Assembling a Bar Room Brawl Roster for the AFC East

Football is a game of tough guys who don't mind a lot of physical contact. Sounds like a group of people you want on your side if things get a bit more physical than you expect on a night out.

When you're heading into a bar room brawl, you want strong, physical guys on your side, but it helps to have quickness on your side as well. Don't underestimate the power of leadership, either.

With all that in mind, here are the AFC East's best of the best for a bar room brawl.

QB: Tom Brady

Say what you will about his lavish life style and supermodel wife, but there's one thing you can't deny about Brady: He's a competitor.

Someone who hates losing as much as Brady does is always a great ally in a bar room brawl. He will do just about anything to make sure he comes out on top, and if he doesn't, he'll start throwing pool cues.

RB: Shonn Greene

Greene is a tough, hard-nosed runner who willingly throws himself into large piles of men and is ready to take a beating and also to inflict one on anyone in his way.

If that's not the perfect combination for a companion in a bar room brawl, I don't know what is.

FB: John Conner

Three words: Ground and pound.

There are very few traditional fullbacks left in the NFL, but at 5'11" and 240 pounds, every inch of Conner's body screams "fullback." He is a violent run-blocker, rating out as the best fullback in the NFL in that regard according to Pro Football Focus.

And with a nickname like "The Terminator," there's no way Conner could be left off this list.

WR1: Stevie Johnson

Wide receivers aren't (typically) renowned for their size or their physicality, and though some are simply freakish athletes, others get by on quickness. That's okay, because we could use someone that can float like a butterfly and sting like a bee.

Besides, he's the only guy who can get off Revis Island. There's gotta be something to that.

WR2: Santonio Holmes

Call him selfish if you want, but he's an athlete, and he doesn't mind going over the middle and making tough catches in traffic. 

In 2010, he always seemed to come through just at the right time. Someone with that kind of sixth sense for showing up right when he's needed is a great friend to have on your side before things go down and after.

TE: Rob Gronkowski

At 6'6" and 266 pounds, Gronkowski is a mountain of man. If there's anyone who can stop Gronkowski, they have not yet shown themselves on an NFL football field.

Aside from the fact that defenders will literally run the opposite direction when he gets into the open field, Gronkowski's ability to beat man coverage and block effectively make him someone you want to have on your side in a bar room altercation.

Based on size and intangibles, Gronkowski may be my No. 1 go-to for this list.

LT: Jake Long

At 6'7" and 315 pounds, Long is one of the best left tackles in the game. His physical style of play has allowed the Dolphins to open up holes in the running game for years in what was a run-heavy offense under former head coach Tony Sparano.

LG: Logan Mankins

Mankins is easily the enforcer on the Patriots offensive line. He is the very definition of "blue collar," with a gritty, hard-nosed attitude that has served him well in the trenches for years. 

He's also the first to take action when things get dirty, and Tom Brady has been fortunate to have Mankins at his side on more than one occasion.

C: Nick Mangold

The Jets center is one of the only linemen in the league who is man enough (no pun intended) to take on Patriots nose tackle Vince Wilfork one-on-one. Those are some wars, and there are different victors to be sure, but Mangold's willingness to do so is a testament to his selflessness and his threshold for pain.

He can definitely hold his own on the field and off.

RG: Richie Incognito

Who better than an offensive lineman with a mean streak to have your back in a brawl?

Incognito has a hard time controlling his temper on the field, but that mentality can be harnessed off the field. The 6'2", 305-pound Incognito has a "nasty streak," and that kind of intensity would be welcome if things get heated at your local bar.

RT: Sebastian Vollmer

Vollmer has played multiple spots for the Patriots offense, proving his ability to take on a wide variety of opponents. He's proven his toughness over the course of his career as a viable run blocker and a mauling right tackle.

He often takes on an opponent's most physical defensive end with ease. Why wouldn't you want him on your side?

LDE: Mario Williams

Williams is a jack of all trades at defensive end. He has the speed to get around the corner, the strength to set the edge and bull rush, and even the athleticism to play from an upright position as an outside linebacker.

Fighting is all about a combination of strength, speed and overall athleticism. Williams brings a combination of all three to the table.

DT: Vince Wilfork

Wilfork is a leader for the Patriots defense, having served as team captain last year and co-captain from 2008 through 2010.

Oh yeah, he's also 6'2" and 325 pounds of a guy you definitely don't want to mess with. It often takes two or three people to stop Wilfork simply from moving forward. Imagine how many people it would take to get him off his feet in a fight.

DT: Marcell Dareus

Although Dareus has been in the league for just one year, he's already proven his toughness in the middle of the Bills defense. He consistently drew double-teams as a five-technique lineman in the 3-4 defense, and he'll get more opportunities to victimize interior offensive linemen in the 4-3 as a penetrating tackle.

It's his unique combination of size and athleticism that makes him such a great prospect for an all-bar room brawl team. He could easily sneak up on the ogre of the opposing group.

RDE: Cameron Wake

The best player on the Dolphins roster is also the one laying the biggest hits on offensive players. He may not be the biggest guy in the room at 6'2" and 236 pounds, but he proves that size isn't all that matters every time he beats an opposing offensive tackle off the snap.

His quickness would serve him well against guys whose reflexes will likely be a little bit slower in a bar room brawl.

OLB: Karlos Dansby

Dansby is a heat-seeking missile for the Dolphins defense. He doesn't just make contact, he goes looking for it.

ILB: David Harris

Basically, you don't earn a nickname like "Hitman" for nothing. 

More to the point, though, he has led the team in tackles every year he's been healthy since he joined the team in 2007. That is a testament not only to his leadership, but also to his willingness to get down and dirty in run defense. 

When there's a big group of guys going at it, the Hitman's a good one to have on your side.

OLB: Kevin Burnett

Burnett is physical against the run and athletic enough in coverage. His ability to match up with his opponents in both regards make him a great asset. He can take on all comers, big and small.

He's also adaptable, remaining a team leader for the Dolphins after making the move over from the San Diego Chargers.

CB1: Antonio Cromartie

Cromartie's long build makes him a great man coverage cornerback, and that length will help him keep opponents at bay during a fight.

Let's just hope he's a little less shy of contact than he was against Tim Tebow and the Broncos.

CB2: Vontae Davis

As 6'0" and 205 pounds, Davis has the frame to take on some of the league's best receivers one-on-one. He's a physical corner in man coverage and although he may not be the biggest guy in the building, he's up there with the quickest of them. 

FS: Jairus Byrd

Jairus Byrd isn't the most physical safety in the league—rather far from it—but he isn't afraid to stick his nose into a pile and hit people. He tallied 98 total tackles in 2011 and has increased that number steadily over the course of his career.

If there's a big group of guys in a melee, Byrd won't shy away from contact.

SS: LaRon Landry

LaRon Landry is known as one of the hardest-hitting safeties in the league. He never minds getting his hands dirty in run defense, either.

Just look at the picture, and it's plain to see why Landry would make a great partner in a bar room brawl. We don't care how Landry got those guns, or if he even has a permit for them, but he can put them to use anytime he wants as long as they're not being used on me.

Erik Frenz is the AFC East lead blogger for Bleacher Report. Be sure to follow Erik on Twitter and '"like" the AFC East blog on Facebook to keep up with all the updates.