Football's All-Cartoon Offense

QB: Bugs Bunny has all the tools to be the All-Galaxy QB. He is always one step ahead of the competition and I can't remember the last time Daffy actually got the best of him. Never. Elmer Fudd. Never. I think he is undefeated.

What puts Bugs above all the rest? He's not that All-American, poster boy that Mickey Mouse is, he has tricks up his sleeve that you never see coming.

NFL Player: Peyton Manning. Although he has that poster boy demeanor, I crack up every time i see that commercial of him hurling footballs at little kids, shows the dark side.

RB: Road Runner has been leaving people in the dust for years. His vision is second-to-none and can see holes in the defense before they even know he is gone. The lone setback of the Runner is he has no hands, could cause a fumbling problem.

NFL Player: Adrian Peterson. The boy can fly but we need to see one thing from Adrian. Hold on to the ball "all-day", not just a half AP.

WR: Peter Pan. If someone that has the ability to get up in the air like Pan does, how do you not throw him the ball, and think about it he'll never grow up. He would fit perfect under Jerry Jones. Sound familiar?

NFL Player: Terrell Owens. He's immature, mischievous, and can fly down the field.  

WR: Mighty Mouse will save the day, and if not, he will try his hardest to make sure that his team has a chance. Hopefully he just doesn't leave 2:37 on the clock next Super Bowl.

NFL Player: Larry Fitzgerald has become the best receiver in the game, he has glue for hands and you cant help but ask yourself if he didn't have five pounds of hair on his head how much higher he could jump? Get this guy a cape.

TE: The Pink Panther doesn't say much, but with paws like his, anything in his general direction is considered caught. His show has been underneath the rest for quite some time, but he will be a HOF selection for sure.

NFL Player: Tony Gonzalez. The Chiefs suck and the lone bright spot has been Gonzo. I feel for the guy. He has been the best in the game for years and has nothing to show for it.

OL: Bruno is hands down one of the strongest cartoon characters to cross the TV set. He gave Popeye troubles for years. His brute strength and tenacity places him above all the others.

NFL Player: Larry Allen could squat 900 lbs and bench 700 lbs. No wonder why he was the anchor of the Cowboys Dynasty in the '90s. He is done playing now, but I still remember him so he makes the team.

OL: Patrick from Spongebob Squarepants is a force to be reckoned with. I don't know how many of you actually have seen this beast in action, but you don't want to see him mad.

NFL Player: Alan Faneca has been a staple on Pittsburgh's line since he won the Joe Greene Award for rookie of the year for the Steelers. Seems like a nice guy, just don't get on his wrong side.

OL: Yogi Bear. Please don't steal his picnic basket. He will track you down wherever you are. He protects that like he protects his QB.

NFL Player: Steve Hutchinson was a great pickup for the Vikings and is the only reason they have time to do anything in Minnesota.

OL: Fred Flinstone. He can bowl, he can drive a car with his feet, so you know he can drive back any DT in the league.

NFL Player: Matt Light. Drove Jevon "the Freak" Kearse down to the ground and held him to two tackles in Super Bowl XXXIX.

OL: Porky the Pig is a stout little guy that causes havoc on the line. Seems to be more pest like than anything else.

NFL Player: Olin Kruetz. Olin seems to bother everyone on the defensive side of the ball and just keeps on ticking.