Welcome to Total Team Wrestling! (Part One)

[Fireworks explode as the nWo theme plays.]

Jeff Gorman: Welcome to the debut of Total Team Wrestling! We are live in Trenton, N.J., for the kickoff party of the greatest team competition in wrestling history.

We have a night full of action for you, plus we will find out the lineups for all 16 teams. Introducing team No. 1, the New World Order!

Scott Hall: Hey yo. Nobody’s gonna come close to winning the TTW Cup except the n-W-o! (crowd chants along) We’ve got Six-Pac, we’ve got big Scott Norton, and of course, we’ve got the Stinger (the fake nWo Sting).

"Vincent here is gonna watch our backs. Take a look at what we do best."

VIDEO: Footage airs from Ohio Wrestling League Show No. 9, where the nWo attacked X-Factor, The Prophecy, Paul London, and Joey Mercury.

Gorman: Introducing team No. 2, Raven’s Flock!

{Music: “Come As You Are” by Nirvana} Yes, we’ve bought all the music rights we need!

Raven: I’ve got Saturn, and I’ve got Kanyon. The rest of you have to fight for the last spot. Right now. Raven’s Rules. Quoth the Raven…nevermore.

Match One

Billy Kidman won a four-way dance over Sick Boy, Lodi, and Super Nova when he pinned Lodi after the Seven-Year Itch (shooting star press).

Kidman walked off with the rest of the Flock.

—COMMERCIAL—

{Music: “Disposable Teens” by Marilyn Manson}

Gorman: Here to introduce team No. 3, please welcome Allison Danger!

Allison: Scott Hall, you and the nWo have been making a lot of enemies lately. Well now, your enemies have come together. Now, you’re dealing with the Prophecy Factor.

Justin Credible, Albert, Danny Maff, and Brazilian jiu-jitsu expert BJ-J Whitmer come to the ring.

VIDEO: All 16 teams will earn points throughout the season. The top two teams will compete for the TTW Cup in the final show of the season.

{Music: "Thriller" by Michael Jackson}

Gorman: Introducing team No. 4, The Natural Born Thrillers!

Sean O’Haire is not doing the "white Michael Jackson" gimmick anymore, and of course, Chuck Palumbo is no longer obligated to be the promotion’s “Dojo Boy.” They are accompanied by “Above Average” Mike Sanders and Shawn Stasiak.

O’Haire: Would you look at that? (pointing to the video of his team doing the “Thriller” dance on OWL Show No. 9) Shawn Stasiak, you were a little bit out of step.

“If you want to stay on this team, you have to earn it. Mark Jindrak, come on down here. Don’t worry, Shawn. You’d do the same thing if you were me.”

Match Two

Shawn Stasiak pinned Mark Jindrak with the Perfect-plex.

All of the Thrillers shook hands and walked to the back together, but Stasiak is officially on the team and Jindrak is not.

—COMMERCIAL—

{Music: “Stayin' Alive” by the Bee Gees}

Gorman: Introducing team No. 5, the Full-Blooded Italians!

Tommy “Wildfire” Rich leads the FBI, carrying the Italian flag with his face on it.

Tommy: Hey people, y’all know Tracey Smothers, Little Guido, Johnny the Bull, and Big Vito! We’re gonna eat, drink, dance, fight, and win. Then we’re gonna party!

VIDEO: The bottom three teams in the TTW standings at the end of the season will be relegated, just like in European soccer. Since there is no lower league, they will disappear, and three new teams will take their place next season.

Gorman: Introducing team No. 6: Too Cool!

{Music: Too Cool theme}

Rikishi: Brian Christopher, Scotty 2 Hotty, and I are looking for a partner who knows how to dance and knows how to fight. We’ll see who’s best at both, and then we’ll make our pick.

{Music: “Sex Machine” by James Brown}

Ernest “The Cat” Miller comes to the ring and does his James Brown dance in his red slippers.

The lights go out and it starts snowing in the arena as Glacier enters. He does his wild video-game karate moves, which is sort of like a dance.

Match Three

Glacier pinned Ernest Miller after a cryonic kick.

Rikishi: Glacier, I think you are “too cool,” even for us. Let’s go, Ernest.

Scotty 2 Hotty puts sunglasses on Miller to signify that the Cat is on the team.

—COMMERCIAL—

The ring is surrounded by a college drumline, a string orchestra and a gospel choir. They perform “A Family Affair” by Mary J. Blige.

Gorman: Introducing team No. 7, The Congregation!

Pope Elijah Burke rides out in his black popemobile, leading Xavier (with Simply Luscious), Elix Skipper, The Alpha Male Monty Brown, and Notorious Shane Taylor.

Gorman: And their opponents in this six-man tag team match, team No. 8, The J.O.B. Squad!

{Music: "Breathe" by Prodigy}

Al Snow (with Head) leads The Blue Meanie and Gillberg (with fire extinguisher-and-sparkler entrance) for six-man tag team action.

Gorman: And please welcome the man they’ll be fighting over, 2 Cold Scorpio!

{Music: 2 Cold Scorpio's WCW theme}

Scorpio dances to the ring with the Scorp-ettes.

Match Four

The JOB Squad upset The Congregation when Gillberg speared Skipper for the pin.

Gillberg: Who’s next?

Shane Taylor answers that question with a clothesline and a huge splash.

—END OF PART ONE—

Do you have any ideas for teams to be a part of Total Team Wrestling? Remember, you need four active male wrestlers who are not currently in WWE, TNA, or ROH. Leave your picks in the comments section. Thanks!