NBA Playoffs 2011: The Top 10 Most Embarrassing Teams in the Last 10 Years
Don't try this at home—stripping down on the NBA hardwood...floor—like Andrew Bynum and the Los Angeles Lakers embarrassed themselves doing this year.
The Lakers went out like true chumpions in Phil Jackson's all but seen last year with the team. But where does L.A. rank on this list of true chumpions composed by yours truly?
You'll just have to jump on board and ride the waves—courtesy of the Lake. Press the button to start the theatrics in five...four...three...two...one...
10. 2010 Orlando Magic: This Team Was Expecting To Challenge for a Championship
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Jameer Nelson apparently promised to meet NBA MVP Derrick Rose in the second round of this year's playoffs. Except Nelson and the Orlando Magic lost in the first round to Atlanta.
The Hawks swooped down and abracadabra'd the Magic after getting swept in the first round by Orlando in the 2010 playoffs.
Dwight Howard was soon rumored to be headed to the L.A. Lakers.
9. 2001-11 New York Knicks: For Over a Decade the Knicks Haven't Been Factors
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The tumble of the proud New York Knickerbockers came with sudden surprise and an expected decline into NBA irrelevancy. Controversy surrounding the team started after Jeff Van Gundy resigned early in December 2001.
The team then proceeded to hire Isiah Thomas as president in 2003. He became the coach after Don Chaney, Lenny Wilkens and Larry Brown. The boys from the Big Apple have been playing like snake-bitten busters since.
8. Minnesota Timberwolves: Stripped of 5 First-Round Draft Picks by the NBA
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The NBA eventually reduced the number of draft picks stripped from Minnesota to three—down from five.
In 2003, Kevin McHale's Minnesota Timberwolves had lost in the first round of the playoffs for seven straight years. This was compounded by the embarrassing fact that they were stripped of draft picks after improperly signing Joe Smith in 2000.
The contract was voided and the 'Wolves were fined $3.5 million—enough to fit in Floyd "Money" Mayweather's duffle bag. Get your money Duffle Bag Boys.
7. 2007 Cleveland Cavaliers: Swept in the NBA Finals by the San Antonio Spurs
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The Cavs were swept by the San Antonio Spurs in the 2007 Finals, and it would prove to be the last hurrah for both teams.
General Custer stood longer in the playoffs than the Spurs did after sweeping LeBron "Then-King" James and the Cleveland Cavaliers. And the team from Ohio hasn't made it back to the Finals since.
James was exposed and probably embarrassed—not being ready for prime time. After starring in extreme fashion against Detroit in the Eastern Conference finals, James farted against the Spurs.
6. Portland Trail Blazers: Better Known as the "Jail Blazers" from 2002-03
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Trail Blazers fans didn't have much to cheer about during the 2002 playoffs. The Blazers were swept in the first round by the L.A. Lakers.
Several of the players had been in trouble with the law for marijuana possession and it would continue into 2003. Coach Maurice Cheeks and the Blazers brass were mortified and let the press know it.
The revolting situation was like a tornado cloud forming over the NBA. Everything was literally going up in smoke.
5. Atlanta Hawks: In 2010, They Bowed Down Like Big Busters, Not Ballers
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In 2010, against the Orlando Magic, Atlanta coach Mike Woodson's team got smoked and bowed out like the Lakers did against the Mavs.
Except it was worse. Cheech and Chong couldn't outdo this smoking.
The Hawks got swept by Orlando so bad that Woodson hasn't been seen since. Atlanta went out like busters on the boulevard then, but new coach Larry Drew drove the Hawks to make the Magic disappear in the first round this year. They also competed against the Bulls before losing in the second round. It remains to be seen whether or not the Hawks will get gored in the playoffs next year.
4. San Antonio Spurs: The 2009-11 Versions Went 3-12 in the Playoffs
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Going fishing somewhere in the Far East—Pakistan, maybe—to be as hidden as possible has become common for the Spurs.
In the last two out of three years, they've been embarrassed in the first round of the playoffs. They got swept by Phoenix last year and knocked out by Memphis with the same flavor (4-2).
The Big Three became the Big Wounded Knee and bowed out in the first round after Dallas raked San Antonio (4-1) in 2009's first round. It's been on a first-come, first-served basis for the Spurs.
3. Cleveland Cavaliers 2010: LeBron James and Company Went Out with a Whimper
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The No. 1 seed in the NBA, Cleveland went into the playoffs as the favorite to come out of the Eastern Conference and challenge the defending champion Lakers.
The Cavaliers had swept the Lakers in the 2009-10 regular season and came out of the first round smoking. But Boston embarrassed the Cavs in the conference semifinals (4-2). It wasn't as close as the six games seem to suggest.
James was later accused of quitting by the team's owner, Dan Gilbert. LeBron ended up embarrassing the city of Cleveland by taking his talents—in a nationally televised event—to South Beach, Miami.
He was charged with everything from highway robbery to the RICO Act by Cleveland fans. No truth to the speculation Miami Vice's Rico Tubbs provides LeBron's security in Ohio.
2. 2007 Dallas Mavericks: Whoa, Nellie!
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Dirk Nowitzki, Josh Howard, Jason Terry, Devin Harris and Jerry Stackhouse had the Mavs rolling.
At 67-15, they finished the season as the No. 1 seed going into the playoffs...and proceeded to lose in the first round to Golden State.
What was so embarrassing was the fact Don Nelson—who had been unceremoniously dumped in favor of Avery Johnson—was coaching the Warriors. Golden State won the series (4-2) by a score of 111-86 in the final game.
1. The 2011 Los Angeles Lakers: We Thought They Had a Chance to Three-Peat
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In going for a three-peat in 2011, the Lakers got run off the court by the Mavs in the second round of the playoffs.
After a strong start to the season, they fell off, and then battled back to within reach of the No. 1 seed late in the schedule. Those were the days.
The Lakers went out like thugs and strippers in a smoke-filled room, and they get the No. 1 ranking on my list. Time for me to get smoking and get out of here.
Catch me coming to a neighborhood near you—with your girlfriend reading me up and down—on the next edition of Lake's Fantastic Cruise...
