Fantasy Football 2019: Early Cheat Sheet for Choosing Best Team Names

Sports fans are a superstitious bunch. Sometimes that superstition comes in the form of pregame rituals, dietary decisions or even patterned underwear choices. Practically nothing is off-limits when we need to get our team a competitive edge. And fantasy football is no different.

Some fantasy football coaches (or general managers, whatever your preferred terminology is) use longstanding, league-specific, dynastic team names. Others regularly adjust their team name in order to embarrass their weekly opponents.

A vast majority, though, like to call upon their feature players and popular culture to imbue their squad with some topical energy. If you are one of those enlightened, relatable coaches, then this cheat sheet is for you.

Mind you, this third brand of team name is as low-brow as you can get. Appealing to the common denominator of pop culture is not without its setbacks, so you will have to excuse many of these names for being cheesy.

Without the guts to list these based on how well they balance the line of horrible, clever and topical, they are instead categorized by position group and ordered vaguely by ADP.

Running Back

• Kamara Harris

• Zekey Friday

• Le'Veon on a Prayer

• TGS: The Gurley Show

• Kerryon My Wayward Son

• In Da Chubb

• Dalvin and the Chipmunks

• Return of the Mack

• Henrything Is Possible

• Talk to Me Guice

• Hines Ketchup

Most of these are pretty self-explanatory. Kamala Harris is a presidential candidate, and Freaky Friday is a cinematic masterpiece. Fans of 30 Rock will remember TGS, and hip hop fans should know "In Da Club."

Popular expressions "Talk to Me Nice" and "Hennything Is Possible" have also become immortalized through music—and hopefully soon through Derrius Guice and Derrick Henry's fantasy football feats.

Wide Receiver

• Bend It Like Beckham Jr.

• JuJu on That Beat

• JuJu Tang Clan

• Wheelin 'n Thielen

• Keenan: Masters of the Universe

• Chillin' at the Golladay Inn

• Pop Lockett, Drop It

• Keke, Do You Love Me?

• DaeSean Hamilton: the Musical

• Honey Funchess of Oats

• DJ Chark DooDooDooDoo

I'm just going to go ahead and assume that all of these are either recognizable or easily Googled. "Keenan: Masters of the Universe" is a definite stretch, but the team icon potential is limitless.

Quarterback

• Mahomes and Watson

• Rum Ham Newton

• Dad Wentz to Get a Pack of Cigs

• Bae Watch with David HasselGoff

• You Winston, You Lose Some

• It's Britney, Mitch!

• The Brady Bunch

• FitzMagic: the Gathering

If you're in a superflex or 2QB league, paying up for both Patrick Mahomes and Deshaun Watson is an absolute necessity just to snag that "Mahomes and Watson" team name. Bonus points if you Photoshop their faces onto Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly for your team icon.

Tight End

• So Sexy It Ertz

• Big Kittle Lies

• George of the Jungle

• Old McDonald Had a Stiff Arm

"Big Kittle Lies" is topical, but "George of the Jungle" brings the mysterious energy of '90s humor with it.

"So Sexy it Ertz" is a quality ode to a tremendous karaoke song, but "Old McDonald Had a Stiff Arm" both invokes Vance McDonald's shenanigans and another interesting karaoke song.

Defense

• Area 51

It had to be done. There aren't many players in the NFL who wear No. 51, but Barkevious Mingo does. He plays for the Seattle Seahawks, so if you draft them as your defense—boom—ultimate meme team name.