Occupy Sports: Come and Stay with Us

We are all familiar with the phrase “all good things must come to an end.”  For the protesters in the “occupy movement" that decided to make a city park their home for the past few weeks, they are experiencing this saying, first hand.  Slowly, one-by-one, these tent cities are being dismantled and their occupants told to move on. 

Where will they go?

Perhaps the sporting community can open its arms and welcome these groups of well meaning individuals?

Here are five possible sports locations that the protesters may find refuge.

Occupy Angel Stadium of Anaheim

How about allowing the protesters to set up on the grass-like greenery, right next to the waterfalls, found over the center field fence at Angel Stadium of Anaheim? 

Just think how convenient it would be for protesters to move from a city park to a ballpark.  Instead of having to create a new protest sign, now all they have to do is just cross out the word “city” and replace it with the word “ball.”

Also, this new location will allow protesters to enjoy the relaxing sounds of a cascading waterfall, because after a hard day of protesting, who wouldn’t want to be serenaded by this peaceful, watery sound? 

Ok, so the occasional home run ball may invade their living space.  But on the plus side, since they’re living in tents, no windows will be broken.

Occupy Augusta

Perhaps the protesters could set up their tent city on the 12th hole at the Augusta National Golf Course.  Why the 12th hole?  Since this hole is part of Amen Corner, and since these protesters are trying to slay a giant, like Wall Street, they will need all the divine help they can get.

This 155 yard par three is often associated with causing headaches for whomever ventures to tame it, so in that respect, the protesters would feel right at home.

Not only will the 12th hole provide the occupiers with a serene, peaceful environment, but because many of the members at Augusta are wealthy, a possible dialogue could be held between the two diverse classes with the goal of reaching an economic solution.

Sure this would be a long shot, but even if there is only a 1 percent chance of it occurring, it’s still worth a shot.

Occupy Charlotte Motor Speedway

Perhaps the occupiers could relocate their tents to one of the grassy sections found at the Charlotte Motor Speedway?

Since many of the protesters found a city park a welcomed refuge, the speedway can provide them with the loud sounds of car engines that they are leaving behind at their former downtown digs.

But a word of warning to the tent dwellers: Always stay on your Birkenstock-supported toes. Since you never know when one of the NASCAR drivers are going to try to replicate Dale Earnhardt’s infamous overtake of Bill Elliot in 1987, better known as the “pass in the grass.”

Occupy Indianapolis Colts

With winter preparing to howl down upon us in just a matter of a few weeks, and since one of the occupiers’ main objectives is to fight for those who do not have a roof over their head, another possible re-location spot could be inside the Lucas Oil Stadium, home of the Indianapolis Colts.

Even though there a still five weeks left in the season, the safest place for the protesters to set up their tent village would be in the opposing teams’ end zone. 

The reason? 

Given the Colts offense this year, the probability of them ever visiting this piece of property is highly unlikely.

Occupy Kentucky Derby

Another possible sports relocation opportunity for the occupy protesters are the soft, green spaces that are available at the historic Churchill Downs.

Churchill Downs and the protesters are a natural fit.  Many of the protesters like to wear strange hats, likewise, those who attend the Kentucky Derby.