Toronto Maple Leafs: 10 Things They Want for Christmas

For the first time since the lockout, it appears Santa has left the Toronto Maple Leafs off the naughty list. They're currently on probation, but it's a start.

Instead of coal, the Leafs can expect to find some real presents in their stockings this Christmas.

Full disclosure: I have not read the Leafs' letters to Santa.

That said, I think I have a pretty good idea of what the Leafs want for Christmas.

Here are 10 serious and not-so-serious things that are on their wish list this holiday season.

Seven of 10 Possible Points Between Dec. 22 and 31

The Leafs play the Buffalo Sabres on Thursday the 22nd and will close off 2011 with four straight road games.

Their opponents on that road trip will be the New York Islanders, the Florida Panthers, the Carolina Hurricanes and the Winnipeg Jets.

Aside from Buffalo and Florida, the competition should be light.

That said, the Leafs have a tendency to fare poorly against weak teams or teams that are taking a day off, so to speak.

The past few games have been must-wins for the Leafs, but they've only managed to win two games so far this month.

If they want to be in a good position going into 2012, they'll want to get at least seven points out of the next five games.

A Large Box of Band-Aids

Colby Armstrong is once again out indefinitely, this time with a concussion (one that he hid from everyone including the coaches and medical staff).

Mike Komisarek, Matthew Lombardi and Mike Brown are still weeks away.

Some teams can lose key players (e.g. Chris Pronger, Sidney Crosby) and still be considered elite.

The Leafs aren't elite even with all their players healthy, so they'll need as many healthy bodies as possible for as long as possible if they want to avoid a nasty dogfight in the spring for a playoff spot.

Improved Penalty Killing

The Leafs' PK sucks. Hard.

It needs to improve to at least 80 percent efficiency (from the current 73.4 percent) to gain some respectability.

Not much more to say, really. Their PK absolutely blows.

It's one big reason why they're only off the naughty list on probation.

Chemistry Set for Grabovski and Co.

Mikhail Grabovski, Nikolai Kulemin and Clarke MacArthur need to get going again.

Hopefully Ron Wilson will keep them together from now on so they have a chance to do so.

Nobody seems to have an explanation for their struggles.

Could it be that they're buckling under pressure, or are Leaf fans simply heaping too many expectations on them?

In any case, a nice chemistry set would make a great gift for these guys.

They'll not only be entertained for hours and be able to make some killer science fair projects, but they'll also learn neat stuff like teamwork.

Because there is no "try to dangle through four guys" in "team."

Optimus Reim To Transform Back to Old Self

It seems there's more than meets the eye with James Reimer.

He was the Leafs' saviour until he got knocked out with a head injury.

Since his return, he's been average at best.

The Leafs need him to stop being a Honda Civic and to turn back into the 30-foot puck-stopping, fire-breathing machine he used to be.

Where's that user manual?

Prolonged Losing Streaks for Divisional Rivals, Starting Now

The Leafs are doing well against the Montreal Canadiens so far this year, but not so well against their other divisional rivals.

Perhaps now is the time for drastic measures, starting with letters to Santa.

Other suggestions for making the other teams lose a lot include the old "laxative in the Gatorade" trick and...no, that's actually my only other suggestion.

Be sure to leave your clever suggestions in the comments below.

Beasts Within Kulemin and Frattin To Awaken

For Nikolai Kulemin, something has clearly gone wrong this season, given his goal total. He's been playing well in other aspects of the game, but his scoring touch has pretty much disappeared.

Matt Frattin is a rookie, but has shown signs of brilliance. When the beast within awakens, he is going to be a nasty player to play against. He'll deck you one minute and score a pretty goal the next.

Frattin is actually similar to Kulemin in some ways. For one, they're both difficult to knock off their feet. They're both pretty physical, yet skilled players. Frattin's meaner, but they're both nasty players to play against.

Time to awaken those beasts.

D Lessons for D-Men

That's Luke Schenn in the picture, but he's not the only Leaf defenseman that needs some D-101.

Some passing drills would be helpful. It would be nice to see some short tape-to-tape passes instead of those boneheaded stretch passes that get tipped into the attacking zone from centre ice.

Some improved stick work and board play would also be helpful. Every time an opponent brings the puck into the Leafs' zone, it stays there for over a minute. This is ridiculous and needs to be corrected.

Instead of reversing the puck to nobody, try chipping it off the boards.

You know, little stuff like that.

That wasn't too harsh, was it?

Jim Rutherford To Get into Holiday Spirit, Feel the Joy of Giving

According to Jim Rutherford via Bob Mackenzie, the Hurricanes have zero intention of trading Eric Staal or Cam Ward.

What a Scrooge.

A No. 1 centreman would make the Leafs' Christmas a wonderful one, even though the present would have to be delivered after the trade freeze is lifted.

In comes Rutherford, stomping on their dreams.

Bah, humbug!

Time for a little visit from the three ghosts of Christmas to show Rutherford the true meaning of Christmas.

Hopefully, he'll be in a giving mood come January and be willing to donate Staal to the Leafs out of the goodness of his heart.

Seriously Jim, think of the children!

We Know It's a Little Early, But...

How about a playoff spot?

Sure, the playoffs are many months away, but the Leafs have been relatively good all year.

My source, on condition of anonymity, tells me they promise to be good until this particular present is delivered and opened.

Look at Dion over there. How can you say no to that face, Santa?

So can we please see some playoff action in Toronto next spring?

Thanks in advance!