Predicting Every NBA Playoff Star's Excuse If They Don't Win a Title This Year

Every year, as soon as the best teams in the world start getting eliminated from the NBA playoffs and each team sits down to to their postgame press conferences, you'll end up getting the predictable answers from the same people.

A head coach will come out and say they were out-played and that they just need to work harder next year; an up-and-comer will say they'll do better next year with the valuable experience; and a star player will come out with the same, pre-packaged responses for every question.

"Why didn't you come away with a title this year?" is met with any variations on the classics: "We were out-matched," or "They just wanted it more."

However, you can see it in guys' eyes that there's something more than just the other team being better than them. There's something they want to say but can't because, well, bloggers would rip them apart (sorry about that, fellows).

So, I'm going to try to take a look deep into these star players' psyches and figure out what their real excuses will be, and from that we'll be able to see who they really are.

Dirk Nowitzki: My Owner Gave It Away

This one is pretty simple.

Dirk's chance at defending his and Dallas' title went out the window when their defensive anchor and offensive fail-safe in Tyson Chandler signed with New York.

Instead, Nowitzki was left with the likes of Brendan Haywood and Ian Mahinmi to try to fill Chandler's shoes in an effort to save money in anticipation of bringing Deron Williams to Dallas.

So, in short, Mark Cuban threw away Dirk's chance at repeating for the opportunity to get a younger superstar while keeping his old superstar with the team, something that may or may not irk the guy.

Chris Paul: My Coach Is a Nincompoop

Chris Paul has every reason to be frustrated with Vinny Del Negro—after all, he is Vinny Del Negro.

In between the terribly designed inbounds plays, the horribly timed timeouts and the complete loss of respect from his players, Vinny did little to actually help his team, which led to them getting severely out-coached by the Spurs. Who would have thought that Greg Popovich is a better coach than Del Negro?

The lack of a real coach led to collapsed leads, shorter runs and just worse play compared to the first round when they were running off pure momentum from that Game 1 comeback. The sweep was all but inevitable up against the Spurs. 

Carmelo Anthony: Injuries, Man, Just Injuries

Carmelo Anthony has plenty to deflect from his mediocre showing in the playoffs (showing up for three out of five games ain't bad, I suppose), especially with what the Knicks went through this season.

Jeremy Lin was unable to come back for the playoffs, and their already thin guard depth was weakened even more after both Iman Shumpert and Baron Davis had their seasons end with torn ACLs.

Oh, and there is that little bit about his partner in crime man-slapping a fire extinguisher and turning his hand into a baseball.

There's always next year for these always interesting Knicks.

Derrick Rose: My Knee Exploded

Of the rash of unlucky injuries that came in the first round of the playoffs, the most upsetting was the torn ACL of Derrick Rose, by far.

Rose went down in the waning moments of the first game of the playoffs, and from then on out the Bulls had no chance of doing much in the playoffs, let alone getting out of the first round.

Nobody on Rose's team stepped up (in fact, a few of them even seemed to step down), which led to a six-game loss to the Philadelphia 76ers and a first-round exit.

Hopefully he'll be ready to roll for next year's playoffs.

Paul Pierce: We're Getting Older

While the Boston Celtics are playing great basketball on any given day, they're also coming out looking lethargic and old, leading to struggles against younger teams like these Philadelphia 76ers.

Ray Allen has struggled for the entirety of the playoffs, and Pierce himself has had some very poor shooting nights, while Kevin Garnett is living in the past, tearing up defenses and hitting shots like he did when he was dragging the dead, lifeless Timberwolves behind him.

However, if they were to end up losing, it would be on the shoulders of that aging core, and if and when that does happen, that's going to be the focus of what's wrong with the Celtics.

Rajon Rondo: They're Getting Old

The easily frustrated Rajon Rondo has to have some issues with the guys he's playing with from time to time—how could he not?

