Browns Fans: Curb Your Enthusiasm...But Enjoy the Ride

Football season is almost upon us!

Rookies report to camp next week and the veterans follow soon thereafter.

Gone is the old coaching staff. Gone are the days where the inmates are running the prison, the animals are running the zoo, or [insert your own metaphor here for Romeo Crennel’s coaching style].

Also gone is Phil Savage and his in-fighting with players, backstabbing management personnel, and passing the buck for the team’s losing ways onto the coaching staff.

Fans, it’s safe to send e-mails to Browns headquarters without having to hide the kids before opening the response.

A new day has dawned in the history of Cleveland Browns football, so it’s OK to get a little excited.

Go ahead, get excited about Rob Ryan and the new “Bear defense.”

That’s right! We might actually see an opposing quarterback on his back—instead of baking a batch of cookies and doing his taxes before looking downfield for a receiver.

Don’t you worry about that rush defense that ranked dead last in 2008. We’ve got Kenyon Coleman.

You can even dream that Brady Quinn is the next Joe Montana.

When this season’s over Brady is going to be hawking everything from sports drinks to Subway sandwiches.

Oh wait…he already does that. Anyway, he’s going to be on your television set a lot.

You can fantasize about how Braylon Edwards will return to the Pro Bowl and wear a Buckeyes cap on the sideline.

I know…I know…forget Braylon. Brian Robiskie will make us forget the Browns’ franchise ever traded Paul Warfield.

Josh Cribbs is going to be Superman. Add safety to wide receiver, running back, quarterback, punt returner, kick returner, and gunner.

The word is that he’s going to be the half time entertainment at home games too!

Eric Mangini? He’s the next Bill Belichick—except this time we’re not going to fire him before he wins multiple Super Bowls.

Side note: The next time you see Cleveland Plain Dealer writer Tony Grossi, kick him in the teeth for me. The guy still will not admit he made a mistake when he was writing daily pieces trying to get Belichick fired for not being his friend.

All those Jets who now reside in Cleveland are going to prove once and for all that were it not for Brett Favre, they would all be wearing Super Bowl rings right now.

By the way, I heard that Brian Daboll is third cousins, twice removed, by marriage of Bill Walsh.

Those six games without a touchdown in 2008? Forget about it!

The point is, this team was 4-12 last season. Let’s not go expecting miracles.

I don’t want to hear anybody calling the local sports talk shows from the I-480 bridge after a couple of losses.

Browns fans, let’s just take this season for what it really is.

You can go ahead and say it: “A rebuilding year.”

Don’t get me wrong, I like the direction of the team.

I like the new acquisitions and like the improved depth.

The truth is that the Browns have not had this type of depth since before it re-established the franchise in 1999.

Enjoy the season…because it’s f-o-o-t-b-a-l-l.

And I love football!

Just curb your enthusiasm.

If you expect less and get more, you will live a much more peaceful existence.

Your television set will stay in one piece, your dog might not hide under the furniture, and your family might stand to be around you during game time.