Just In Time: Your 10 Sports-Themed Halloween Costumes

So you're a sports fan with no idea what to wear to that Halloween party Saturday night?

Here's a few ideas for you (and how to create them)

1. Eric Mangini

Depending on your attitude, you may need an attitude adjustment.  Start by fining your friends for taking anything that isn't their personal property.  Did they take a pen off someone's desk for a moment? That sounds like a $1701 fine!  Next, be angry at everyone no matter what.  Don't smile or congratulate.  Just beat people into submission.  May I suggest a few videos of Adolf Hitler in action?

Then, you'll need to get some stuffing, or just eat anything in sight.  Mangini has been packing on the pounds again in Cleveland, so make sure your ready.

Get a Browns hoodie or jacket and a headset.  Don't worry, you won't hear any more good information in your headset than Mangini hears in his.

Great For: Parties of knowledgeable Browns fans, Steelers victory parties, making Raiders and Lions fans feel better about themselves, party at Romeo Crennel's house

2. Jason Giambi (circa 2008)

The Giambino.  The perfect costume for anyone who wants to sport a "pornstache" or pass themselves off as a very poor Thurmon Munson lookalike.

You'll need a Yankee uniform, make sure you pump up the body a little (you know what I mean).  For those particularly brave, wear a gold thong OVER the uniform trousers.  Don't forget the mustasche either.  That's key.

Great For: Parties during the World Series, Parties of overweight Chippendale's dancers, Halloween Party at the Playboy Mansion

3. Vlad Guererro

You'll need the Angels uniform, the dreads and a bat.  To complete the look, swing at anything.  Swing at baseballs, anything.  You're a free-swinging kind of guy.

Great For: Parties with lots of breakable objects, Angels mourning parties, Party at Vlad's House

4. Josh McDaniels

You'll need a hoodie, although this time roll up the sleeves, some track pants, a white hat, and a headset and playsheet.  To complete the look, pump your fist at everything.  Someone shotgun's a beer? Fist pump.  Someone passes out?  Fist pump.  Someone punches you in the face?  Fist pump.

Great For: Parties with those who practice martial arts, Belichick lookalike contests, Kids (just like little Joshy himself)

5. Mike Tomlin (Winter Edition)

You'll need the hair that retains the exact imprint of your headset, scary eyes (rewatch your beloved Steelers losing to the Bengals a few times), and, of course, the Tomlin puffy black coat.  To complete the look, stare everyone down and remind them continually that "it is what it is" and that "we need to focus our preparation" for the party.

Great For: Parties that lack preparation and attention to detail, Rashard Mendenhall's Halloween bash, Steelers parties

6. George Steinbrenner

You'll need the dark sunglasses, matted white hair, and the white turtleneck and brown sports jacket.  To complete the look, fly in from Tampa and then have yourself driven around in a golf cart.  Fire anyone who disrespects you.  After all, you're the Boss.

Great For: Corporate parties, Parties at Yankee Stadium, Parties in Philadelphia

7. Scott Hartnell/Mike Tyson Combo

You'll need to divide your face and hair into half bald and tattooed and half long, stringy hair.  Wear half of a Flyers jersey with lots of blood on it (your opponent's blood of course).  To complete the look, bite anyone at the party wearing a Kris Letang jersey or dressed as a boxer.  Another option would be to fight anyone who comes near you.

Great For: Hockey parties, Fight clubs, Parties in Philadelphia, Oprah's party

8. Jim Zorn & Dan Snyder (Two Person Costume)

You'll need the Zorn look (tall hair, Redskins windbreaker, totally confused, bewildered and kind of ashamed of yourself facial expression) and the Snyder look (expensive suit, cocky attitude, total lack of football savvy).  To complete the costume, have the Snyder component stab the Zorn component in the back and rip his headset off of him.  Optional would be to, halfway through the party, hand the headset to the person calling Bingo.

Great For: Parties of Monday Morning Quarterbacks, Bingo Parties

9. NFL Official/MLB Umpire (Single or Multiple People)

You'll need at least one of your party to wear the hideous NFL throwback referee uniform, everyone else can be dressed in the current getup.  To complete the look, call penalties at random.  Penalize for holding anytime someone gets close to scoring.  Don't favor anyone, just make sure you blow as many calls as possible.  Optional would be to review a call using your digital camera's video feature.  Then overturn yourself with an Ed Hochuli-esque ten minute explanation.

Great For: Referee parties, Roger Goodell's Halloween bash, John Harbaugh's party

10. Al Davis

The classic costume.  You'll need an Oakland Raiders track outfit, but occasionally forget that your team isn't in LA anymore (or yet).  You'll need thick glasses on a chain and you'll need to be the oldest person in history to wear bling.  To complete the look, bring along an overhead projector and fire someone "for cause."  Also: continually ask people to "throw deep" whenever possible.  Optional would be to bring along "Tom Cable" and have him punch people in the face.

Great For: Raider Nation parties, Al Davis' house, Senior Citizen parties, any party at Lane Kiffin, Norv Turner, or Art Shell's house.

Almost But Not Quite On The List:

Alex Rodriguez: We wouldn't want him to suddenly realize it's October now, would we?

Terrell Owens: He seems to have disappeared.  No one can find him.  There was a rumor about Buffalo, but stat sheets seem devoid of his presence.

Bobby Cox: Was on the list, but got ejected for arguing

Mark Sanchez: Was too late for the party because he stopped to get a hot dog

Jay Cutler: Demanded to be traded to a different party when we invited McDaniels, then had his invitation to that party picked off

Brett Favre: Couldn't decide whether he would come or not.

Brad Childress: One cross-dressing incident was scary enough.

Michael Crabtree: Held out for more money and didn't RSVP in time

Larry Johnson: Was invited, but slammed the party on Twitter and was told to go away

Brady Quinn: Wanted to come, but was told to sit down.  Derek Anderson was invited instead.