ALDS Playoff Picks: Russia v. West Poland and Germany v. East Poland

Is it unfair to dismiss the rest of the American League—and perhaps all of MLB—as simply background to the inevitable Boston vs. New York War of Each Other?

Sadly, no.

But when other teams are playing, we have to pretend.

This is really a key point in baseball's decline to a niche sport (along with the interminable length of games, and the simple fact that for my lifetime, America's sporting soul has been bathed in violence, not play, which means that football will always trump baseball—but that's a whole 'nother kettle of words).

It's highly akin to the 1950s "Golden Age" of baseball, which was only golden if you were a fan of one of the three New York teams, and teams were in such danger of failure that widespread migration happened.

But since the system is broken at both ends, as MLB+ teams don't contribute enough to revenue sharing and most MLB- teams are de facto farm system teams that don't even try to win...well, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Besides, it's the only baseball we've got.

Red Sox vs. Angels

There's a very real chance that the third time could be the ch...actually, um, no.

Ignore the Angel offense (one of the best years in their history, with breakout years from Kendry Morales and a million guys getting all pesky), because the team is still made up of lots of guys who come up very small when the games matter—and yes, I'm looking at you, Vladdy Daddy and Bobby Abreu.

Also, please ignore the suddenly shaky Boston starting pitching, since Josh Beckett has been less than stellar recently, Clay Buchholz has never been here before, and if they have to start Dice-K, Tim Wakefield, or Paul Byrd, they are officially sunk. (Besides, the Angels have no true ace, especially since John Lackey always struggles against the Bostons.)

Instead, focus on where the game will be won: late game relief. Boston's is dramatically better in the seventh and eighth inning with Josh Bard and Billy Wagner. The Angels counter with Kevin Jepsen (Who? Exactly.) and a committee that includes...good Lord, is that really Darren Oliver?

I'm assuming that they'll do the bright thing and designate one of their starters down here to help matters, but there really isn't much here in the way of a power arm to come out when the pressure is on and get outs.

I'm seeing at least one of these games turning on a four-run sixth or seventh inning for Boston, as the crowd goes nuts for it either home or away, because there really aren't any Angels fans. Or at least, there aren't any Angels fans that are willing to be near Red Sox fans. (Understandable, really.)

And then there's the ninth. This should be the last year in Boston for Jonathan Papelbon. He's about to get expensive and ineffective, seeing as how his strikeouts are trending down, his WHIP is trending up, and there's only so long that you can throw at hitters in the ninth inning before people take notice (four HBP this year in 68 innings, and any number of wrestling heel moments that he's used to get hitters on tilt, rather than getting them out with stuff).

Witness the petulance when Billy Wagner was brought in; Pap's either losing his filth or getting bored enough with baseball that he needs to inject some drama in his life.

This is the first year of his life that he's made real money (a one-year deal in January for $6.25 million; tick, tick, tick), and the management has shown its willingness to move anyone that doesn't play nice in the past, especially when they pop off on the radio about their willingness to sign with Coke—err, the Yankees.

But he's a heckuva lot better than Brian Fuentes.

Now, this is hard for me, because I want to believe in Fuentes. So long as he keeps the job in Anaheim and doesn't go all Brad Lidge on us, he's going to rack up 40 to 50 saves, and...I own him in my keeper league. Like Tinkerbell, I want him to exist and be good, if only because Mike Scioscia is fantasy gold.

But then there's the simple matter of seeing him pitch, and, um, he's not up to getting the final outs twice in a five-game series. Not by a long shot.

The Red Sox really aren't that good. Beyond the touchy starting pitching and less than airtight pen (they are better than the Angels, but not actually good), the offense has never really recovered its explosiveness post-Manny Ramirez, and it's hard to care too much about their standout defense when it's all just a matter of white guys being in good position.

They are the baseball Borg, smothering you in their near Canadian levels of surface pleasantry. Even J.D. Drew is less loathsome in this setting, and the fact is the most hated and feared hitter in their lineup is the oddly intense (I thought players that worked the count were cerebral?) Kevin Youkilis, who doesn't even show up at the same place in the lineup every day.

They can, and will, be had.

Just not by the Angels.

Boston in four.

Twins vs. Yankees

Does God love us enough to give us a plucky upstart, overcoming injury, on a miracle run after winning a one-game playoff to beat the big bad Bombers? Dream a little dream of it with me, please.

Say goodbye to Fox's dream of the 30 hours of programming that a six-game Yankee-Red Sox series will deliver...and the beyond tired Each Side Celebs...and the "fun" of rooting for the lesser of two evils, when both sides try to become more evil by the day...and embrace the Twinkies, and the Homerdome That Will Not Die.

On some level, it's not surprising that the Twins are here. The gods of karma do not smile upon teams with drunken stars, and that describes the late and unlamented Tigers.

But in the next round, they'll have a gassed bullpen (seven pitchers worked in tonight's 12-inning meat grinder), a bottom of the order that just doesn't hit, and the task of trying to overcome home field advantage against the heart of the Bronx, against a team that is 7-0.

Even with the astounding Joe Mauer, the surprising Michael Cuddyer, the streaking Orlando Cabrera, and the best hitter no one knows about (Jason Kubel), it's not enough, and here's why.

In the first three games of this series, the Yankees will start CC Sabathia, A.J. Burnett and Andy Pettitte. The Twins are likely to start Carl Pavano (no, really), Nick Blackburn (a control guy who generally pitches to contact), rookie Brian Duensing, and/or tonight's gassed "ace," Scott Baker.

It's not overstating the point that none of these guys would start a game for any other playoff team.

I get that they are adorable. I get that they defend, scratch, and claw, and are damned deadly difficult to beat in the Homerdome. But this Yankee team is made of guys who (a) stay loose and (b) grind out at-bats—against a Twins rotation that should have a true ace in Francisco Liriano (whoops, he's terrible now), a solid strike thrower in Kevin Slowey (hurt), and a much less hittable Baker.

I'd love to be wrong. But it's not going to happen.

Yankees in four.

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