NFL Week 15 Power Rankings: Rehashing Blowout Weekend

It was Blowout Weekend in the NFL, with nine teams winning by 20 or more points.

Mostly it was superior squads taking it to bottom-feeders, but there were some surprises along the way.

Dallas, for instance, didn't blow out Detroit, and Denver did the blowing out instead of getting blown out for a change.

Let's review the carnage...

 

(Team — Last Week — Record)

1 New England Patriots    1 (13-0)

The Patriots had looked old and tired the last few weeks. It took some foolish trash talking by an obscure Pittsburgh safety to get them fired up on Sunday.

It worked, as the Pats looked invincible again in blowing out the Steelers 34-13.

 

2 Dallas Cowboys  2 (12-1)

Just like the arrogant Cowboys to walk into Detroit expecting to get the game handed to them.

Instead Detroit, in the first half, handed Dallas their  a––...um, er, hats, roaring out to a 20-7 lead.

The Cowboys were lucky to come back, but every good team gets lucky now and again. Cowboy haters, and there are a lot of them, hope Dallas uses up all that good fortune before the playoffs.



3 Indianapolis Colts  3 (11-2)

Another blowout, as the Colts waltzed into Baltimore and rolled 44-20 in a game that wasn't even that close.

It sure looks like Indy smells the playoffs—or maybe that was just the rotting corpse of the Ravens.



4 Green Bay Packers  4 (11-2)

On to the next blowout in Green Bay, where the Packers destroyed the Raiders 38-7.  After the game Brett Favre said he was "glad he decided to come back this season."

Watching the entire state of Wisconsin hold its breath while Favre decides whether or not to retire is becoming an annual rite of spring, like April showers, May flowers, and baseball's Spring Training.

 

5 Jacksonville Jaguars  6 (9-4)

At the risk of sounding like a broken record—there was another blowout in Jacksonville, where the Jaguars pounded the Panthers 37-6.

This week in the NFL was worse than those early weeks in the college football season, when all the Football Factory U's play all the Cupcake States.

 

6 Seattle Seahawks  8 (9-4)

And speaking of cupcakes, Arizona played cupcake to Seattle's Football Factory U, losing 42-21.

Matt Hasselbeck was one of five QBs to throw four TD passes this week. Tom Brady, Payton Manning, Trent Edwards, and Jay Cutler were the others.

 

7 Pittsburgh Steelers  5 (9-4)

Steelers safety Anthony Smith guaranteed a victory over the Patriots, which made his disappearances on a 63-yard TD to Randy Moss and a 56-yard flea-flicker TD to Jabar Gaffney somewhat perplexing.

Not so perplexing was Smith's absence from the postgame press conference.

 

8 New York Giants  9 (9-4)

Finally a close game to talk about—and of course it comes in the NFC East where the 8-4 Giants took on the 5-7 Eagles.

You might expect that the Giants would have made a statement against the hapless Eagles, but instead they barely hung on to win, as Philly missed a 57-yard field goal to tie it in the waning seconds.

At least the Giants maintained their streak of beating teams with losing records, as all nine of their wins have come against sub-.500 squads, and all four of their loses have come against winning clubs.

Given that the G-Men are bound to run up against a team with a winning record in the playoffs, it looks like a "one-and-done" postseason run for New York this year.

 

9 Cleveland Browns  11 (8-5)

I got flamed a couple of weeks ago for calling the Browns boring.

"How can you call the Brownies boring," one fan fumed. "Look at all the exciting games they've been in this year."

Hey, I'm man enough to admit it when I'm wrong—these Browns are truly special.

After all, who else could make a game against the Jets exciting?

Kidding aside, the Browns are most likely going to the playoffs, and the entire city of Cleveland should be fired up.

Observers around the NFL are wondering how the Browns lucked into Derek Anderson...and what they're going to do with Brady Quinn. Not a bad position to be in as far as QBs go.

But while the Browns look like they can score with anyone, you've gotta question whether their defense can make stops when it needs to do...which if nothing else is indeed a recipe for exciting games.



10 San Diego Chargers  10 (8-5)

For the past two weeks, the Chargers have been saying, "We're back, we're back."

It sure took them awhile to prove it in Tennessee, where they needed overtime to come away with an ugly win.

Then again, the Titans are radioactively ugly—everything they touch gets ugly too. The Chargers were no exception.

 

11 Tampa Bay Buccaneers  7 (8-5)

Tampa Bay lost to Houston 28-14 with Luke McCown subbing for the injured Jeff Garcia.

