Boston Red Sox: Making Me Stay Up Too Late, Drink Too Much Beer, Raid the Fridge

As a deliberate exercise in willpower and self-denial, I resisted the siren cry of the last bottle of Victory Ale's Hop Devil that remained in my refrigerator, even as Jon Papelbon put the tying run on board in the bottom of the ninth inning. Because four delicious, hop-heavy microbrew beers is too many on a work night for any responsible 40-year-old man.

Or so I've been told, by people like doctors and other medical types. 

But when the Orioles pulled within one and moved the tying run into scoring position I anxiously picked up my lucky L.L. Bean novelty lobster beer opener and waited to see if they would force extra innings. If so, I knew I would be going to the fridge one more time.

Twenty-plus years of drinking beers while watching the Boston Red Sox flirt with disaster has created a certain Pavlovian response.  

But, the tragic swan dive was averted for at least one more day. I continue to feel optimistic. For large stretches of this season, the Boston Red Sox were the best team in baseball, and there's no reason to think they can't get hot again if they can only sneak back into the playoffs after this epic collapse.

Instead of drinking that last beer, I was perfectly content to eat a Cliff All-Natural Granola bar, which I am able to convince myself is at least slightly more healthy than simply eating a candy bar.

There were shaky moments, but shaky moments are what being a Boston Red Sox fan is all about.

Did you hear? We have a new future star at catcher, and his name is Ryan Lavarnway!

Neither Bard or Paps were particularly soothing in their performance. But hey, they didn't completely blow it.

And at this point, simply winning the next game is all that matters anymore.