Euro 2012 Preview: Ranking the Hotness of the Fans for Each Qualified Nation

Football fans are overwhelmingly male. But so what?

We're ranking the hotness of all 16 Euro 2012 finalists today, and there won't be any men in this countdown. Sorry. This countdown is all about appreciating the great-looking ladies who represent their countries with modesty and class.

Yeah, uh, something like that.

Anyway, since it doesn't seem fair to rank any of these ladies last, here's what we're gonna do. Nos. 16-11 all earn the title "honorable mention," and they'll appear in alphabetical order.

Of course, everybody will have their own opinion. Leave yours in the comments.

Honorable Mention: Croatia

Croatia just missed the cut. I think you can see why.

Honorable Mention: Czech Republic

Apparently not many Czech women follow football. This is just about the only female fan I could find for them.

Not bad.

The rest of the fans seem to be variations of this and this.

Honorable Mention: England

Apologies to our former colonial masters. Your women don't make the top 10.

We Americans appreciate English women's fashion sense, though.

Honorable Mention: France

The French are better than us at everything. We know because they tell us all the time.

Sorry, ladies, but all that arrogance is misplaced here. You just missed the cut.

Honorable Mention: Greece

For Americans, there's something innately interesting about anything Greek.

The country was the cradle of Western civilization back in the day, and their alphabet lives on through alcohol-addled college organizations throughout America.

Their women seem pretty cute, too.

Honorable Mention: Poland

So, they do the polka in Polska, right?

Any excuse to dance with Polish women seems like a great idea.

10. Ukraine

Meet the Ukrainian cheerleaders. Apparently they cheer on the Ukraine in a bunch of sports, including beach volleyball, it would seem.

Is it just me, or did they put the wrong girl out front?

9. Republic of Ireland

Maybe all Irish women aren't as hot as I think. After all, most of my experience looking at Irish women has come on St. Patrick's Day.

So is it beer goggles or not? You decide, but fast. St. Patty's Day is right around the corner.

8. Holland

If anyone brings the party as well as the Irish, it's the Dutch.

Oh, to be Dutch.

7. Denmark

See, here's the deal.

When you live in a country as cold as Denmark, there's nothing to do but figure out how to be really, really good looking. Like, even when you're a Viking.

More on this later when we get to Sweden.

6. Germany

In my mind, all German women wear dirndls and carry beer at all times.

That's exactly how it is, right?

What's that? They don't? Well, these women are pretty hot anyway.

5. Russia

Remember that stuff about living in a cold country and being hot?

Here's Exhibit B.

OK, so she's a hockey fan. I'm sure she also likes football.

4. Portugal

The Iberian Peninsula must be such a magical place.

Two countries, both with insanely hot women.

3. Spain

Again, the Iberian Peninsula must be such a magical land.

No wonder the Spanish national team never tries to do anything but pass. All the players are looking into the stands.

2. Sweden

Remember all that stuff about living in a cold country but being really, really, ridiculously hot?

Best example: Sweden.

And, my goodness, this is just so unfair.

1. Italy

Speaking of unfair: Italian women don't even have to try to look hot.

They just are.