Cats winning.

While it's true that Les' feline's fail every season to live up to the billing every game during the regular season, I don't see this as the let down game and dogs walk away in the end with their tails 'tween their legs and some serious scratches. Larry's loser - Mississippi State

Ole Miss at South Carolina

The Rebels come a yellin' into Columbia and they intend to raid the chicken coop and take a fryer or two back to Oxford.  The Old Ball Coach has a defense that will test whether that rootin' tootin' rebel Jevan Snead has what it takes to live up to expectations in the SEC.

This could be a real contest and either team could wind up on top of this one by the end of the contest, but in the end, the Rebels leave with a pullet in their palm. Larry's loser - South Carolina

Ohio at Tennessee

The Bobcats from Ohio wander down to Knoxville looking for a little Southern hospitality, but that's one thing that Tennessee won't be volunteering.

This is one of those games and teams that the Volunteers will turn anything but loose. This game will have all the excitement of watching paint dry.

But the head-knockers from Knoxville will need a week off before running into a bunch of high flying War Eagles from Auburn next week.  Larry's loser - Ohio

Vanderbilt at Rice

Bobby Johnson got a hole chewed through the Commodore's hull last week by a bad bunch of bulldogs and the offense never got their oars in the water.

Rice sends the not so wise old owls out to do battle with the Nashville navigators this week and both teams need the win.

The Commodores may have looked more like stevedores last week when the Bulldogs all but sank the ship, but Bobby Johnson kept enough powder dry to blow these Texas feather heads out of the sky.  Larry's loser - Rice

Now go fetch my slippers Baccardi, it's time for bed! Get me outta here!

With fondest tribute to Leonard “Postoasties” Postero, 1922 - 2001.