From Prison to the Pages of B/R: A Life-Changing Experience

Four years ago, I was writing letters to my family about life from behind the walls of one of California's worst prisons, Corcoran State Prison.

Today, thanks to an awesome God that I serve, I am now writing about one of the most energetic sports known to man.

It’s hard to believe that I just posted blog No. 700 at NASCAR.com a few weeks ago.

Because for one, I hated writing letters and I never expected to ever go to prison.

But it was because of this experience, that I am able to write this today. 

While staring out of my prison window, I used to be able to see the cars go by and I always told myself.

“When I get out, I’m going to do things differently.”

It’s a whole different world in there, which causes your mindset, as well as your lifestyle to change dramatically.

The biggest problem is trying get rid of the prison mentality once you are released into the real world.

It’s not an overnight process, and it’s a hard mentality to get rid of. Because for one, you’re always thinking that the world is out to get you.

And because of that, you are always on the defense.

And until a person can come to the realization that the crime they committed was not the fault of the police, detective, D.E.A, or F.B.I. agent that busted you.

It's easy to continue to put the blame on other people for your own wrong doings.

While doing my time, we had a chance to watch NASCAR, because I was the one who fought to have the television rights to watch the race on Sunday.

I also was the one who got a lot of the inmates interested in NASCAR, because there were only two TVs.

The Southern Hispanics and the woods shared one of them, and the other one was for the Blacks and the Northern Hispanics.

Inside prison, you run with your own race or nationality. Me being Hispanic, I ran with the Southern Hispanics.

We weren’t allowed to eat or drink with the Blacks or Northerners. Nor were we allowed to watch their TV.

But we would watch NASCAR every weekend until football season started.

Another inmate and I would get the guys to put in one Ramen soup, and then we would put all the drivers’ car numbers in a hat, and draw for drivers.

Then whoever had the winning car number, would win all the soups that were bet.

This was one way of guaranteeing that the races would be shown, and it also helped to make NASCAR more interesting, as well draw more fans to the sport.

Then when I got transferred to another prison, we were allowed portable walkman radios, so I was guaranteed to listen to NASCAR on the weekends when football was shown.

By this time I was really beginning to think “How cool it would be to sit in front of my own TV, and watch the races.”

When you lose your freedom, you begin to think about the little things in life that we all take for granted.

You start to think about when you get out, how much you will learn to appreciate those little things.

Chewing gum and just being able to drink a glass of ice water, was a couple of them. The day finally came, that it was time for me to parole.

When I got out, I was under the impression that things out here would be different than when I first went in.

Even though it was a whole different world in there, I told myself that no matter what I was going to come out a changed person.

Then when I finally got my first computer, the first site I joined was a NASCAR site.

I didn’t realize just how much the Internet had to offer to the fans of NASCAR.

It was really cool when I first logged on, and started to read about the sport that I have followed most of my life.

As I began reading all the different blogs about the drivers and teams, I couldn’t believe all the hate, and the way a lot of the fans just didn’t appreciate what they really had.

Racism in prison is about as bad it gets, especially with all the hidden rules that had to be followed.

But I also learned a lot about driver and team prejudice, just by reading the different blogs and comments that were posted.

I began to question what would happen if your freedom was taken away whether for a day or a couple years.

Believe it or not your whole mind set changes, and I doubt that you–any of you–would be writing these kinds of blogs, or would be leaving those kinds of comments.

I guess you can say that’s when I decided that maybe, just maybe I could write just as good, or even better then some of the blogs that were being posted.

After all I have been a fan for a number of years, and I did read a lot of books while I was away.

But the most important thing that I learned was, I wanted to be different, I didn’t want to be like the rest.

Instead I wanted to prove that even though I did some prison time, that I could still come out and make a decent contribution to our sport.

I wanted nothing more than to prove that I had what it took, to be able to write just as good as the next person.

So that’s when it hit me. Why not take the writing styles of some of the top authors that I had read, and use it to my advantage to write about NASCAR?

The only thing on my mind for the next couple of years, was working as hard as I could to bring a whole different perspective to our sport.

In other words, a style of writing that could almost put the everyday fan right where the action is.

And at the same time also help the newer fans to be able to understand the sport a little better, as well as learn about it along the way.

My goal was also to keep all the hate out of my posts, and hopefully to win over some new fans to the sport.

So now my newfound freedom has been portrayed in more than 700 blogs that I have written about NASCAR.

Ranging anywhere from the technical issues, the marketing side, the controversy surrounding NASCAR, and of course the drivers and teams as well.

Just this last year, I was awarded NASCAR.com’s blogger of the year, which to me was a huge accomplishment.

The award itself not only showed how much my hard work was appreciated, but it also showed me that with a little hard work anything is possible.

As far as the award itself, anyone of the bloggers at that site could have won it, because each one of us has our own style of writing.

So does that make me any better than the rest?

I feel that it doesn’t. I look at it as a community award, and anyone that has ever posted a blog about NASCAR, or has contributed to the sport owns a small piece of it.

But unfortunately the award could only go to one person, and in my heart it still belongs to anyone of the thousands that have taken the time to write about our sport.

To go along with my writing, I have also gotten my G.E.D. since I have been out, and I am also certified by the State of California to do asbestos survey sampling, air monitoring, and project oversight in the environmental industry.

I am now up to five certificates for the asbestos side of the industry, and I am currently working on getting certified to also do lead sampling, as well as the project oversight.

I am also certified by the State of California to handle hazardous waste, such as acids, hazardous fluids, ground water sampling, and also hazardous gases.

I now work for an asbestos consulting company as a project manager, which is a very challenging job.

People can change, some for the better, and of course there are those that never change.

I was one of the fortunate ones that made my mind up the first day I stepped foot onto that prison yard that I was going to come out a totally different person.

Doing time gave me a chance to realize that as each one of has our dreams, or goals in life.

To never quit reaching for the stars, because I found out that they are very reachable.

Don’t ever quit trying to be the best that you can be in whatever you do.

I know that not all of our dreams will come true, but how else are you ever going to find out unless you keep dreaming?

This dream of mine could end today, but at least while it lasted I have the memory that will always be there.

And that is something that no one can ever take from me.

So next time you look out of your window, think about what it must feel like to know that you have no freedom.

Many nights and days I looked out that same window wondering when I was going to get to the other side.

Looking at the calendar, and counting the days when I would finally be able to walk out of those gates, and be free again.

Don’t take your freedom for granted wherever you are, or whatever you do. There are a lot of people out there that have no freedom.

I took mine for granted and paid the ultimate price, but now I am a free man, and I will never take my freedom for granted ever again.

So as I continue on my journey into the unknown.

I do know one thing that this journey was built from a simple dream.

And it’s up to each one of us to keep our dreams alive because when it is all said and done, it will be your own special accomplishment that will shine in your heart.