Roll Tide Roll: Why I Love the Alabama Crimson Tide—Satire

Satire (n) 1. the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc.

Even though I attend the University of Georgia, I just have a deep affection for the University of Alabama.

There are just so many great things that happen in Tuscaloosa, Alabama.

I have already written about why I love the Auburn Tigers and Georgia Bulldogs, but it's time to take this discussion to the Alabama Crimson Tide.

I have called these schools out on not having the characteristics of honor, integrity, or character, but the same can be said about the University of Alabama.

The bottom line is that college athletics, in particular college football, are a very corrupt business.

So here is an article featuring the Alabama Crimson Tide.

Why do I love the Alabama Crimson Tide?

I love the fact that if every other school used Alabama's logic of claiming National Championships, everyone would be able to hang 5-10 more banners.

I love having an elephant as a mascot.

I love seeing football players driving around in Escalade's when everyone knows they can't afford them.

I love Louisiana-Monroe.

I love the fact that Alabama claim to be the National Champions from the Mom-and-Pop Computer Poll

I love blowing a 24-point lead against my rival.

I love how the Heisman Trophy winner's father has to watch the National Championship game from jail.

I love how every football player graduates and you don't need a pulse to get in.

I love how Alabama claims National Championships, even when they lose the actual National Championship game.

I love how I received my acceptance letter from Alabama a week after I applied.

I love the nickname "Crimson Tide".

I love Marcell Darius for accepting well-deserved benefits.

I love the fact that Alabama claims Auburn's 1957 title is tainted because they were on probation, but Alabama was on probation in 2009.

I love the Alabama D.J. playing "Take the Money and Run" when Cam Newton took the field in the 2010 Iron Bowl.

I love the relationship between an elephant and crimson tide.

I love selling books.

I love how Alabama graduates bring fishing poles into Sea World.

I love being on probation and vacating victories.

I love the fact that the only good thing coming out of Tuscaloosa is Interstate 20.

I love the respect Greg McElroy displayed to the Auburn fans in the 2010 Iron Bowl.

I love seeing Nick Saban violate NCAA recruiting rules when there is photographic evidence.

I just love the Alabama Crimson Tide.

I also have a deep affection for other SEC schools, click on the team name for why I love them:

Georgia Bulldogs, Auburn Tigers