1. New Orleans Saints (1-0)
The Saints offense was not as explosive as we’ve become accustomed to in their 14-9 win over the Vikings, but the defending Super Bowl champion’s defense was more than impressive holding Brett Favre and Adrian Peterson in check.
2. New England Patriots (1-0)
Tom Brady looked well worth $18 million a year throwing for 258 yards and three touchdowns against the Bengals.
3. New York Giants (1-0)
Hakeem Nicks (75 yards, three touchdowns) looks like Eli Manning’s new favorite target. Not a good thing when you’re facing both of them in fantasy and you have Steve Smith on your team.
4. Green Bay Packers (1-0)
Brandon Jackson (18 carries, 63 yards) looks more than capable of replacing Ryan Grant if he’s forced to miss any time because of the ankle injury he suffered in Week 1.
5. Baltimore Ravens (1-0)
Despite putting up just 10 points, the Ravens’ new passing game lived up to its billing with 233 yards, and Baltimore’s defense was even better.
6. Tennessee Titans (1-0)
Chris Johnson has rushed for at least 104 yards in 11 straight games.
7. Pittsburgh Steelers (1-0)
Dennis Dixon managed the game in place of Ben Roethlisberger and the defense did the rest against Atlanta.
8. Minnesota Vikings (0-1)
Over his past seven season openers, Favre has averaged just 171 yards passing per game. That’s well below his career average of 240.
9. New York Jets (0-1)
We know the Jets’ defense is good. We also know their passing game is not.
10. Washington Redskins (1-0)
Donovan McNabb’s debut with the Redskins was mediocre (15-for-32, 171 yards), but Mike Shanahan’s was outstanding as he led Washington to a 13-7 upset of division rival Dallas.
11. Dallas Cowboys (0-1)
I don’t have a huge problem with Wade Phillips not having Tony Romo take a knee at the end of the first half. I place more of the blame on Romo for dumping the ball off instead of just heaving a prayer deep and Tashard Choice for not just going down when he saw the play going nowhere. In the end, it was penalties that killed the Cowboys, as they collected 12 for 91 yards, including the big holding call that nullified the game-winning touchdown.
12. Houston Texans (1-0)
Houston always seems to hang with Indy, but this time they actually hung on and it was all thanks to Arian Foster.
13. Indianapolis Colts (0-1)
It’s the same old story of Peyton Manning trying to carry the team on his back.
14. Atlanta Falcons (0-1)
This was one of the most disappointing performances of Week 1. Matt Ryan got almost no support from his running game that rushed for just 58 yards.
15. Miami Dolphins (1-0)
I’m sure the Dolphins were happy to see the road trip to Buffalo come in September rather than in December.
16. Jacksonville Jaguars (1-0)
Who had David Garrard (138.9) second in the league in quarterback rating after Week 1?
17. Philadelphia Eagles (0-1)
The Kevin Kolb era may have lasted just one half in Philly.
18. Cincinnati Bengals (0-1)
The Bengals offense showed pretty much nothing until they were down 31-3.
19. Seattle Seahawks (1-0)
The Seahawks were one of the big surprises of Week 1, rattling off 31 unanswered points in the final 32:26 of their game against the 49ers.
20. Kansas City Chiefs (1-0)
The Chiefs’ defense allowed 389 yards, but only 14 points to lead the team to a big win over the division-rival Chargers late Monday night.
21. San Diego Chargers (0-1)
The Chargers were just 4-for-15 on third down vs. KC.
22. Arizona Cardinals (1-0)
A solid start to the Derek Anderson era in Arizona.
23. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (1-0)
The Bucs’ defense forced three turnovers in their 17-14 win over the Browns.
24. Detroit Lions (0-1)
The Lions had a win stolen from them thanks to one of the many dumb NFL rules.
25. Chicago Bears (1-0)
The Bears swiped a victory for the 211 people who picked them in my 1,226-person suicide pool.
26. Denver Broncos (0-1)
Committing two turnovers while forcing none cost the Broncos a win in Week 1.
27. Buffalo Bills (0-1)
After one week, the Bills have the worst offense in the league.
28. Cleveland Browns (0-1)
Jake Delhomme has thrown at least two interceptions in six of his last 12 games.
29. St. Louis Rams (0-1)
The Rams had a rookie QB throw the ball 55 times in his debut. No wonder Sam Bradford had three picks and a rating of 53.1.
30. Carolina Panthers (0-1)
Matt Moore’s three interceptions made him look a lot like his predecessor.
31. San Francisco 49ers (0-1)
The Niners suffered the worst butt-whooping of Week 1, along with the …
32. Oakland Raiders (0-1)
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Jordan Schwartz is one of Bleacher Report's New York Yankees and College Basketball Featured Columnists. His book Memoirs of the Unaccomplished Man is available at amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com, and authorhouse.com.
Jordan can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org