Tampa fans were pulling for a Monday Night loss by the Saints so they could officially back into the playoffs, but the celebration will have to wait another week.



12 Minnesota Vikings  13 (7-6)

Two Viking defensive tackles, Kevin Williams and Pat Williams, intercepted passes from 49er quarterbacks as the Vikings rolled San Francisco 27-7.

Williams returned his interception for a TD 14 seconds into the game.

The Vikings would make these guys wide receivers except for the fact that both of them weigh over 300 pounds and run the 40 in about 10 seconds.

But they do have great hands. Better than Troy Williamson, anyway.

 

13 Buffalo Bills  15 (7-6)

The Bills repeated the same mantra all week:

"We will not be the first team to lose to Miami this year, we will not be the first team to lose to Miami this year..."

It paid off, as they rolled 38-7.

Pigs are flying in Buffalo for the second time this season, as Dick Jauron has his team above .500 again.



14 Tennessee Titans  12 (7-6)

What can you say about Tennessee?

Vince Young was a horrible 13-21 for 121 yards and two interceptions.  On the plus side, his QB rating was 38.1...which isn't quite as low as you can possibly get.

Kerry Collins, with a rating of 42.1, actually outperformed Young on paper—and Collins was 1-3 for minus-2 yards.

If you thought passer ratings were hard to understand, the Titans are even harder.

How is this team 7-5?



15 Washington Redskins  22 (6-7)

Just when you think it's finally safe to write off the Redskins, they go and do something totally out of character, like win a big game on the road to keep their playoff hopes alive.

For those of you that don't get the NFL Network, which is 70 percent of the country, the Skins beat the Bears 24-16 on Thursday night in Chicago.



16 Houston Texans  20 (6-7)

The Texans are flirting with their first winning season ever, and Houstonians are all atwitter in anticipation.

Will they do it?

Well, they play the Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde Broncos next week, and Lord knows anything is possible in a game with the Broncos.

But after that the Texans go to Indy and finish with Jacksonville in Houston—so we can safely say no, no winning season this year.



17 Denver Broncos  23 (6-7)

Back to the blowouts, where Denver was involved in its fifth blowout of the season.

Unlike the first four (Indy 38 - Denver 20; San Diego 41 - Denver 3; Detroit 44 - Denver 7; Oakland 34 - Denver 20), the Broncos actually did the blowing out in this one, notching a 41-7 win  over the Chiefs.

Way to go, Broncos!



18 Arizona Cardinals  14 (6-7)

The season slipped further away for the hapless Cards, as they lost to the NFC West rival Seahawks...and had to watch Seattle celebrate a division championship.

When you turn the ball over five times in a game bad things happen—and as good as Kurt Warner can be, he does throw a lot of interceptions.

But the Cardinals still have an outside shot at the playoffs, and might finish with a winning record even if they don't make the postseason.

Their remaining games are @New Orleans, Atlanta, and St Louis—teams with a combined 12-27 record.



19 Detroit Lions  16 (6-7)

Detroit's free-fall continued, as the Lions made mistakes that only bad teams are capable of making.

With time running out and Dallas down by six, Cowboy QB Tony Romo had the ball knocked out of his hands at midfield—and it bounced straight to Lions linebacker Paris Lenon.

"Fall on the ball," Lion fans yelled, "and it's game over!"

But noooooo—Lenon had visions of touchdowns dancing in his head, and tried to pick it up in stride.

Instead, he kicked it straight back to a Cowboy lineman, who (surprise) fell on the ball.

Everyone knew then and there that the Cowboys would score to win the game, because while it's true that good teams find a way to win, it's equally true that bad teams find a way to lose.

And Detroit, despite a 6-2 start, is now a very bad team.



20 New Orleans Saints  17 (6-7)

The final game of Blowout Weekend came Monday night, with the Saints hammering the Atlanta Falcons 34-14 in the Georgia Dome.

Bizarre as it may seem, the Saints are actually still in the hunt for the playoffs.

Equally bizarre is that the Saints are celebrating their 40th season this year—and in those 40 years have a grand total of six winning campagins.



21 Cincinnati Bengals  26 (5-8)

In a totally boring snorefest that absolutely no one cared about, the Bengals beat the Rams 19-10.

Since Chad Johnson didn't score any TDs, we can't even talk about what stupid thing he did to celebrate.

The only positive thing about this game is that of all the 5-8 teams in the league, Cincy is the only one that got there by winning last week.

Woo hoo Bengals!



22 Philadelphia Eagles  21 (5-8)

See Donovan dink, see Donovan dunk...which is Philly's offense in a nutshell.

