Ranking the Greatest Super Bowls of the Past 20 Years

In anticipation of Super Bowl XLIII between the favored Pittsburgh Steelers (14-4) and the upstart Arizona Cardinals (12-7) this Sunday at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, I ranked the best NFL championship games I have seen over the past 20 years.

When reading this list, remember that chocolate and vanilla ice cream flavors were created because everybody has different tastes. In laments terms, I know my selections will not be universally respected or agreed upon and that is understandable.

Nevertheless, let me be clear, I am NOT a fan of the New York Giants. I root for leopards on crutches (the New York Jets) and I have never witnessed my own team win the Vince Lombardi Trophy in my lifetime. I write unbiased pieces and, in the same mold as iconic reporter Howard Cossell, "I call it like I see it."

20) In January 1993 at the Rose Bowl Stadium in Pasadena, the underachieving Buffalo Bills were throttled by quarterback Troy Aikman and the emerging Dallas Cowboys 52-17 in Super Bowl XXVII. Aikman completed 22 of 30 passes for 273 yards and 4 touchdowns en route to being named Super Bowl MVP. This contest was as exciting as Paris Hilton sans her foray into porn. The only occurrence of note that this game provided was the unveiling of the Cowboys 90's dynasty.

 

19) In January 1992 at the Metrodome in Minneapolis, quarterback Mark Rypien and the insanely dominant Washington Redskins manhandled the talented Buffalo Bills 37-24 to win Super Bowl XXVI. Rypien, a Canuck who completed 18 of 33 passes for 292 yards and two touchdowns, was named the Super Bowl MVP. XXVI's only intrigue stemmed from Bills running back Thurman Thomas' rudderless search for his misplaced helmet. By the time he located his dome piece, the Skins were already well on their way to a 24-0 lead.

 

18) In January 1999 at Pro Player Stadium in Miami, long-in-the-tooth quarterback John Elway and the overwhelming Denver Broncos clipped the Atlanta Falcons 34-19 to win Super Bowl XXXIII. Elway, who became the oldest player ever named Super Bowl MVP at 38 years of age, retired a few months later in the spring after leading the Broncos to their back-to-back championships.

 

17) In January 2003 at Qualcomm Stadium in San Diego, the once creamsicle-donning Tampa Bay Buccaneers thumped the "badass" Oakland Raiders 48-21 to win Super Bowl XXXVII. XXXVII is often labeled as the "Gruden Bowl" because the primary storyline surrounding the game focused around Jon Gruden. Gruden was the Raiders offensive coordinator and a head coach from 1998-2001 and then became the Bucs coach in 2002. Hence, the contest was considered "Gruden's old team" versus "Gruden's new team."

 

16) In January 2001, the Baltimore Ravens and their menacing defense knifed the former Kerry "Vodka" Collins and the New York Giants 34-7 at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa to win Super Bowl XXXV. Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis made 11 tackles, six assists and blocked four passes en route to being nominated Super Bowl MVP. Nevertheless, the charismatic thug, who was acquitted of double-murder the previous off-season, was not welcome at Walt Disney World because organizers thought Mickey would be uncomfortable in the presence of the defensive beast. The only thing more heinous than the game was the Backstreet Boys performance of our national anthem.

 

15) In February 2006, the Seattle Seahawks were beaten by both the zebras and the Pittsburgh Steelers 21-10 at Ford Field in the murderous and corrupt city of Detroit to win Super Bowl XL. This game was as appealing and eye-catching as tits on a bull. On the positive side, the Rolling Stones did perform at Halftime.

 

14) In January 1994, running back Emmitt Smith and the Dallas Cowboys won their second-consecutive championship 30-13 over the Buffalo Bills at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta to win Super Bowl XXVIII. Smith carried the ball 30 times for 132 yards and two touchdowns to earn the Super Bowl MVP. Because the tiresome Bills were yet again in the final game, it was inevitable that this Super Bowl would lick anus and, as expected, it did.

13) In January 1995, Steve Young and the San Francisco 49ers smoked-out the mediocre San Diego Chargers 49-26 at Joe Robbie Stadium in Miami to capture Super Bowl XXIX. Young completed 24 of 36 passes for 325 yards and he was also the games top rusher with 49 yards on the ground. The celebratory tokes of reefer enjoyed amongst Niners fans emanated from the Pacific Northwest to South Beach.

12) In January 1990, quarterback Joe Montana and the San Francisco 49ers blazed the feeble Denver Broncos 55-10 at Louisiana Stadium in New Orleans to capture Super Bowl XXIV.  The mismatch was the most lopsided championship game in the annals of the NFL. Montana was named Super Bowl MVP, his third award in his fourth and final Super Bowl victory. Although the game was an utter shellacking, the Niners immense greatness almost compensated for the pathetic drudgery.

11) In January 1996, cornerback Larry Brown and the Dallas Cowboys defeated the Pittsburgh Steelers 27-17 at Sun Devil Stadium in Tempe to win Super Bowl XXX. Brown, who helped "America's Team" capture their third championship in four seasons, was named Super Bowl MVP after he recorded two interceptions off Steelers quarterback Neil O'Donnell and returned the picks a total of 77 yards. In reality, O'Donnell should have been given the award on the Cowboys behalf. The Steelers would have been better off with Colonel Frank Slade under the center instead of O'Donnell.

