Scintillating Spurs Crush Woeful Wigan

Before this match even began, many people were questioning just which Wigan team would show up, the team that stunned Chelsea 3-1 at the DW Stadium eight weeks ago, or the team that lost to Portsmouth 4-0 just three weeks ago. I shall return to this question later on, after I describe a truly phenominal afternoon of football in North London. The match started fairly normally, Tottenham pressure on the Wigan defense. This pressure finally cracked in the ninth minute, when a low, pacy cross from Aaron Lennon - who had a wonderful afternoon - found a Peter Crouch sprawling diving header, leaving Chris Kirkland fuming at his defense for their inept attempt at defending 1-0.

Kirkland then had a very good rest of the first half, making three fine saves from Lennon, Palacios and then Defoe towards the end of the half. Half time, Spurs one up.

Wigan turned up for the second half, apparently, in good spirits after a good half time team talk from manager Roberto Martinez. This team talk worked brilliantly, until the 50th minute, when Jermain Defoe crashed in number two, once again from a Lennon pass. 2-0.

Wigan looked perplexed, and rightly so. Just two and a half minutes later, number three came along, after Wilson Palacious' great pass found an unmarked Defoe, who grabbed his second in three minutes. 3-0

Wigan then woke up, and Hugo Rodallega crossed for Paul Scharner-who appeared to control the ball with his arm-to slot in. The camera cut to Robbie Keane, (who, just five days before, Ireland team had been knocked out after a dubious, though deliberate Thierry Henry handball) whose facial expression was of the 'Oh no, not again'. 3-1.

Just 70 seconds later, and the three goal deficit was restored, with Aaron Lennon-claiming his hat trick of assists-crossing in for Jermain Defoe-who claimed his hat trick of goals. Easy as you like. 4-1, 32 minutes to go.

There was then an entire five and a half minutes between the next goal. But never fear, Peter Crouch had a shot which was well saved by Kirkland during this time.

As promised, goal number five came along, scored, deservedly so, by Aaron Lennon, assist provided by Crouch. 5-1

Another five minute break between goals, time enough for Wigan to bring on Jordi Gomez for Hendry Thomas. Vedran Corluka then provided a very nice assist for Jermain Defoe to grab his fourth of the day. 6-1. You could be forgiven for thinking Spurs would have stopped the scoring spree now, considering there was infact still 20 minutes left, and some clubs stop scoring after a certain amount of goals, Chelsea in particular do this.

Oh dear, how wrong we were.

Eighteen minutes later, number seven came along, with Defoe grabbing his fifth, the first player to score 5 goals in a single game since Alan Shearer scored five against Sheffield Wednesday in 1999. This is Defoe's first goal which he created himself, with no assist.

Just over a minute later, Tottenham won a freekick, conceeded by Paul Scharner, who was booed all afternoon after his handball, but I think he paid back his debt with a ridiculously needless foul. David Bentley hit the freekick, it hit the bar and hit Chris Kirkland on the back and went in for an unfortunate own goal. 8-1.

As we entered stoppage time, the fourth official indicated that there were to be a minimum of four minutes of added time. As soon as the board came up, a huge cheer came from White Hart Lane, as the crowd started singing 'We Want 9'. Part of me also agreed with them, no because I don't like Wigan, but because I love football, and I love goals.

Niko Kranjcar awoke in stoppage time, to gently smash the ball of the underside of the bar and in for number nine. 9-1 full time.

So, to answer the question I asked before in the article, which Wigan side would show up? The answer is neither the Chelsea or Portsmouth team, the answer is the worst defensive performance I have ever seen in my entire life. I have seen and been apart of some very bad defences, but Wigan epitomise this. No Premier League team should be losing to another 9-1, NONE.

Please note: I feel very sorry for David Dunn, who has been playing very well for months now. He scored an excellent goal for Blackburn against Bolton on the same afternoon, and must have thought he was in with a great chance of being in Fabio Capello's next England squad for the match in March (the opponents are still unknown), until Jermain Defoe got five in one afternoon.