McNabb's first 17 completions on Sunday averaged 7.5 yards.

On the last drive, when the game was on the line (and admittedly, the Giants were playing prevent), McNabb's three completions averaged 17 yards apiece.

You think Philly could maybe benefit by throwing the ball deep once in awhile?



23 Chicago Bears  19 (5-8)

Chicago fans are wondering where to get playoff tickets.

They should check eBay for Patriots, Colts, Cowboys, Packers, or Seahawks tickets—because they certainly aren't going to find any playoff seats in Chicago.

Oh, and those February trips to Arizona they reserved after last year's Super Bowl can be converted into visits to the Cubs' Spring Training facilities.



24 Carolina Panthers  18 (5-8)

"We've got three games left," said safety Deke Cooper after Sunday's game in Jacksonville. "Who knows what's going to happen in the playoff race. We've got to play every game like we're still in the playoffs."

Cooper is a Panther.

Did someone hit him in the head during the 37-6 shellacking his team took from the Jags? Does he know where he is? What day it is? Or his own name?

Someone call a doctor!



25 Oakland Raiders  25 (4-9)

Finally we've reached the four 4-9 teams—or as they're called after Sunday's slate of blowouts, the victims.

We start out with the Raiders, who were victimized by the Packers 38-7 in Lambeau field.

Did anyone tell the Raiders that Brett Favre loves to throw the ball deep?

It sure didn't look like it, as the Raiders gave up two scoring bombs from Favre, the first to Greg Jennings for 80 yards and the second to Donald Lee for 46 yards.



26 Kansas City Chiefs  27 (4-9)

Victim No. 2 was the Kansas City Chiefs, who caught Denver on a full moon or during catnip season or whatever it is that turns the Broncos into a real football team.

Sacrificial virgins have put up more of a fight than the Chiefs did in Mile High on Sunday.



27 Baltimore Ravens  24 (4-9)

Victim No. 3 was the Baltimore Ravens, who got pounded by the Colts.

The Ravens' problem is that they now believe the officials are out to get them, so they spend more time worrying about the refs than they do worrying about the other team.

That makes it easy for QBs like Peyton Manning to have career days—and Manning was on the bench relaxing with a cold one by the end of the third quarter.



28 Atlanta Falcons  30 (4-9)

And finally, victim No. 4—the Falcons, whose former QB, Michael Vick, was sentenced Monday to 23 months in federal prison for running a dogfighting ring.

Since Vick was widely believed to have cost both Dan Reeves and Jim Mora Jr. their jobs, Bobby Petrino is breathing easier tonight.

But what if it wasn't Vick who cost those former coaches their jobs—what if it was the whole team?

Like New Orleans, Atlanta has only six winning seasons in its 41-year history.

Unlike New Orleans, Atlanta has never had two winning seasons in a row.

It sure must be hard to build a tradition of winning under those circumstances.



29 San Francisco 49ers  31 (3-10)

Mike Nolan was in his suit again, and he sure looked a lot classier than his team.

The 49er defense went into orgies of celebration every time they stopped Adrian Peterson, who managed only three yards on 14 carries.

But stopping one guy isn't the point—winning the game is.

Apparently, when victories are as few and far between as they have been for the 49ers this year, you have to take your celebrations where you find them.



30 St. Louis Rams  28 (3-10)

After a loss to the woeful Bengals, St. Louis asked Los Angeles if they want the Rams back.

LA said no.

They'd rather have an expansion team like the Texans.



31 New York Jets  29 (3-10)

Eric Mangenius sure looked pretty stupid kicking a field goal late in the game and then going for an onside kick with all his timeouts left.

You either go for it on fourth down and score a TD, or you kick the field goal and use your timeouts to conserve the clock while your defense holds the other team to a three-and-out.

That may not work either—but it's gotta be better odds than recovering an onside kick.

Speaking of odds, I wonder what the odds are of the Jets beating the Pats in Foxboro next week.



32 Miami Dolphins  32 (0-13)

Miami inches closer to immortality.

Will they go 0-16?  Many have tried, but none have ever done it.

The Fins play the Ravens next week—and the way the Ravens are playing, it wouldn't be too surprising if the Dolphins beat them.

Of course, they Ravens would throw a fit and blame the refs, and no one wants to see that.

The following week they're up at New England, and if the 0-14 Dolphins beat the 14-0 Patriots, that would be too weird for words.

That leaves Cincy in the final game of the season as the Dolphins last, best hope to avoid never-ending ignominy.

Most teams would probably rather play the Patriots in these last three weeks than risk being the ONE team to lose to the Dolphins.