10) In February 2007, quarterback Peyton Manning and the Indianapolis Colts defeated the Chicago Bears 29-17 at Dolphin Stadium in Miami to win Super Bowl XLI. Manning was named the game's MVP, completing 25 of 38 passes for 247 yards and a touchdown. Simply put and without any fluff, this game sucked more than a Lewinsky.

9) In January 1997, the Green Bay Packers handled the New England Patriots 35-21 at the Louisiana Superdome in New Orleans to win Super Bowl XXXI. Days after the game, Patriots Head Coach Bill Parcells realized Tuna was better in New Jersey than it is in New England and he fled for East Rutherford and the Jets vacant position.The win was the Packers third overall Super Bowl victory and their first one since Super Bowl II.

8) In February 2005, the New England Patriots beat the aerobically-crippled Donovan McNabb and the Philadelphia Eagles 24-21* at ALLTEL Stadium in Jacksonville to win Super Bowl XXXIX. In retrospect, I wish I never recognized this game as an event. I should have gone to a vacant movie theater and enjoyed a good flick. Any time a gimpy Terrell Owens is cast as a "hero" in an underdog role versus a scandalous franchise like New England, you know the game is going to be a viewing debacle.

7) In February 2002, quarterback Tom Brady and the New England Patriots upset the heavily favored St. Louis Rams 20-17* at the Louisiana Superdome in New Orleans to patriotically win Super Bowl XXXVI, the first NFL championship game played in a post 9-11 world. Brady, who completed 16 of 27 passes for 145 yards with a touchdown and led his squad into field goal range for the game-winning kick, earned Super Bowl MVP honors. Voila, the Brady legend was born that winter evening in "the Big Easy."

6) In February 2004, quarterback Tom Brady and the New England Patriots narrowly avoided being upset by the Carolina Panthers 32-29* at Reliant Stadium in Houston to win Super Bowl XXXVIII. Brady, who set a Super Bowl record for the most pass completions (32) in a game and threw for 354 yards and three touchdowns, was deservedly awarded his second NFL championship MVP in three years. Despite the riveting contest, the true highlight occured when the viewing world saw Janet Jackson's sun-shaped, right-tit at halftime during her duet with Justin Timberlake. All in all, it was an entertaining and fulfilling night in "Space City."

5) In January 2000, storybook quarterback Kurt Warner and the St Louis Rams beat the Tennessee Titans by a yard and a score of 23-16 at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta to escape victorious in Super Bowl  XXXIV. Warner, who complemented his regular season MVP award with the Super Bowl MVP nomination, completed a 73-yard touchdown pass to dynamic wide receiver Isaac Bruce to take a late 23-16 lead over the Titans. Ultimately, the championship was decided on the final play of the game when Rams linebacker Mike Jones tackled Tennessee wide receiver Kevin Dyson one-yard shy of the goal line to prevent a potential game-tying touchdown and extra point attempt. As was the case the entire 1999-2000 season for Warner and the Rams, everything was apeaches in Georgia.

4) In January 1998, Terrell Davis and the Denver Broncos shocked the Green Bay Packers 31-24 at Qualcomm Stadium in San Diego to win Super Bowl XXXII. Davis, who was named Super Bowl MVP despite playing with a migraine headache, ran for 157 yards and scored an NFL championship game record three rushing touchdowns in the Broncos upset win. Davis' heroics enabled Broncos legend John Elway to rip the proverbial Super Bowl monkey off his back as he captured his first championship in four attempts.

3) In January 1989, Joe Montana and the San Francisco 49ers burned the Cincinnati Bengals 20-16 at Joe Robbie Stadium in Miami to capture Super Bowl XXIII. Behind 16-13, iconic signal-caller Joe Montana precisely marched the 49ers down the field before hitting wide receiver John Taylor for the winning touchdown with 34 seconds remaining in the game. Joe was "cool." Nevertheless, the MVP of the big game was Niners receiver Jerry Rice. Jerry was nimble and Jerry was quick as he caught 11 passes for a Super Bowl record 215 yards and one touchdown.

2) In January 1991, while the United States was at war "with Sadaam and the Iraqi's," the New York Giants and Ottis Anderson beat Scott Norwood and the Buffalo Bills 20-19 by a wide-right foot at Tampa Stadium in Florida to win Super Bowl XXV. Anderson, who carried the ball 21 timed for 102 yards and one touchdown, was named Super Bowl MVP. As if the game wasn't tremendous enough by itself, the contest also helped inspire a modern comedy classic (Ace Ventura) and it featured Whitney Houston's rousing rendition of "The Star Spangled Banner." The game was "not exactly a lightweight, Dude."

1) Quarterback Eli Manning and the New York Giants played perfectly last year against the previously unblemished New England Patriots and they muscled a tremendous 17-14 victory at the University of Phoenix Stadium in Glendale to win Super Bowl XLII. The second most-watched TV program of all-time in the United States saw Manning throw both of his vital touchdown passes in the fourth quarter en route to earning the Super Bowl MVP award. Outside of the New England region, the only "heartbreak" from the Giants epic upset of the Patriots came during halftime via Tom Petty and his bands performances.

The above are my personal rankings and I stand by them. Needless to say, I expect to receive a litany of hate mail in response to my published listings. By all means, bring on the wrath.

*Bill Belichick and the New England Patriots engaged in the illegal practice of videotaping opposing coaches' signals from the start of the 2000 season until they were caught cheating in September of 2007.