When he's the only guy on the floor who is under 30 years old at times and ends up running a one-on-three fast break, having to resort to throwing his body into someone and drawing a foul to get points, there's something to be upset about.

His silent dominance of the playoffs this year (15 points, 13 assists, three steals and amazing defense) has gone overlooked, and if the Celtics get eliminated, it seems like Rondo would deserve little of the blame at this point.

Kevin Durant: Our Offense Isn't Three-Dimensional

It seems that the success of Oklahoma City depends on one of two things. If the Thunder are hitting their jump shots, then they're damn-near impossible to beat. If they aren't hitting jump shots, then they rely on James Harden getting things going with cuts to the rim and a ball slinging offense to win games.

If they can't do one of those two things (which is rare), then they lose.

The Thunder can play defense, they can score and they can hit jump shots, but they have serious flaws to their offensive games when they allow them to show.

OKC's big men are horrendous scorers, and when they have both Serge Ibaka and Kendrick Perkins on the floor, they are basically playing four on five on offense, as both Ibaka and Perkins are only useful from about eight feet in.

LeBron James: Injuries Killed Us

How insane is it that the one thing we've learned for sure in the playoffs this year is that Chris Bosh is a lot more important to the Heat than we ever thought he was?

In fact, I would go as far to say that he is the most important part of the team, not for what he does with the ball, but for what he does to the other team. Just his presence stretches out the defense, loosens up their pull on the paint and lets everyone get involved in the offense as open jumpers are easier to be had.

Bosh's absence, combined with Dwyane Wade's knee being worse than we thought it was and Mike Miller having a worse back than Larry Bird at the end of his career, means the Heat are definitely dealing with some troubling injuries.

Dwyane Wade: It Was Just Me and LeBron out There

They might not have had a lot of money to spend in the offseason, but you could argue that the Miami Heat spent every dollar wrong.

They ended up spreading about $15 million around to James Jones, Mario Chalmers, Rony Turiaf, Eddy Curry, Juwan Howard, Eddie House and Shane Battier, all of whom have underperformed or straight-up disappointed the Heat.

Because of that, the Heat, who looked like they would be a lot deeper than last season, are sitting with LeBron and Wade as their two best players, followed by an injured Chris Bosh, Udonis Haslem's solid defense and up-and-down offense, Mario Chalmers' mediocre shooting and unintelligent defense, and then a bunch of guys who either can't score, can't defend or can't do either.

That's four guys worth anything who are actually playing at this point and a handful of bodies.

Tim Duncan: We Were Outplayed

The only player who goes up there and says what he means at press conferences when he's spitting out basketball cliches seems to be Tim Duncan, a guy who only thinks about basketball as it is.

Duncan's mind is on basketball as much as Greg Popovich's, which means 23 hours out of his day are filled with basketball thoughts. The other hour is just a break before thinking about basketball again.

That, combined with the fact that the only way the Spurs seem to be able to be beat at this point would be for a team to play out of their minds and legitimately out-play the Spurs, makes me think that any excuse that Duncan gives would be what he really means.

Kobe Bryant: Spread the Blame Like Peanut Butter

Let's see. At this point Kobe Bryant has thrown his team under the bus for their inconsistent effort, and he's thrown Pau Gasol under the bus for not being assertive in their Game 4 loss. Who else is he going to blame for the loss as the days go forward?

Mike Brown will be an easy target, and I'm sure there'll be at least a few guys talking about getting the Lakers a new coach. Then there will be the lack of depth, for which he can place some blame on Mitch Kupchack.

From there, he can go down the list and blame Andrew Bynum for his lack of maturity; Ramon Sessions for his miserable series' the team trainer for not keeping him healthy enough to play every minute of every game' the ball boy for not passing him the ball right in the warm-ups, leaving him shooting weird all night; his kids for stressing him out; his shoes for being too tight; and Kevin Harlan for talking too loud when he's trying to shoot.

All that seems to be true right now is that Kobe isn't going to full-on blame himself for this loss.

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